Nothing wrong with masturbation.

It is a significant part of the glue that holds our social construct together.

Without it, cases of rapes, male violence and spousal infidelity would skyrocket.

Let's face it, couples rarely have the same sex drive and at least one individual in the couple is likely to need some sexual gratification outside of the couple's regular sexual activity.

At this point, the individual can either satisfy himself or get satisfaction from someone else. If your goal is to make a long term relationship last, satisfying yourself is the better alternative.

Concerning porn, it's more of a gray area. I don't have a problem with the concept of voluntary pornography (people that have natural exhibitionist tendencies putting their stuff out there), but I do have a problem with how the porn industry operates. Lots of exploitation there.

Overall, if you have persistent sexual urges that strongly interfere with your day to day activities which masturbation can't seem to shake off, it's probably a good indication that you have too much pent up energy and are not doing enough exercise. Trying exercising more often and you'll feel better.

Look at the possible problems that can be caused because of it. I've read that a lot of guys with erectile dysfunction (can only get half-erections, etc.) watch a lot of porn (questions and answers I've seen on the internet) and when they've stopped, they seem to be cured. Do you really want it that porn is possibly the only way you can get aroused?

Porn addiction can cause problems in relationships if people aren't open-minded, and especially if it's not controllable

First and foremost, certain people here need to realize that this is NOT a debate about sexuality, masturbation, and the adult industry. This is a self-help thread about A_Future_Pilot, who recognizes something to be a problem for himself and is asking for advice. You might ask why he feels this way, and try to assuage his feelings if they stem from unhealthy social or religious pressures, but preaching your views on the subjects probably isn't welcome nor is it likely helping.

Second, at A_Future_Pilot: Are you serious or joking? If serious, feel free to PM me to talk about it or to say that you're serious but would prefer generic advice posted here without getting too personal. Either way, if you want useful advice, it would help to know a little more about your situation. For example:

- Christian/religious? (Impacts advice, but I can understand if you might not want to discuss that on these forums)
- In a relationship?
- Why do you feel that it's a problem for you? (Just be honest; I'm not going to try to convince you that it isn't a problem if you feel that it is)
- Tried to stop or cut back before? Cold-turkey? Step/cut-back plan? Professional help?

I'm not sure I agree with your way of placing the responsibility outside the individual in this context. I realise that factors such as availability and popularity mean something here and that proper mechanisms for regulation of porn production and distribution should be in place, but still, people aren't usually forced to watch porn.

"Combat" as in getting rid of a potential addiction and/or working against the porn industry for reasons which you have brought up?

I don't feel that legal pornography which shows sex between consenting adults and which is made available by responsible producers and distributors is all that wrong. Then again I don't have full insight into today's industry. I try to respect your opinion here, but maybe you should realise that it doesn't necessarily reflect the whole truth. I'm sorry to hear about your bad experiences, but I don't think blaming the industry or society is a good way to deal with it.

Sounds about right.

Perhaps. On another note, I find that good and effective exercise (i.e. heavy strength training and aerobic endurance training) might increase the sex drive. Maybe increased physical capacity and well-being correlates with increased libido? Nevertheless, it is definitely best to share it with one or more partners. :)

@A_Future_Pilot:

How do you feel about this thread so far?

By the way, does your nickname reflect real plans for the future? :)

Don't know if this was said already, but the best way to get over that is to have more sex.

I'd shake your hand for that, but I'm not touching anybody's hands in this thread :P

+1

The Kinsey Institute has been studying sex for decades and has shown no data to indicate that porn addiction is an actual addiction. Furthermore the non-chemical dependance/reward pathway stuff is the center of much debate and few actual, verifiable facts (I'm sure your gf could tell you all about it if you're interested). Lastly, things previously considered as sexual dysfunctions, such as nymphomania, have been removed from the DSM in recent years for essentially labeling normal people as aberrant (literally nymphomania boiled down to "woman likes sex as frequently as a man, she is mentally ill!").

So perhaps you can understand my reticence to jump the gun with a supposed addiction that so laden with religious overtones.

