kohlrak: You seem very, very conflicted. Do you have similar problems with games such as starfox?
Never heard of Starfox so far. A quick search says it's a series of space shooters? Other than Elite Plus back in the day, never touched any of those and don't want to.
My ideal RPG, and therefore game, would likely have a huge open world, real time with pause, 3rd person view with a very controllable camera, with a mix of action and pure RPG mechanics that would allow the player to make up for the character's shortcomings to a fair extent early on and the character to let the player mostly just be along for the ride late on, with that world feeling alive and like you're really living in it, offering full escapism, oozing atmosphere and with a great story and writing and memorable characters (if voice acting can be at Bloodlines level, awesome, but otherwise would probably rather do without and stick to just text).
Either fully single player character or at least expecting some players to play it as such and not reduce the experience with potential companions if you mostly keep them in a safe place and return to interact with them now and then, and maybe take them to a number of locations where it's obvious they need to also go.
With training through use and no restrictions or limitations, starting with a rather average character in a hostile setting out to get them but, with enough time and dedication put into it, being able to end up a fully maxed godlike being that'd thoroughly crush anything, and being able to get there just as a result of training, so that can be done alongside exploration and much of the main story may be left for later, so it'd be possible to fully explore nearly the entire game world, clear almost all of that bar a few "dungeon" areas where enemies would respawn whenever you enter to allow for practicing, and once you get to that point of dominating that world that at first you had to use every trick to barely survive the starting areas of, be able to experience and enjoy the rest of the story as well.
And get to make the choices deciding how it moves forward while fully knowing what the consequences will be, and of course with the choices I'd want to make being along the options, so I'd be able to steer the story precisely in the direction I want.
And no randomness or other such variations that would mean needing to reload if wanting the best outcome (or stuff) or, worse, replaying to see everything. I mean, sure, it'd require replaying to steer the story in different directions, but if you know where you want it to go, it should be a matter of fully experiencing that world and that story, immersing yourself in it for probably a few hundred hours if you'd go for that full training (while probably allowing someone who just wants to get to the end and will accept the character's limitations and use companions for help to finish in a fraction of the time, so play it several times in the time I'd take to go through it once if they so desire), rising from unremarkable to the godlike being nothing can touch (in terms of power, no need for the character becoming a god or even some great leader story-wise), getting the outcome you desire and steering the story through the most desirable points on the way to it as well (not really necessary for that outcome to have the fate of the entire world on the table, may be more localized or even more personal stories too), finish it with the satisfaction of it all, perfect character, perfect outcome, close the book on it and move on to something else.
Huh, that was quite a mind dump. Would likely put it differently if I'd try again. And it should be said that I'd play one such game every few years probably, with other stuff in between, but these would be the most memorable ones.