Isn't it illegal where you live?

Hey, I could name a dozen positive things having porn does, when there's no girlfriend in sight! But I won't, 'cause that would mean admitting I have it too. Oh wait...
I should probably start singing now.

WHAT KIND!

Bits of most everything, there's certainly limits but I'll watch a broad variety of stuff, as much through boredom as anything else. Frankly the majority of it is forgettable or samey, very few I'd be annoyed at losing should the drive die
The fact that I can find any porn samey or forgettable is another indicator of my rather pathetic life
Hey a lot of people have girlfriends, its nothing to be ashamed about (depending on the girl)

Depends on the alternative. The alternative was to spend a nice time with a wife which is way better

Depends on who's wife...

And what she looks like
Anyway having porn on your hard drive doesn't mean your life's pathetic. There are two kinds of man around: those who watch porn and those who are ashamed to admit it.

I always thought that the apex of sadness is when you don't watch porn because you're bored but watch it UNTIL you're bored

At least you don't have to watch for too long. The plot is usualy, er... one-dimensional

Everything is illegal here.
I am amazed that the washroom isn't made illegal yet.
Actually porn is illegal if its in your mobilephone. Knowing the authorities, they probably confiscate it and add it to their own collection.
My friend from Australia once ask me: Why does the Malaysian flag looks exactly like the United State flag?
My reply to him was Malaysia is a land of piracy (we can't even come out with an original flag) and hypocrisy (banned everything but do everything).

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! Screwed up my drivers licence test AGAIN! Why the hell can I do it flawlessly with the online practice test and fuck up the real one?

People here are awfully judgmental.
The ability to speak and write in English does not imply that one can't speak mandarin, Cantonese or other dialects.
In fact, I can actually speak mandarin and 2 chinese dialects. Apparently, everybody loves to judge the book by its cover here.

I am impressed, Mandarin 101 kicked my ass. But I am not a language person, either.

Actually, Mandarin is the most difficult language I have learned in my entire life. Studied in Mandarin for 9 years and I still sucked at it.
Most of the time, I just barely passed the Mandarin exams.
I prefer English most of the time. Also, I also speak and write in Malay (mandatory, not too bad because they tend to emulate many of words from English)

So can I... Mandarin and Cantonese.