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POSTAL seriesMaking murder boring(13 posts)(13 posts)
(13 posts)
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This is my favourite topic
Posted April 17, 2009
Postal is a plot-less top down murder simulation. You go around with a variety of weapons killing as many people as possible, until you've satisfied the arbitrary level requirements. The screens vary, you choose between weapons...and that's it. Unlike Postal 2 which at least features the rudiments of a plot, and some jabs at crude humor, there is really nothing to recommend this game after 3 minutes of play time. Postal gained a great deal of notoriety at the time of its release due to its name and content, and Running with Scissors has since taken on the mantle of clown prince martyr of the game industry. Which is an excellent cover for the pointlessness of their products. It's not that it's buggy, or ugly, it's just played out and monotonous. Original Grand Theft Auto did it much better, and with infinitely more class.
Are you the kind of person that enjoys massacring people on the street, simply because they are there? If so, seek professional help. But don't buy Postal, because you'll be bored to tears like everyone else. It shouldn't surprise anyone that Uwe Boll found this game worthy of a screenplay.
Posted April 19, 2009
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antihippie: because you'll be bored to tears like everyone else. It shouldn't surprise anyone that Uwe Boll found this game worthy of a screenplay.
What's so boring about it?
Also, Uwe Boll used the 2nd one for the most part from what I can tell.
That was actually a pretty funny movie tbh, but let's get back on topic, about the game. Please go more in depth, because it seems like you're simply hating on a game that you haven't played, maybe you looked at the screenshots first, but that's it.
Posted April 27, 2009
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antihippie: because you'll be bored to tears like everyone else. It shouldn't surprise anyone that Uwe Boll found this game worthy of a screenplay.
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Weclock: What's so boring about it?
Also, Uwe Boll used the 2nd one for the most part from what I can tell.
That was actually a pretty funny movie tbh, but let's get back on topic, about the game. Please go more in depth, because it seems like you're simply hating on a game that you haven't played, maybe you looked at the screenshots first, but that's it.

On the contrary, I bought Postal when it came out and finished with it long before it appeared on GOG. Your completely baseless assertions coupled with the fact that you can laugh at the jokes in a Uwe Boll movie demonstrate that your absolute lack of credibility.
Posted April 27, 2009
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Weclock: What's so boring about it?
Also, Uwe Boll used the 2nd one for the most part from what I can tell.
That was actually a pretty funny movie tbh, but let's get back on topic, about the game. Please go more in depth, because it seems like you're simply hating on a game that you haven't played, maybe you looked at the screenshots first, but that's it.
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antihippie: On the contrary, I bought Postal when it came out and finished with it long before it appeared on GOG. Your completely baseless assertions coupled with the fact that you can laugh at the jokes in a Uwe Boll movie demonstrate that your absolute lack of credibility.
your inability to post facts, and your obvious proof of not having played the game recently proves that you're an idiot for writing shitty reviews.
What kind of review is this? did you address the music for it's time? the graphics for it's time? the feel of different weapons?
You just said a bunch of subjective crap and gave it one star. I'm fine if you feel it was only worth one star, or less, that's fine, but write in detail about what you thought was bad about it. I am considering buying this game, but all of these reviews are just subjective personal opinion reviews!!
Posted April 28, 2009
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antihippie: On the contrary, I bought Postal when it came out and finished with it long before it appeared on GOG. Your completely baseless assertions coupled with the fact that you can laugh at the jokes in a Uwe Boll movie demonstrate that your absolute lack of credibility.
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Weclock: your inability to post facts, and your obvious proof of not having played the game recently proves that you're an idiot for writing shitty reviews.
What kind of review is this? did you address the music for it's time? the graphics for it's time? the feel of different weapons?
You just said a bunch of subjective crap and gave it one star. I'm fine if you feel it was only worth one star, or less, that's fine, but write in detail about what you thought was bad about it. I am considering buying this game, but all of these reviews are just subjective personal opinion reviews!!