I don't care if people believe in ideas that are wrong, I do, however, care when they both believe in and promote destructive ideas. Many major religions still teach that masturbation is evil and will prevent you from entering whatever their flavor of heaven happens to be. This is a destructive idea. Likewise the idea that one is somehow deviant for getting turned on by watching a sex act is at odds with both biology and anthropology.

Now, I'm not saying the OP doesn't have a problem. I am saying that it's probably not "porn addiction". However he/she may need actual medical help to identify and treat whatever it is (and as we can see from the quality of this thread, even if the OP is uncomfortable seeking real medical help - non-religious help can be found is preferred - the only real help to be had here is to be pointed in the direction of medical help). The OP could have other problems he/she is trying to not deal with by avoiding them, playing video games or working out, instead of watching porn, to avoid them is not going to solve anything.

I can't speak to your specific situation but it sounds like you're happy with the resolution; that should be good enough for anyone.

Very young people often feel guilty about masturbation, because they don't know any better.

Just thought I'd share some insights on what an important role masturbation plays in the grand scheme of things.

The most pundit opponents of masturbation (the religious right) should review their opinion on it, because without it, the lifestyle they preach wouldn't even be a remote possibility for a bucket-load of people living it.

Maybe for people who lack an overpowering libido to begin with, but for those that have a libido on overdrive, it's already there.

And if you have too much unspent energy, that energy needs to go somewhere ;).

What exercise will do is help channel that excess energy.

Also, getting proper sleep is a good idea. I find that I get aroused randomly for no reason when I don't sleep enough and am tired.

He'll be fine as long as he learns to let it go while piloting the plane ;).

I agree with you on both of your points. I am laying heavy responsibility on the industry and society now as I look back, but when I was in the grips of getting rid of this from my daily routine and mindset, all blame was on my shoulders for the continuation of the activity. However, it wasn't my fault my G.I.Joe's fell into my step-dad's record crate and when I pulled'em out of there, my eyes caught sight of his porno mags when I was 7. And the second time I was exposed to porn, though not physically forced, it was in the social stratem of being around several other boys older than me and of course the feeling that one couldn't leave the room when the porn was turned on. Even though they were 14 and 15, I was only 10. I'm not saying the OP experienced this, just trying to point out that if something similar occurred to them, they shouldn't feel guilty of it, especially since a guilty conscience never beats an addiction.

I don't know what the laws are in Norway, but in the US, the porn industry hides behind our freedom of speech law. I have no earthly idea how a woman getting pulverized by 50 men is a reflection of the freedom of speech, nor how legal and prostitute can coexist since prostitution is actually illegal in the US, but porn isn't. The root word for Porno comes first from Greek in PORNI, which means prostitute. Then the French word of pornography, or pornographos literally means the writing of prostitutes. So right in the word is prostitute. These are not actresses, these are not performers or entertainers but prostitutes and whores.

Look, I'm not trying to say any of this is wrong, right and wrong are for each person to make on their own, which is why OP is asking for help since they personally see a problem with it. However, to say that pornography is "OK" because it's legal in a corrupt justice system is not something I support. I know I'll probably get flamed for it, but just because in the US abortions are legal doesn't automatically mean they're right. Yes, each person should be free to choose what they want to do, as an American I fully believe in this right, including pornography or masturbation as well as abortions, but people shouldn't think them right because a country/government set it as legal.

And I'm sorry, but I have to laugh at your calling porn producers as responsible, not at you, abut just at the concept.

For god's sake, learn how to quote properly.

You should have time for that now that you're no longer spanking your meat seven times a day.

I appreciate your point of view regarding the classification of addiction. Personally, I don't think the majority of people looking at porn are addicted, nor that addiction comes easy with porn as it does with let's say heroin, which since it sounds like you're very knowledgeable on this subject, someone can get addicted to heroin in one shot. But it can happen in porn, just probably not enough for it to be classified as true addition yet.

I can't speak for the Muslim religion, which I do believe says you're damned if you masturbate (though not specifically in the Koran), but nothing in Christianity says masturbation keeps you from Heaven. It goes against the teachings of Christ which focused on forgiveness. He forgave a prostitute in Mary Magdalene, so I seriously doubt the youth of America that enjoys ol'righty or lefty is out of the loop when it comes to Heaven.

