MaximumBunny: The only losers are the people who give up. I'm not sure why you're inclined to assume that anyone's first response in life is to quit when they encounter obstacles, but I hope that's not your outlook.

monkeydelarge: And in the future when you hate your life and there is nothing you can do about it, I hope you won't be starving or be a kidnapped person in a cage, so someone like you can come along and tell you to STFU and "grow a pair".

MaximumBunny: You're apparently offended from misunderstanding my post, or you're just taking it out of context intentionally. I brought those things up to show that there are extremes where people's lives can genuinely suck with everything being out of their control. They need charitable, medical or police/military intervention and support.

Then I said that the rest of us need brass balls and to stop making excuses. I didn't say that starving African children need to grow a pair, but I did imply that people like Nirth just make up things to justify their lack of motivation in life and then hide it behind "intelligent pessimism" and other BS labels.

fr33kSh0w2012: Wait until you are looking after your Mentally ILL parent since 1999 till 2014 and you tell me if Life is HOPELESS or not been Looking after my Mentally ILL Mother the past 15 years taking every day as it comes had to put my life on hold indefinitely to help my mother.

My dreams, Hopes and Desires SHATTERED when the doctors told me "You will have to Look after your mother for the rest of your life" when I was just 16 years old it was like they slammed the prison doors shut on my life! I'm always getting there. Getting there always, I don't know where there is but I'm getting there another day another Nail in my coffin, who knows I could be dead tomorrow. I never chose to be born anyway, it just kinda happened. Like how my Mothers Psychosis happened that I helped her overcome.

Like when the kids at High school used to mutilate and Maul me with makeshift weapons and makeshift explosives when I was 13 years old and they were 17 and 18 years old (in Australia we do NOT have Middle school) it's Kindergarten to year 6 then year 7 to year 12 how the Lebanese and Italians used to blow me up shoot me with Nail guns and revolvers and Pretty much tear me to shreds it was fun getting my guts slashed open with a serrated kitchen knife looking at my intestines hanging out of my body threading the slashed Fucking intestines through themselves so I didn't die the ones that were cut longways I just had to leave them alone couldn't even swallow water for at least three to six months my body felt like a dried out HUSK I was so weak yet I still had to wake up in the mornings and go to high school just to be mowed down again and again, Fun anyone! I have a permanently broken shoulder socket that will need physiotherapy when I'm older because someone thought it would be fun to break it at high school.

Then when I was 21 I got my skull shattered by two thugs tanked up on crystal meth and wild turkey bourbon that took off with my mothers pension at 2am because I hadn't eaten anything in a week or slept in a week because I was so hungry and weak and my mother was so mentally ILL that she made me trek to the late night service (gas) station that was 16 kilometers away and I died 3 times on the way to hospital in the ambulance and had my teeth splinering off in my gums for years after until I eventually got most of them removed but have to go back to another dentist because the dentist I was with lanced a nerve cluster in my lower left jawbone at the back that made the whole left side of my body feel like it was gradually being set on fire and left me with serious digestive problems (feels like appendicitis and starts in LOWER RIGHT HAND abdomen but the pain moves around my body can be anywhere at any time)

so yeah I'm getting there I hate my life some days I wish I were DEAD so I don't have to put up with this hideous agony I'm going through, But then I guess I'm being selfish because my mother needs me to run the household like I've been doing for the last 15 odd years!

monkeydelarge: Snip

monkeydelarge: Well according to MaximumBunny, you just suck at life and need to grow a pair because you aren't a starving African or a kidnapped person in a cage. So with this amazing advice <- sarcasm, you should be able to start changing your life, tomorrow. I think he is wrong, of course.

monkeydelarge: No offense but Finnish music is perfect for this thread. Finns make good dark and depressing music.

MaximumBunny: but I did imply that people like Nirth just make up things to justify their lack of motivation in life and then hide it behind "intelligent pessimism" and other BS labels.

Nirth: Get it now?

MaximumBunny: Oh, so you just see it as being mean or unsympathetic. You would be 100% correct then. When you pat these types of people on the back you just encourage them to continue down the same failure road that leads them on. They're not there because they're lonely and just needed you to tell them they could do it. They're there because you didn't tell them they were wrong to quit and how they need to realistically progress to reach their goals. We live in a politically correct world that fears upsetting people and anyone who steps out and says the truth gets labeled as "asshole of the year"/"bullshit comments of the century".