Who cares about the weapons or the music, when the game itself is crap? Commenting on the music or the weapons (different feel, what a joke) when the game-play itself is tiresome and boring would be a ludacrous waste of time. You're just grasping at straws now. It's getting sad, like watching a man drown. A particularly incoherent and raging man but still.
The core game play is garbage, thus there is no need to go into the music (which is also crap btw). Let me draw you an analogy for your argument: Imagine going to a restaurant and getting served a log of human feces. There it is steaming on your plate, with a carrot flower and a side of mashed potatoes. Naturally, you send it back, and begin warning everyone to get out before they end up with salmonella or worse. Suddenly, out comes the waiter screaming at you for sending it back because, after all the garnish on the side was particularly good. Your rabid fanboyism is getting to the point where you should probably seek professional help.
As for reviews, of course they're subjective genius. All reviews are the informed opinion of the reviewer. Mine happens to be based on actually playing the game, and my desire to warn other unsuspecting individuals off from a similar fate. Your problem isn't with reviews, it's with anyone that speaks ill about this crapheap of a game, which for whatever sick reason you seemed to have affixed your star to. I only hope that once you're medicated properly, you'll be able to understand that.
Post edited April 28, 2009 by antihippie
Posted April 28, 2009
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Weclock: your inability to post facts, and your obvious proof of not having played the game recently proves that you're an idiot for writing shitty reviews.
What kind of review is this? did you address the music for it's time? the graphics for it's time? the feel of different weapons?
You just said a bunch of subjective crap and gave it one star. I'm fine if you feel it was only worth one star, or less, that's fine, but write in detail about what you thought was bad about it. I am considering buying this game, but all of these reviews are just subjective personal opinion reviews!!
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antihippie: Who cares about the weapons or the music, when the game itself is crap? Commenting on the music or the weapons (different feel, what a joke) when the game-play itself is tiresome and boring would be a ludacrous waste of time. You're just grasping at straws now. It's getting sad, like watching a man drown. A particularly incoherent and raging man but still.
The core game play is garbage, thus there is no need to go into the music (which is also crap btw). Let me draw you an analogy for your argument: Imagine going to a restaurant and getting served a log of human feces. There it is steaming on your plate, with a carrot flower and a side of mashed potatoes. Naturally, you send it back, and begin warning everyone to get out before they end up with salmonella or worse. Suddenly, out comes the waiter screaming at you for sending it back because, after all the garnish on the side was particularly good. Your rabid fanboyism is getting to the point where you should probably seek professional help.
As for reviews, of course they're subjective genius. All reviews are the informed opinion of the reviewer. Mine happens to be based on actually playing the game, and my desire to warn other unsuspecting individuals off from a similar fate. Your problem isn't with reviews, it's with anyone that speaks ill about this crapheap of a game, which for whatever sick reason you seemed to have affixed your star to. I only hope that once you're medicated properly, you'll be able to understand that.
fanboyism? I've never played the game, I have no clue what it's like. You're obviously retarded, because I asked for a full review and you can't give me that, you just keep on dishing out garbage. Further more, you feel the need to attack me personally, because I think your sub-paragraph review is crap? Somebody has issues. This is the internet man, relax, but don't say to the world "THIS GAME IS CRAP!!" when your last memory of playing it is from years ago, and you can't be bothered to write more than one paragraph. You're basically just bashing on the game because you disliked it, years ago. You haven't played it recently, so how can you say you still hate it now? Unless you're holding some kind of grudge.
anyway, this isn't youtube or 4chan so take your personal attacks some place else.
Posted May 07, 2009
Sorry for the bump, but... I lol'd.
I love reading crap like this.
Anyways, I agree with Weclock on this subject. A proper review should go in depth, properly explaining why or why not something is good or bad or whatever, instead of posting inane rantings and analogies without giving something to tie them to.
If you can't to that, then just use the vote button instead.
Posted May 07, 2009
You've never played the game? Unbelievable. What the hell are you doing here? You're wasting everyone's time. You have absolutely no clue what you're talking about, and yet you're criticizing my review. You've never heard the music, yet you've criticized me for not reviewing it. Tell me something, when you're mucking out stalls at the local university, or whatever passes for work for you, do you walk into professor's offices and tell them how they're all wrong on the books they've written. "Oh I know absolutely nothing about particle physics, but that monograph you wrote was absolute bollocks."
That's the end of this thread then. It's over, you've admitted you know absolutely nothing, and you're basic problem is that you think I'm a big meanie. Sorry, I can't help the fact that my mean language hurt your little ears. I suggest that you get off the internet and back into your hug-box, so that you never have to read anything negative again.
Posted May 07, 2009
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antihippie: You've never played the game? Unbelievable. What the hell are you doing here? You're wasting everyone's time. You have absolutely no clue what you're talking about, and yet you're criticizing my review. You've never heard the music, yet you've criticized me for not reviewing it. Tell me something, when you're mucking out stalls at the local university, or whatever passes for work for you, do you walk into professor's offices and tell them how they're all wrong on the books they've written. "Oh I know absolutely nothing about particle physics, but that monograph you wrote was absolute bollocks."
That's the end of this thread then. It's over, you've admitted you know absolutely nothing, and you're basic problem is that you think I'm a big meanie. Sorry, I can't help the fact that my mean language hurt your little ears. I suggest that you get off the internet and back into your hug-box, so that you never have to read anything negative again.
It's not the end of the thread, it's the end of you caring to post in it. lol.
And no, you didn't hurt my ears.. this is text.. or are you really that thick? I just figured we could keep it civil but I guess you don't want to be civil about this.
besides that, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to know that there are basic elements to which every video game can be reviewed. You just want to fight more than you want to give a review on this thing, you're nothing but bullshit.
Posted May 07, 2009
So not only did you not play the game that you're tirelessly defending, you clearly do not read either. Your posts are like a shining banner of idiocy mounted high atop a towering monument to retards. As for the ears comment, I'm sorry if simple turns of phrase are too literal for you. I've heard that's a problem for mental defects, so I'll try to be more strait-forward. Now, to clarify: as I've said, again and again, there is no point in an in-depth review to a game that has no redeeming qualities what-so-ever. It would be like discussing the aesthetics of roadkill. Therefore, to write a paragraph or two about the music for example, would be a waste of space when the entire point of my review was to warn people not to even bother with the purchase. As for your claims that I've violated the rules of civility, let's review the facts shall we? It's as easy as dragging a scroll bar.
I posted my review. You responded in the forum to said review claiming, among other things, that I had not played the game, a baseless assertion made clear by my review. When I explained I had in fact both purchased and played the game, you then insulted both my intelligence and yours with an utterly puerile response calling me an idiot. The fact that I continue to post is merely to watch you humiliate yourself in text repeatedly. Your tireless crusade to one-up me on an internet forum, in defense of a game you know nothing about is worth the price of admission. Oh crap, I did it again: OK, when I say that, I'm not saying that we just bought tickets at a movie theater...
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sheepdragon: Sorry for the bump, but... I lol'd.
I love reading crap like this.
Anyways, I agree with Weclock on this subject. A proper review should go in depth, properly explaining why or why not something is good or bad or whatever, instead of posting inane rantings and analogies without giving something to tie them to.
If you can't to that, then just use the vote button instead.

