1 joke 1 post.

My dog had a fever. Al began applying mustard to its back.
I said, 'Al what are you doing, mate?'
He replied, 'Isn't it obvious? Mustard is the only thing for a hot dog!'

Left to right.

The Dalai Lama orders a pizza:

"Make me one with all!"

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.

Warning: this one is really, really ancient;

A Belgian, Frenchman and German are climbing a high mountain.

When they reach the summit, the Frenchman bursts into tears of joy upon seeing the wide panorama

The German bursts into tears of joy, because they made it to the top in one piece and all their effort has been rewarded with a magnificent sight.

The Belgian drops his backpack, sinks down unto the ground, and starts sorrowfully moaning. After a while, while the other two are busy with their revery, he loudly exclaims: "Goddamn, I'm TIRED", which echoes majesticly into the valleys down bellow ...

Mother, mother - come and see the ugly moose I shoot dead in the backyard.
Mother....Mother!
MOTHER?

The worst one I can think of:

How many germans does it take to change a lightbulb ?
One, we are efficient and have no humour.

...I don't get it.

Here's one I found online that I think is rather funny:

Why did the multithreaded chicken cross the road?

to To other side. get the

Source: http://www.mooreds.com/wordpress/archives/211

(This page sites another site, but the link redirects to the site's main page and is therefore useless.)

A Dutch, a German, an old nun and a young hot blonde sitting in a train compartment. The train enters a tunnel, everything goes dark. Then suddenly there's a loud *SLAP*. When they exit the tunnel, the Dutch is rubbing his reddend cheek.

The nun thinks: "The Dutch must have grabbed the blonde's boobs and she slapped him."

The blonde thinks: "The Dutch must have tried to grab my boobs but accidently grabbed the nun's and she slapped him."

The Dutch thinks: "The German must have grabbed the blonde's boobs, and she thought it was me and slapped me instead."

The German thinks: "Stupid Dutch, next tunnel I slap you again."

Here's one from my friend

What will happen if you take a watermelon, make a little hole, take out the inside, fill in ice cubes, shake it, and then roll it on the floor?

it will roll away from you

The European Union!

Me neither.

A neutron walks into a bar and asks, how much for a whisky? The bartender says, seeing it's you, no charge.

How is the Starship Enterprise like toilet paper?

It circles Uranus to wipe out Klingons.