Posted July 19, 2009
Day 1
My name is Azrael Dogthorn. I'm writing this journal partly to keep my thoughts in order, and partly because I know just how useful it is to find a journal full of advice about the caverns you're in on the body of a dead guy.
People say I'm a "dirty tomb-raider." Maybe I am, but I know how to survive in Arx's most dangerous environments. I can use a sword and some spells, and I fancy I know how to handle myself. So now all I need to do is learn how to handle this dungeon.
Somebody told me that there was dwarven gold to be found in the old mines on level 5. So here's me, looking for the gold, fighting goblins and trolls and whatever else gets in my way, looking for the loot. So far I haven't found much, though I can probably sell some of the junk I found on the goblins.
Day 2
Still haven't found any gold. Found some rats, though. I'm really getting a taste for rat-ribs.
Day 3
Found a dead guy with a journal on him, just like mine. There's nothing useful in it except for random trivia about goblins (they like weevil-cookies, apparently) and a recipe for barbecued rat-ribs.
Day 4
No gold. Found some apples though. Sometimes I wonder where this stuff comes from. I mean, I've never seen any farms or anything, so where do these apples and cabbages and stuff come from? I'd like to know, because they all go really great with barbecued rat-ribs.
Day 5
Still no gold. I killed a troll, though, and he had some gems on him. He also had this hugely oversized pick. If I were troll-sized, maybe I could use this to chip crystals out of the wall.... But I'm not troll sized. Heck, I don't even know how the TROLLS use this things, they're so big...
[Day 6
I'm seriously starting to question the gold rumors. I killed some spiders, but one of them bit me bad. I'm no alchemist, so all I can do with this poison on me is find an unnoccupied cave and lie down until the nausea passes. Good thing I'm fully stocked on rat-ribs.
Day 7
Feeling kind of dizzy. Sometimes I think I can see chickens, and I throw fire at the chickens to turn them into roasted chickens. But then they turn out to be dogs. And when I eat the dogs, they taste just like barbecued rat-ribs.
Day 8
Still woozy from the poison. I've been thinking about the gold, and how silly it is to be risking my life for some shiny rocks. Then I think about barbecued rat-ribs. I'm starting to get sick of rat-ribs.
Day 9
I know the truth now. I taste the cabbages, and they taste a little like RAT-RIBS. All this time I thought it was fruit, but it's really meat. And now I think about it, there were never that many people in Arx. And every time someone's body goes into the crypt, there's no meat on the bones. This leads me to one conclusion: Crispy greens are made of people!
Day 10
Woke up this morning with my fever gone and no torches. On reflection, I ran out of torches 2 days ago. How the hell can I see to write this?
Day 11
Made it back to Arx after some forced marching. I've given up on the gold, I don't think there is any. I'm going to see if the pickings are any good on level 7. And I've resolved never to eat rat-ribs again.
My name is Azrael Dogthorn. I'm writing this journal partly to keep my thoughts in order, and partly because I know just how useful it is to find a journal full of advice about the caverns you're in on the body of a dead guy.
People say I'm a "dirty tomb-raider." Maybe I am, but I know how to survive in Arx's most dangerous environments. I can use a sword and some spells, and I fancy I know how to handle myself. So now all I need to do is learn how to handle this dungeon.
Somebody told me that there was dwarven gold to be found in the old mines on level 5. So here's me, looking for the gold, fighting goblins and trolls and whatever else gets in my way, looking for the loot. So far I haven't found much, though I can probably sell some of the junk I found on the goblins.
Day 2
Still haven't found any gold. Found some rats, though. I'm really getting a taste for rat-ribs.
Day 3
Found a dead guy with a journal on him, just like mine. There's nothing useful in it except for random trivia about goblins (they like weevil-cookies, apparently) and a recipe for barbecued rat-ribs.
Day 4
No gold. Found some apples though. Sometimes I wonder where this stuff comes from. I mean, I've never seen any farms or anything, so where do these apples and cabbages and stuff come from? I'd like to know, because they all go really great with barbecued rat-ribs.
Day 5
Still no gold. I killed a troll, though, and he had some gems on him. He also had this hugely oversized pick. If I were troll-sized, maybe I could use this to chip crystals out of the wall.... But I'm not troll sized. Heck, I don't even know how the TROLLS use this things, they're so big...
[Day 6
I'm seriously starting to question the gold rumors. I killed some spiders, but one of them bit me bad. I'm no alchemist, so all I can do with this poison on me is find an unnoccupied cave and lie down until the nausea passes. Good thing I'm fully stocked on rat-ribs.
Day 7
Feeling kind of dizzy. Sometimes I think I can see chickens, and I throw fire at the chickens to turn them into roasted chickens. But then they turn out to be dogs. And when I eat the dogs, they taste just like barbecued rat-ribs.
Day 8
Still woozy from the poison. I've been thinking about the gold, and how silly it is to be risking my life for some shiny rocks. Then I think about barbecued rat-ribs. I'm starting to get sick of rat-ribs.
Day 9
I know the truth now. I taste the cabbages, and they taste a little like RAT-RIBS. All this time I thought it was fruit, but it's really meat. And now I think about it, there were never that many people in Arx. And every time someone's body goes into the crypt, there's no meat on the bones. This leads me to one conclusion: Crispy greens are made of people!
Day 10
Woke up this morning with my fever gone and no torches. On reflection, I ran out of torches 2 days ago. How the hell can I see to write this?
Day 11
Made it back to Arx after some forced marching. I've given up on the gold, I don't think there is any. I'm going to see if the pickings are any good on level 7. And I've resolved never to eat rat-ribs again.