Simply starring a game on this site is demonstrably ineffective, as any vote is diluted overtime, therefore I felt the need to post a review of it. As for explaining why something is good or bad, I suggest you re-read the original review. I summed up the game with as much text as the gameplay itself merited. Postal is a simple game and can be summed up simply: Varies screens, featuring an isometric hero killing people with various weapons, broken up by twisted loading splashes with forced attempts at twisted poetry and humor. You have weapons, you have people to kill...and that's it. I fail to see how that could warrant a two page review.
Post edited May 07, 2009 by antihippie
Posted May 08, 2009
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antihippie: So not only did you not play the game that you're tirelessly defending, you clearly do not read either. Your posts are like a shining banner of idiocy mounted high atop a towering monument to retards. As for the ears comment, I'm sorry if simple turns of phrase are too literal for you. I've heard that's a problem for mental defects, so I'll try to be more strait-forward. Now, to clarify: as I've said, again and again, there is no point in an in-depth review to a game that has no redeeming qualities what-so-ever. It would be like discussing the aesthetics of roadkill. Therefore, to write a paragraph or two about the music for example, would be a waste of space when the entire point of my review was to warn people not to even bother with the purchase. As for your claims that I've violated the rules of civility, let's review the facts shall we? It's as easy as dragging a scroll bar.
I posted my review. You responded in the forum to said review claiming, among other things, that I had not played the game, a baseless assertion made clear by my review. When I explained I had in fact both purchased and played the game, you then insulted both my intelligence and yours with an utterly puerile response calling me an idiot. The fact that I continue to post is merely to watch you humiliate yourself in text repeatedly. Your tireless crusade to one-up me on an internet forum, in defense of a game you know nothing about is worth the price of admission. Oh crap, I did it again: OK, when I say that, I'm not saying that we just bought tickets at a movie theater...
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sheepdragon: Sorry for the bump, but... I lol'd.
I love reading crap like this.
Anyways, I agree with Weclock on this subject. A proper review should go in depth, properly explaining why or why not something is good or bad or whatever, instead of posting inane rantings and analogies without giving something to tie them to.
If you can't to that, then just use the vote button instead.

Simply starring a game on this site is demonstrably ineffective, as any vote is diluted overtime, therefore I felt the need to post a review of it. As for explaining why something is good or bad, I suggest you re-read the original review. I summed up the game with as much text as the gameplay itself merited. Postal is a simple game and can be summed up simply: Varies screens, featuring an isometric hero killing people with various weapons, broken up by twisted loading splashes with forced attempts at twisted poetry and humor. You have weapons, you have people to kill...and that's it. I fail to see how that could warrant a two page review.
Because I am bored of this, I will now say, that I was hoping you would come back and defend your review, not because I actually gave a damn, but because I wanted to piss you off and waste your time. :D This thread demonstrates your slant for this review perfectly.
Posted May 08, 2009
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Weclock: Because I am bored of this, I will now say, that I was hoping you would come back and defend your review, not because I actually gave a damn, but because I wanted to piss you off and waste your time. :D This thread demonstrates your slant for this review perfectly.

We don't need fuNGoo when you're here, Weclock. :P
And just a final word: The review is very arbitrary. The mere basic elements have been explained, but not the quirks of it. I also find there to be more comparison and "background", than there is of the game contet it self.
But this is actually a problem I find with professional reviews about games that are perceived badly as well. They only draw arbitrary comparisons using phrases like "not as good as", without going in depth of what is missing, and just gush out a ton of bile that's not constructive in the least, and have no purpose other than to ridicule at the most basic level. Of course, writing reviews for bad games can be hard in that way, I suppose.
Posted May 08, 2009
Yeah... Agreed with sheepdragon. This is a game that I like because it's just mindless fun for me, because I can look past all it's flaws to find the game the people wanted to make, a mindless isometric shooter, so I say let them not bitch about how it makes muder boring or something, because the gameplay is ok, but the rest of the game seems very... -ish to me. It's a fun game for me though.
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This is my favourite topic
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POSTAL seriesMaking murder boring(13 posts)(13 posts)
(13 posts)