The only problem is because Christians are so divided and segmented and because of the explosion of false, greedy, opportunistic pastors and preachers seeking to make money off the exploitation of the weak minded in this country, especially in So. California which is where I live, many of these vultures have the propensity to change things up, like saying masterbation leads to damnation. Unfortunately, this paints a bad image for the religion as being one of archaic dark age thought and practice, which for someone more attuned to the movement of the modern enlightenment such as yourself, comes off as destructive and harmful.

Now I will have to argue your statement that a medical treatment is the only way to help in this. Yes, medically, if you've got an infection, cancer, etc., etc, please go see a doctor. But I have yet to meet a single person being treated medically for something in the mind that has overcome anything, except for people with ADHD, the medicine for that seems to really help calm and focus people up. All medication does is dull the hell out of a depressed or anxious person, not solve their issue. If you consider therapy as medical help, then yes we agree on that, but medicine for especially a porn problem, in my opinion, won't solve a thing, because I smoked a ton of weed, and it only increased the desire for porn, :)

My father-in-law just died of alcoholism. Yes, alcohol is a true addiction since it replaces the nuerons in the brain, but the desire to drink it is still rooted in the psyche. He drank his Lactulouse and took pills that were supposed to curb his craving and he'd go months without anything, but if in the blink of an eye he was deadset on drinking, he'd go and buy a drink since even with everything in the body being medically treated, his mind would still take over. This is why AA programs do not offer any type of medication, since what they're doing is helping to change the mind. This is why alcohol rehabs will not accept you unless you've been clean and sober for minimum of a month, because it has to be in one's will and mind to see it through. Not from a pill.
LOL. . .don't know why that happens when I try to quote, haven't figured it out.

FYI, prostitution is legal and regulated in some US states (and not just Nevada). If prostitution was considered free speech no states could make it illegal.

Performances of any kind have typically been considered free speech.

Some states have an even greater interpretation of free speech than the Federal Government, in these states even nominally illegal activities are protected and there are no longer any arrests for them.

Incidentally you should know that the porn industry in the US is actually extremely heavily regulated. They have to comply with laws that border on the ridiculous in regards to record keeping, etc. The penalties for breaking these laws (which can amount to a record keeping error, i.e. a document couldn't be found upon request, even if it is later located and everything was legal) are also extremely punitive. The people in charge, since they are on the hook for actual prison for the slightest infraction, are pretty anal from what I understand. That is actually pretty responsible for some definitions of responsible, though it's due to rational self interest.

Also, if you say, "I'm not trying to say X is wrong" and in the next breath you say "I don't support X" and intimate X is only legal because of a corrupt justice system, then you're basically saying "X is wrong". I do commend you for presenting it as an opinion, however.

Oh, I'm not trying to imply medical treatment only consists of pills and surgery. However one should see a medical professional to treat medical issues, they are best qualified to help you understand your treatment options and avoid the harmful voodoo which somehow even very intelligent people still fall prey to (and I'm not solely, or even primarily, talking about religion when I say voodoo). Counseling may very well be enough for some people, but the OP is essentially diagnosing himself, which is bad, bad, bad, though it's very tempting and we all do it sometimes. I suggest the OP (or anyone) evaluate whether they actually have some kind of problem (i.e. is shit getting fucked up in your life?), if so, the next step is to talk to a doctor and see both what it might be and what paths you might take to "un-fuck" things.

Doctors are trained to evaluate whether the cure is worse than the disease and this is something normal people tend to forget to do.

As for religions calling people who masturbate "damned", you may call those people "not true Christians" but that's just the "No True Scotsman" logical fallacy. It's very prevalent in many extremely popular religions and even if you personally don't ascribe to that belief it's still a charge that must be answered and dealt with, not hand waved away as a non-issue.

As for doctors treating problems in the head, no one is that good at it at this point in time, but a damned site better than layman in the vast majority of cases. My daughter has Asberger's so I'm around people who have various mental problems fairly frequently. Neuroscience isn't great but it beats the voodoo.