2 different boats. You've already mentioned your medical issues and that's understandable. It does make it more difficult for you to understand the situation too. When you say "life is not that simple", you're actually referring to the many mistakes they've made that built up to an unmanageable scenario. Taking on debts, making poor relationships, and other *choices* that lead them down that road. There are only 2 types of people: those who start out in a sinking boat and those who start in boats with oars. When you're in the latter and you're crying about not traveling as fast or as far as others, of course I'm going to call you out on it.

MaximumBunny: fr33k has many medical conditions as well as his mother. Being born into a violent neighborhood would also constitute a serious disadvantage. I sympathize with the disadvantaged (including yourself), while I don't sympathize with the rest. And you seem to have a problem with this, which doesn't bother me one bit.

Like Misteryo brought up, when people come out of a disadvantaged state to success they're quite the inspiration. If you want to let your handicaps define you then go ahead. There will always be someone worse who didn't let that hold them back, and they'll be the ones that people remember.

But when you start crossing that line where all you do is tell people that everything is hopeless and look up as many sad stories as you can to justify yourself being a quitter, that's when you just become a disease that needs to be cut off from the rest. For example, you saying fr33k's life can't get better just because of your mental condition is asinine. I can't tell if you just don't know any better or if you're purposely being a fool.

monkeydelarge: 1. You must have me confused with someone else. In this thread, I never revealed anything about my life other than I think life sucks.
2. Calling people who "suck at life", calling them "losers" and "failures". Saying they need to "grow a pair" is 100% pointless if you are trying to help people. You think they don't fucking know? Rubbing that shit in their face is counter productive. Like I said earlier, it is basically trolling. Don't fucking try to pretend you were trying to help these people.
3. Being realistic makes me a disease that needs to be cut off from the rest? I can say the same about assholes like you who makes people feel like garbage and then pretends it is for their own good.
4. I never said fr33k's life can't get better. Of course, it can get better. It depends on his destiny. Stop jumping to all these stupid assumptions about me for the sake of your argument. In other words, cut the bullshit out.

iippo: ... There are whole lot of people depending on me, so for years (and many years from now on) my hands are pretty much tied and i cant really do what id personally wish to do with my life. Certainly i *could* walk away from all of this (the choice IS there), but choose not to.

Sometimes some younger people complain about how they have nothing in their lives - i myself wouldnt mind having such clear table at times. Not having people, house loans, jobs and such tieing you down to one place has some certain über advantages which are not obvious until you lose them.

Telika: ... In other words, this is a world where Everything Is Rightly Deserved. This dismisses any social, economical, political, cultural issue. This glorifies the Top and stigmatizes the Bottom. This glorifies Being-A-Prick as the highest Moral Virtue. And this instrumentalises anyone's hardship or (temporary or permanent, relative or absolute, objective or exagerated) despair as an opportunity for self-serving praise at their expense. It's not simply narrow-minded, it is deliberately so : this worldview is its own purpose. It's not something you can debate or discuss, as if you were analysing the world. It's a belief driven by a specific intention...

toxicTom: I agree with the rest of your post too. I very much understand your situation - my life is very similar. Call it mid-life crisis but sometimes I really got the urge to leave everything behind and start over. On the other hand I will probably never do this since I have 2 kids that I really love and a wife that I really love most of the time and that I'm lucky to have since she shares quite a lot of my interests (even PnP RPG). And I'm the only one with an income.

Still I feel very much stuck working my ass off and finding time for the family. There's so much I would like to do - but can't for lack of time and money. Sometimes I feel something is shriveling inside for lack of attention and depression and burn out just lurk behind the next corner.

But then there are great days when a project makes progress and the kids are just pure gold and everything works out - and then I'm reminded why I'm doing all this.
toxicTom: +1 to that. This is the world we (in the western world) live in. The world dictated by neo-liberal values. It works in the small scale with single people (no job? depression? grow some balls!) and on the large scale (Greece is bankrupt because people are lazy there!). It's a world without empathy, a world of social darwinism (poor Darwin).

monkeydelarge: I don't believe it's a world of social Darwinism. I believe, it all comes down to destiny.