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Before consoles can't ketchup.

Ba dump tss

Bad, I know. I read it yesterday and I pretty much grimaced. However, I have been thinking about it since then; horrible as it may be I would like to know more (bad?) jokes about this hobby. So why not make a thread to list them all?

To make it a bit (more?) fun, provided the joke is one of this question/answer things, one could answer the previous person's question and pose a new one. And it could be expanded to other nerdy stuff such as "why do mathematicians confuse Halloween with Christmas?" or "How many assamites are required to change a light bulb?"

I don't know. This thread is simple bait to see if I get to read a few jokes and, if I'm lucky, laugh a bit. I hardly know any myself, so I probably wouldn't even participate. So feel free to ignore it, but the bait is still here. Let's see what I fish.
To paraphrase Cracked, I don't know whether it's pro PC gaming, anti PC gaming, or you just forgot your meds.
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Starmaker: To paraphrase Cracked, I don't know whether it's pro PC gaming, anti PC gaming, or you just forgot your meds.
Must be because of the weather here. We have had an ongoing rain season since it stopped snowing. Except for a couple of days, we have had temperatures 10 to 15 degrees below the seasonal average.

Remember the Bible, Noah and the ark. 40 daysand 40 nights of rain ? In belgium, we call that "summer"
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Starmaker: To paraphrase Cracked, I don't know whether it's pro PC gaming, anti PC gaming, or you just forgot your meds.
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Phc7006: Must be because of the weather here. We have had an ongoing rain season since it stopped snowing. Except for a couple of days, we have had temperatures 10 to 15 degrees below the seasonal average.

Remember the Bible, Noah and the ark. 40 daysand 40 nights of rain ? In belgium, we call that "summer"
+1. Luckily, this gives me more reasons to complete my backlog.
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Phc7006: Must be because of the weather here. We have had an ongoing rain season since it stopped snowing. Except for a couple of days, we have had temperatures 10 to 15 degrees below the seasonal average.

Remember the Bible, Noah and the ark. 40 daysand 40 nights of rain ? In belgium, we call that "summer"
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sibberke: +1. Luckily, this gives me more reasons to complete my backlog.
In the Keweenaw we call it Tuesday.

Well okay it's not that bad, or really even close, but I thought that sounded funny. :D
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tinyE: In the Keweenaw we call it Tuesday.

Well okay it's not that bad, or really even close, but I thought that sounded funny. :D
hey, that reminds me of someone!

...wait, that's me
you mean Mustard Rice
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P1na: "why do mathematicians confuse Halloween with Christmas?"
Because OCT 31 = DEC 25

But how does a mathematician make a fried egg, when he doesn't have eggs available?
-easy, he goes to the store, buys some eggs, goes home, puts a pan on the stove and fries an egg.

Now, how does a mathematician make a fried egg, when he DOES have eggs available?
...


(no one? OK, I'll answer it myself: He just throws the eggs away to reduce the problem to a known one.)
Post edited June 27, 2013 by Lifthrasil
Do you sometimes think that programmers are frustrated comedians if you read something like: Error. Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.

Or this nice popup that states: Keyboard not responding. Press any key to continue.

I like this Windows message too: Windows hat ein neues Gerät erkannt. Das neu angeschlossene Gerät konnte jedoch
nicht erkannt werden. (sorry don't know the english version)
We're smarter.
Well, I saw a couple of signs earlier today, halfway up a flight of university stairs (put there as directions for visitors). One said 'computing department' with an arrow pointing up the stairs. The other said 'computing department', with an arrow pointing down the stairs...
Why are PC gamers a mustard race?
B/c we mustered all that we can out of our gaming rigs. ;)
some very bad jokes i made up myself (others must have thought of them too)....

Why do most plane crashes from wet weather occur in Spain?
Because the rain in Spain falls mainly on the planes!

When do extremely bored people jump out of boats?
When their over-bored!

Why did the old man retire?
Because his car got a flat!

Why did the chicken get run-over?
Occupational hazard

Edit: just thought of the dumbest thing i ever did, this is funny..... I was ready to back the boat down the boat ramp into the water, but realized i had forgotten to bring the battery for the boat engine. So i borrowed the battery from the car, installed it in the boat, then jumped in the car and turned the key to start the car to reverse the boat down.....DARRRRR Ok then i tried to push the boat down by hand, it slid off the trailer onto the ground...DARRRRRR
Tried to winch it back into the trailer, the winch broke.... DARRRRRR then it started raining, fixed all that, half way home car broke down....DARRRRRR.... conclusion - never go outside!
And incase your wondering, no a plane did not crash into my house later that same day, (not that i wasn't looking out the window for it)
Post edited June 27, 2013 by mystikmind2000
Now one for the Real Nerds (TM):

What do zombie-cosmologists crave?

... Branes!


(Hmm. And with this I killed the thread it seems. Is that considered threadicide?)
Post edited July 02, 2013 by Lifthrasil