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Treasure: I personally think that the question of sex should be rather irrelevant where it doesn't concern clear-cut differences between females and males (anatomical for example). That is, I don't think my gender is important or has anything to do with my life or my hobbies or anything similar, but only affects me regarding my anatomy and such stuff. Since videogaming is a hobby, the gender thing should remain largely irrelevant. For one reason or another, it isn't in general, but in this forum, outside of giveaways for females or dicussions about feminism, the gender little matters. And that's good imo.
At any rate, to the question now. Even though the avatars I use tend to be something a girl/woman would choose (I like cute pirates/vampires!), most of the time when I gave something over at open this thread I'd receive some thanks via pm that were like "thanks man" or "thank you sir" or something similiar (the rest of such messages were gender neutral-aka just saying "thank you" or anything similar). I didn't correct them, largely because it was irrelevant and also, why should I correct them? Who cares if I'm a male or a female really? Does it matter? All that matters is that all of us like videogames!
And not only that, but also I feel somewhat flattered, in the sense that "Well, my sex isn't evident-to the point of someone getting it wrong! And that's how it should be!"-why not let them think I'm a male? Since one can't see people behind the screen (how they look like etc) he can't really make an assumption based on anything else than the avatar-which means that one can form the way he's being portrayed by others just by picking an avatar. I personally pick avatars that I like, but more precisely avatars that I feel portray well my inner self. What works for me is the cute pirate-girl/vampire, but other things work this way for other people.
In short (as I wrote a whole thesis answering a simple question), I don't correct people if they get my gender wrong because I don't think gender should matter. You, however, are an entirely different person and thus, you should do whatever you feel like doing regarding this aspect-be it correcting people or not-whatever you feel like doing. After all, why should women reveal themselves just to prove non-casual gamers exist? Aren't there enough surveys proving that? But I guess that's stereotyping for you-and you shouldn't give so much attention to what you're called, if it doesn't seriously bother you.

P.S. After refreshing and seeing the answers added while I was writing mine-I agree with what saith32 just said. :-)
thanks treasure, that was a really great and thoughtful read. Like I said, I really never cared until it was talked about in the ddickinson thread. maybe i'll tell the little feminist voice in my head to shut up and just enjoy myself. :)
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saith32: Internet people are genderless in my eyes:D
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Vythonaut: I'm the exact opposite. I like to know who is who, after all we are all friends here! :-)
and this is also an excellent point. maybe i'll just correct people half the time ;)
Post edited December 04, 2014 by Crewdroog
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Treasure: I personally think that the question of sex should be rather irrelevant where it doesn't concern clear-cut differences between females and males (anatomical for example). That is, I don't think my gender is important or has anything to do with my life or my hobbies or anything similar, but only affects me regarding my anatomy and such stuff. Since videogaming is a hobby, the gender thing should remain largely irrelevant. For one reason or another, it isn't in general, but in this forum, outside of giveaways for females or dicussions about feminism, the gender little matters. And that's good imo.
At any rate, to the question now. Even though the avatars I use tend to be something a girl/woman would choose (I like cute pirates/vampires!), most of the time when I gave something over at open this thread I'd receive some thanks via pm that were like "thanks man" or "thank you sir" or something similiar (the rest of such messages were gender neutral-aka just saying "thank you" or anything similar). I didn't correct them, largely because it was irrelevant and also, why should I correct them? Who cares if I'm a male or a female really? Does it matter? All that matters is that all of us like videogames!
And not only that, but also I feel somewhat flattered, in the sense that "Well, my sex isn't evident-to the point of someone getting it wrong! And that's how it should be!"-why not let them think I'm a male? Since one can't see people behind the screen (how they look like etc) he can't really make an assumption based on anything else than the avatar-which means that one can form the way he's being portrayed by others just by picking an avatar. I personally pick avatars that I like, but more precisely avatars that I feel portray well my inner self. What works for me is the cute pirate-girl/vampire, but other things work this way for other people.
In short (as I wrote a whole thesis answering a simple question), I don't correct people if they get my gender wrong because I don't think gender should matter. You, however, are an entirely different person and thus, you should do whatever you feel like doing regarding this aspect-be it correcting people or not-whatever you feel like doing. After all, why should women reveal themselves just to prove non-casual gamers exist? Aren't there enough surveys proving that? But I guess that's stereotyping for you-and you shouldn't give so much attention to what you're called, if it doesn't seriously bother you.

