I have tried Lutris, i've tried Heroic, I tried using Bottles; nothing works and this game refuses to launch at all.

The best I can achieve is a black screen where the intro video should be but it just sits there and the moment I click, it crashes.

None of the "Fixes" help either, I've tried the exe with the dll in the folder, nothing works.

If there is a way to get this game to run on Linux, I have no idea how to do it, I've tried searching the net too; there is nothing out there for how to get it working.

I know it's a long-shot to post this but who knows, maybe some computer genius knows a secret trick.