Banned for making educated guesses, because guesses are supposed to be ignorant and ridiculous.

Banned because they aren't ignorant and ridiculous if you use a guess-timate instead.

Banned for using your guest teammate. You should be working together to achieve a common goal.

for being too cool

Banned for being an actual New User.

Banned for being a bully towards new users. You could at least keep up pretenses until we've lured them deep enough into the forum and they can't escape anymore.

Banned for always sticking your tongue out at me!

Banned because today is Thanksgiving. I am thankful for all the bans I received in the past. I will now say a prayer:


Dear lord, please make a movie where Jesus fights the flying spaghetti monster. Amen.

Banned for always making me see red.

EDIT: Banned for blasphemy. And for having changed your name, how confusing!

Banned because changing one's name by itself is not blasphemy.

Banned for reanimating corpses and plotting to have your zombies take over our forum.

Banned because how do you know that they haven't taken over the forum already?

Banned because they have! Zombie processes have somehow restarted themselves and are running in the background and posting spontaneously!

Banned because this can't be true; the zombies would have fixed the forum software already.

Banned for giving the zombies hints on what to do.