I've never been that great at Titan Quest and Grim Dawn builds. It's always tempting to spread points too thin.

Anyway, here's something kind of like what I'm going for so far:

2H melee Warder (Soldier + Shaman)
http://grimcalc.com/build/ho7RtH

Seems like the most canonical class combo for 2H melee. You might even be able to may a shield-using Warder, but I'm less confident about the options available on the Shaman side of things there. I'm in the early 20s and I have the Bull constellation unlocked and most of the Fox.

Damage is mostly Physical, Bleeding, Lightning, and Trauma.

* Using Savagery instead of Cadence

* Doing stuns and damage with both Primal Strike and Forcewave

* No summons

* Taking some points in the random on-hit procs, not sure if worth it.

* Soldier passives are mostly good except for Veterancy (and obviously, the ones that require a shield in this case)

* First taking Soldier to 40 for War Cry + disruption and general stats, then taking Shaman to 50 for Primal Bond.

* Mogdrogen's Pact has some sequels that look good. Menhir's Will is pretty important.

Ok, so I should probably scrap a couple things and crank up something else, but I never know what I should be doing. So far Slam (from enchanting gear) is doing more damage than any of my actual skills. It's fine for now, but it seems to take a while to grind through Arkovian ruins and most areas in general.

Yeah, it's pretty obvious XD Problem:
Damage is mostly Physical, (you have low level skill, small base damage, poor scaling)
Bleeding, (skeletons and ghosts don't bleed. No idea, maybe they don't have blood?)
Lightning, (scales with spirit, which you have low
and Trauma. (has poor scaling in general) You should start from maxing your bread and butter skill, savagery. It increases flat damage per charge and amount of charges way faster than gear upgrades at low levels. (8 charges for 22 lightning damage each * 196% bonus to lightning = well above 350 dps)
Then you go for survivability (max any mastery).
And after getting decent survivability, you put points into dps skills.
Field command - 1; Squad tactic max was for a while the best choice.
get wendigo totem 1 +bloodpact 1 for chance of lifesteal.
I wouldn't recommend Primal bond exclusive for warder, either go for Oleron's wrath (OA is an amazing stat) or Stormcaller pact (fightning spirit gives a lot of crits, and SP makes them BIGGER)

It's not like I memorized the zones in advance, so I didn't pre-emptively min-max out of Bleeding because I was planning for skeletons. I sort of dislike that kind of planning, but I guess with trivial respec costs, it doesn't hurt to adapt that way on the fly. It used to cost a lot more in the beta to fix that sort of thing.

I guess the skill points to up the stun duration aren't that urgent, same with some of the other things. I'll probably be out of the ruins pretty soon, so the bleeding should start to scale better.

Heh, you are talking about bleeding. Damage over time.
With the build focused to kill asap. even if you get 1000 blleding damage over 10 sec, it would be less than your 350 damage per hit every sec.
It's not the stat you should look as melee.

Well, the stat is all over the trees anyway. Maybe write a letter to Crate.

Or use some kind of cheat to get a few hundreds bonus skill points:)))

Note: I am taking my characters in RPGs very seriously, so no cheating unless it is made for "science" (theorycrafting).

Bleeding isn't for savagery.
It's for Blade arc, nightblades or devouring swarm builds.

Savagery is way totally bleeding like zomg blood everywhere.