Crimsonland

This game is the absolute epitomy of simple fun. The story? You're stranded on an alien planet. You're surrounded by aliens. Kill 'em all! That's it. That's all the story/motivation you get. Adding to that the fact there's dozens, DOZENS, of guns, some being insanely brutal, some being ridiculously silly, and some being just downright woinky (shrinker, anyone?) as well as a combined sum of... oh heck, I can't count that high... MANY perks to pick from when you level up from butchering those alien bastards! Simply put, what I'm getting at here is the fact that Crimsonland is exactly what it makes itself out to be: a gory, arcade-y top-down shooter that could be played for 5 minutes or 5 hours, and it's going to be pretty much as satisfying every time. Especially those times you get fire bullets with a Jackhammer shotgun.

It starts out as a relaxing, joyous game, exploding baddies in a top-down combat style reminiscent of the early GTAs. It builds up to be more and more hectic, but you slowly go into the zone, so it doesn't matter. And I really do mean "joyous". You see Flamethrower has been unlocked, and you think "This game understands me", then you see the Minigun has been unlocked, and you can't help but break out a huge grin in anticipation. Once the main Quest mode is complete, tonnes of fun modes are unlocked to continue with, including a TYPING MODE! It'll take a while to get tired of this game.

I was deeply disappointed a few years back when the DRM provider for my copy went out of business, leaving me with an unplayable copy of a fantastic game and no recourse. So I was thrilled and hit buy right away when it showed up on GOG. I would have paid for the classic alone, the addition of the updated version is something I looked at as more of a bonus The new version lacks perks in quest mode. You only unlock them for survival. Sure it adds a multiplayer option but not over the net. So while it plays quite a bit different, t's still a blast. The classic version, the one I brought it for? Buggy. Lots of crashes. Widescreen not windowed mode is crashing, got a crash when trying to load scores from the internet, everything I loved is sitting there, and it would go right back to five stars if only it was reliable.

When Crimsonland Classic came out in 2003, it blew my mind of how arcade-like and amazing it was. Now in 2014, we got this 'HD' Remastered version of the game, with more weapons, perks, maps and EVEN more BLOOD. Oh, and hours and hours of fun to be had. With this edition, it became a Diablo II of SHMUP-s. Should I say more?