Fellow nerds! Thanks to the huge generosity of chris.frukacz, I am able to hold this Crusader giveaway. This would not have happened without his help. So, please, someone gift him some games!

To begin, here is a picture of me licking Crusader: No Remorse. This is how much I love the game. I want to spread this to as many people as I can. (Crusader).

So, this contest is going to be simple. In Crusader, the protagonist is silent. He is referred to as "The Silencer." I want you guys to tell me what The Silencer would say if he took off his helmet. See attached pictures to get a feel of what he's like.

Don't limit yourself to one line. Be as creative and expansive as you'd like. You can submit your entry as a text reply, a cartoon drawing, a Flash animation, a microphone recording, whatever. As long as you have The Silencer in a conversation, you're entered! Submit as many as you like, but keep in mind just 'cause you have the creativity of a rabid baboon I'll give it to you. (I probably will).

DISCLAIMER: BOBA FETT JOKES WILL NOT BE TOLERATED

I'll PM everyone their gift code. I'm going to try and limit to two or three codes a day so new people see this thread. Keep it bumped up over the next five days or so!

*takes off helmet*
"..."


Alternatively:

*takes off helmet*
"I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass... and I'm all out of bubblegum"
*glares*

I already own mine :) but I would be interested in copy so I could spread the love of crusader among my loved ones or friends...

*Before battle between Silencer and 50 enemies, the Silencer tooks off the helmet and with no hint of emotions says* "Before meeting you, I killed 150 enemies with my rifle, 30 with my knife and 10 with my bare hands, what do you think makes you so special that you will stand a chance? I lived so long, because even the Death itself fears my wrath...go on then, I will let you fire first." *After 5 minutes of massacre the Silencer puts on his helmet and begins to make marks on his rifle, knige and glove* "That makes it 180 with rifle, 40 with knife and 20 with bare hands"

I do not participate, as I instantly bought the game :)

*takes off helmet*
"damn, I really can't breath under this helmet. Can someone put some holes in it?"

*ahem*

"My name.. is Obon Srgg"

*ducks and flees Vagabond's wrath*

*The Silencer takes off his helmet* and says: "Why do d***s go in c***s? It's the natural order of things. Humans have always disliked dwarves and elves. Not for me to know why, I am a robot."

Sorry for my horrible entry, but I just can't get that line out of my head... ;<

Cool contest.


Hello, I am the Silencer. I enjoy death, destruction, pools of blood, picnics, fuzzy bunnies and romantic moonlit walks on the beach.

In point of fact, I quite enjoy conversation. It's just that I enjoy killing even more. This presents a bit of a paradox: if a tree falls in the forest, but no one's around to hear it, does it make a noise? Now, let me ask you this. If I speak to you, but you're dead, do you hear it? Good question, I don't know. I would ask you, but guess what? You're dead!

Matter of fact, this reminds me of what happened the other day with my wife. She looked at me sternly, and said 'Silencer, why don't you talk to me? It would mean a lot if you would just say something to me every now and again. You know, tell me I'm pretty, that kind of thing.

I was feeling quite guilty after she told me that, so I decided to give her a massage. A few minutes later, I choked her to death. Then I said, 'Darling, you are beautiful!' I'm sure she would be ecstatic about that, if she were still alive, I mean.

P.S. If you are hearing me now, then ghosts must exist. Because you're dead. Sorry about that.

"I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis."

Okay, that was low-hanging fruit.

The motorcycle helmet wearers might appreciate these:

"Phew, it smells like ASS inside that thing!"

Sees reflection in mirror: "Stupid helmet hair..."



"Defeating the Consortium would be a lot easier if I could move in more than 8 directions."

Not an entry, for comic(?) relief only - I already bought it from GOG.

Heh, for a moment then I thought "That entry must win for it just bolded itself".

"How come nobody ever pays attention to anything I say? Oh look, my helmet's mike is switched off - wonder how long it's been like that..."

Ohhhh I bolded it to avoid the weird quotation problem, to make sure it was all considered one entry and not split up into five parts.

*takes off helmet*
"Duke, I am your father."

The Crusader removes his highly advanced tactical helmet. For the first time in as long as he could remember, he sees color as it really is.

Huh. Blood's red? It's prettier than I expected.

He then slams his helmet back on and continues to decorate the World Economic Consortium's walls with the blood of their greedy employees. Soon, he hopes, their entire complex will match his suit.

Oh Silencer, you so funny.