I am attempting to get the gravedigger out of his barricaded house, and he will only come out when there are no enemies left, or zombies which ever it is. I have no idea how to get him out, because I cannot stop the enemies re-spawning, so when I go around the map to kill all of them, when I go around the map a second time, they all come back. Is there something that I am missing?

I never finished this, as I rerolled, but I had assumed you had to get rid of the source of the problem by going down into the crypts. There is one particular boss down there (left building) that you may have heard about in talking with the townspeople. I could be wrong, but I too tried clearing the entire map.

kill all zombies you can find and go to the gravedigger.

But we're saying we already did that. If what you're saying is true there must be some annoying pack sitting somewhere at the edge of the map (though I'm pretty sure I checked that as well). I even cleared out all the buildings even though those were ghosts.

i didn't have any problems with that quest. but i don't know more if i cleared the dungeon first. i think not.

You don't need to clear dungeons, just clear every big pack inside and outside of cemetery walls. Only when you clear all spirits, gravedigger will come out...