They already have. It's called Master of Magic. ;)

I wish I could skip over winter, and go right back to spring.

Granted. The environmental damage caused by this skip is quickly heading into the billions.

I wish I could uninstall the US Government and replace it with Linux.

^Granted.

However, the deep seated corruption of the US Government; a corruption which reaches all the way to the bottom of satan's belly button, infects Linux.

So what was once a stable and free operation system now becomes a vicious multi-headed virus hell bent on total destruction.

It proceeds to wreak havoc world wide by shutting down systems and back charging customers for prior usage. The astronomical fees incurred by this worldwide viral back charging actually creates a new number never before known to humankind.


I wish my 'frig had a bourbon dispenser instead of water in the door.

Granted. It has a large leak on the bottom leading to your freezer, and you have to fill it up manually, with shotglasses.

I wish I had an MP3 player with every (decent) song in the known universe.

Granted, but the headphone jack is broken.

I wish I own a horse as awesome as Shadowfax.

^Granted

However once in your possession he is quickly exhausted by your constant droning on and gets so bored he runs away and throws himself into an orc filled pit and is eaten, never to be seen again.

I wish the US government would be replaced by cartoon characters. NOW!!!

BZZZT! Cannot accomplish that operation, it would be outright redundant.


I wish for Tim Follin to make a triumphant return.

Granted, he comes back with a bang along with other 80s and 90s people from the industry, but now they are burnout and without ideas, the video games industry have another crash worse tan the one from 1983.

I wish for a cool gift that I can give to my girl.

Granted. You got a pack of ice cubes.

I wish that I can sleep as long as I want without getting fired.

Welcome to your new job as a mattress tester.

I wish I were half my age.

Granted, but only half your body got young again.

I wish Jasmine or Shantae is real so I can date them.

Granted, even both of them at once. But they are so shallow in real life that you wish to stab your ears with sissors each time they want a conversation.

I wish I could not fall in love any more and live a bliss life of not-giving-a-fuck about it.

If you wanted to be a zombie, all you had to do was ask.

I wish Ben & Jerry's would bring back my favorite retired ice cream flavor.

Granted. The stock of bull testicles is refilled.

I wish I could learn stuff faster so that I have more free time afterwards.

Of course. I hope you don't mind the direct implant into your brain. Try not to disconnect the USB cable.

I wish Dr. Ashens took over the USA.