Banned for not having a pal named Patine.

Banned for not knowing that the pig's name is Chris P. Bacon.

Banned because 100% of the profits from our Pig Latin course will go to help keep pigs like Chris P. Bacon alive.

Banned for cruelty against my mouth.

Banned for licking a phoenix which is frostburned.

^ banned, for sexual innuendo

EDIT:

^ banned, because after paying your overhead, employees wages, operating costs, bonuses to corporate officers, and other miscellaneous graft, lobbyists, and contributions to political parties, senators, and congressmen, only 1.3% is actually earmarked to help pigs, most of which helps them stay alive long enough to be processed into bacon and other pork products such as SPAM

Banned for sexual innintendo

Banned for swinging a cartridge-shaped dong.

Banned because my mind wants to keep playing Spider-Man so I can swing some webs, but my body is falling asleep.

Banned because the citizen who needs saving can wait.

Banned for triaging

Banned for banned-aging.

Banned because that is not true. I just called that person and he said he was fine if J Lo needed some time to rest first.

EDIT: Banned for being a ninja. But I guess that's understandable seeing that you're Spiderman >3>

Banned because I just ran out of Coffee.

Banned for not immediately running to your nearest minimart.