I've installed the game successfully, but before I can run it for the first time, it says I must connect to GFWL to "verify the release date of your game". When I click "Continue", I get the error "Games for Windows - LIVE cannot connect to the LIVE Service. Please make sure your computer is connected to the internet."

This error appears nearly instantly after clicking "Continue", so I can only assume that a firewall program is blocking it or a required port is closed. The only antivirus programs I have running are Malwarebytes and Microsoft Security Essentials, and the only firewall I have running is Windows Firewall.

If I could fix this problem, I'd have a chance to re-evaluate my opinion of the game, because I'd actually have a chance at playing it.

Running Windows 7 Ultimate x64

There are complaints about the PC version stacking up rather quickly. Aside from the GFWL problem it seems to be an extremely sloppy console port. Seems to be the reason they delayed the PC demo until after it was released.

If you do get it to work, it will continue to suck until you hit mute and scratch the subtitles.

I had similar troubles with GFWL with Batman: Arkham Asylum. Normally the client would work for me, and then out of nowhere, on the same internet connection, it would say there was no connection. This happened enough times that I gave up on the client and the game.

Really? =\

I NEED subtitles...

I've been having trouble with signing into live recently but signing into the microsoft pssport site fixed that. Might be worth a shot

It's not signing into LIVE that's the problem. I can even sign in using a standalone GFWL client. It's this thing, this "Zero-day Piracy Protection Tool" that can't connect properly to LIVE. Before running it, it says "No personal information will be sent to Microsoft. A LIVE ID is not required." It's just checking to see that the release date for the game has passed, like the one for GTA IV.

Trust me, you don't want to read the stupid pouring out of the character's mouths. Ignorance truly is bliss. The story is more forgettable than Angry Birds.

Did you try identifying the program via process, find where it is on the computer, opening the control panel, system & security, allow a program through windows firewall, authenticate as admin button, add program, navigate to problematic program, give it access, save changes and try again?

Yes

Ahhhh, DRM. Always just a simple matter of 'install and play'. I wonder why people complain about it? :p

Have you used GFWL much in the past? It might be that the communication is being blocked at the network layer rather than the application layer. Most routers say they're uPNP compatible but I've never seen a home one that really does the job without screwing ut up occasionally. The GFWL ports you need to forward to your PCs IP address are as follows:

Port forwarding must be enabled on the UDP and TCP port 3074.
Port forwarding must be enabled on the UDP port 88
Port forwarding must be enabled on the UDP and TCP port 53
Port forwarding must be enabled on the TCP port 443

It claims you also need to do port 80 but I never have and haven't suffered a problem with it
Don't you mean its a simple matter of 'install, play and defeat 100% of piracy ever!'?

More like 'install, try to play, frustration, internets, realise the pirates have it right and download crack, install crack, thank the gods that pirates exist and THEN FINALLY PLAY!'

I vaguely remember a similar problem with Dead Rising 2 as I had not updated GFWL for some time. Try going into Bulletstorm/Binaries/Win32/ZDP and then running zdp.exe.

If it's the same as the problem I had with Dead Rising 2, that'll allow the game to check whether it should unlock and thus, allow you to update GFWL if it needs to.

I can run the GFWL Marketplace client, I can run games bought from that client, such as Dark Void AND run the GFWL client from within that game, and I can run GFWL from within other games installed from physical media like Batman Arkham Asylum and Red Faction Guerrilla. It's just this one thing, this "Zero Day Piracy Protection Tool" that won't connect.

So how exactly do I forward ports?