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Don't go to the bathroom on February 13th. CIA intelligence reports that a major plot is planned for that day. Anyone who takes a poop on the 13th will be bitten on the ass by an alligator. Reports indicate that organized groups of alligators are planning to rise up into unsuspecting American's toilet bowls and bite them when they are doing their dirty business.
I usually don't send emails like this, but I got this information from a reliable source. It came from a friend of a friend whose cousin is dating this girl whose brother knows this guy whose wife knows this lady whose husband buys hotdogs from this guy who knows a shoeshine guy who shines the shoes of a mailroom worker who has a friend who's drug dealer sells drugs to another mailroom worker who works in the CIA building. He apparently overheard two guys talking in the bathroom about alligators and came to the conclusion that we are going to be attacked. So it must be true.
Source: snopes.com
Cocaine is a helluva drug.
Oh, but if only women would run out naked at 7 PM!
Looks like I am gonna poop through a tube that day
My cousins have weird habits. We don't speak much.
I can handle it as long as there's no any kind of teenage turtles. They smells funny.
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jungletoad: Cocaine is a helluva drug.

"I'm Rick James, bitch!"
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shitpants: I can handle it as long as there's no any kind of teenage turtles. They smells funny.

How about gi-wearing sewer rats? Boars with goggles? Rhinos?
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shitpants: I can handle it as long as there's no any kind of teenage turtles. They smells funny.
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Svanhof: How about gi-wearing sewer rats? Boars with goggles? Rhinos?

My mom told me that they do funny things when there's no one watching.. So maybe I keep some distance to them, too.
I've killed all sorts of sewer nasties in RPGs over the years, and alligators rank just slightly above the ubiquitous rat in the "something to get worried about" scale. If they tell us beholders are going to make an underground attack, THEN I'll get worried.
If you post this right now on Ceemdee's thread about giving away games for no good reason, you could win a game!
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HereForTheBeer: I've killed all sorts of sewer nasties in RPGs over the years, and alligators rank just slightly above the ubiquitous rat in the "something to get worried about" scale. If they tell us beholders are going to make an underground attack, THEN I'll get worried.

Don't forget the mind flayers....and anything that drains levels...permanently!
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HereForTheBeer: I've killed all sorts of sewer nasties in RPGs over the years, and alligators rank just slightly above the ubiquitous rat in the "something to get worried about" scale. If they tell us beholders are going to make an underground attack, THEN I'll get worried.

Well, maybe I should have mentioned the alligators are from Eofol? No, I shouldn't!
Best thread title ever.