Banned because I suddenly got an idea for a new forum game after reading your ban. I think it'd be fun to have a forum game where all the users must converse (post) in a way that people back in the year of the current page of the forum thread (which is 1948 in this case) would speak. If the thread's total pages happened to exceed the current calendar year, then maybe we could assume the way people in the future would actually speak to one another.

Banned because your idea might be good, but the post was too long and i did not read it.

Banned because we're not in an elevator!

Banned because we are on an escalator.

^ banned for traveling upward on a descending escalator

Banned because just because i'm posting drunk again, that doesn't mean i should be ash.. asha ... ashame ... *barf*

^ banned because teenagers should not imbibe "adult libations" and you need to buy me a new pair of Bates combat boots

Banned for obnoxious defamation of my charac... *barfs again and falls into coma*

^ banned for forcing me to use my emergency first aid training and then employ the "fireman's carry" to get you to the medic's tent for immediate medical attention

^ Banned because if i was sober, i'd show you the rautek maneuver which isn't as stressful on your spine.

Banned for making me look up your subtitle and finding that you're a Lego Monkey King fan

^ banned because the Rautek Maneuver is not the fastest method for the rapid tactical lift and transport of an unconscious person who is non-ambulatory

Banned for getting confused and using the Heimlich maneuver instead.

^ banned for being confused that I was confused, he was also choking on his chewing gum

Banned because I want to know how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop chewing gum.