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Fortunately, the sparkles make them easy to spot and thus simple for the vampire hunters to kill.
Unfortunately, our town is now overrun with lousy vampire hunters. They are the worst tippers!
Fortunately, they will be a great tourist attraction, which will boost our economy.
Unfortunately, it's still Canada.
Fortunately, everybody loves Canada!
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Unfortunately, that's not actually true.
Fortunately, Canada doesn't mind.
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Unfortunately, that means Canada doesn't matter.
Fortunately, we still have America.
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zeogold: Fortunately, we still have America.
Unfortunately, Canada is part of America, as is Argentina.
Fortunately, we still have 'Murica.
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Unfortunately, 'Murica does not actually exist.
Fortunately, 'Muricans do.
Unfortunately the rest of the world knows it.
Fortunately, the 'Muricans don't care.