P.S. After refreshing and seeing the answers added while I was writing mine-I agree with what saith32 just said. :-)
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Crewdroog: thanks treasure, that was a really great and thoughtful read. Like I said, I really never cared until it was talked about in the ddickinson thread. maybe i'll tell the little feminist voice in my head to shut up and just enjoy myself. :)
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Vythonaut: I'm the exact opposite. I like to know who is who, after all we are all friends here! :-)
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Crewdroog: and this is also an excellent point. maybe i'll just correct people half the time ;)
Not me you are all my mannequin friends lol!
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Crewdroog: Guys, if people were calling you a girl (in a not mean way), would you correct them? Have you corrected them?
First, I don't think its rude to correct someone. Another way to look at it is if you let someone call you the wrong thing for a long time and then they find out you weren't, they might feel awful and wonder why you let them do that for so long.

Its simply a courtesy. Someone assumes something (not necessarily a bias) and you let them know they need to update their assumptions.

Clearly, you need to show civility when correcting someone. If you simply state, "I'm a she". you have done all you can. No one sane should have a problem with that.

As a guy, I don't often get called a "she" but my avatars and names generally are of "hes". I do correct people, however, anytime they make a false assumption if I think I will have any semblance of a relationship with that person in the future. If the odds are that I will never speak to this person, or the conversation was an open one where they are most likely speaking to a group while also responding to me... I'll likely let it go. For example, when I played an MMO, someone called me a she. This was rare. I corrected them because I knew I was going to be spending more time around this person and thought they would want to know who I was (before they made an embarrassing assumption based on the previous one). If I'm talking on a forum and a general response to my post is "she has a point". or something generic not really meant as a personal direct comment to me... I'll usually let it go.

I think the bottom line to your question is, do I get offended when people assume things about me? And the answer is, no. Either they made an innocent mistake or their opinion isn't worth my time. Either way, I'm all set. Although, I really do believe that in most cases, its an innocent mistake.

I grew up writing about three possibilities... He, She, or It. And since I don't like calling people It, I tend to default to what I associate with... other guys. Its not intentional, but it is intentional to try and correct. So I try to say things like "that person" or "you" or any other generic term. I don't always catch myself, but I depend on the other part of that equation to kick in... the person I'm referring to, to correct me so I can fix my statement and learn from it.

Don't confuse correcting someone with grammar police or spelling cops. You aren't acting superior or making others feeling inferior when you correct them on something they wrongfully assumed.

Hope that makes sense and helps.
*waves over at forum sig/title line* I try to give others the relevant info with a bit of humor. I'm not offended if someone uses a male pronoun to refer to me on the internet (it's not like they can see me or hear my voice), but I may correct them if I'm in the mood. It's as much a matter of courtesy towards others... I'd prefer that men not assume that I can fully understand certain aspects of their life because they think I share their "plumbing", when I don't. Similarly, I don't expect anyone who hasn't actually been pregnant to fully understand that whole experience.
Gender is irrelevant on a common hobby such as gaming, on online socializing, and how much enjoyment you draw from either or both. Correct anything that doesn't sit well with you, it is only the right and natural thing to do. No one will or should have a problem with that.

And who seriously believes that there are no female gamers???
Post edited December 04, 2014 by KiNgBrAdLeY7
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Crewdroog: So, is it better to correct or just say f- it and let people call you whatever they want? Guys, if people were calling you a girl (in a not mean way), would you correct them? Have you corrected them?
I tend to correct people if they obviously call me a guy. If it's a random "Thanks, dude!" I don't, because that's so generic these days. As I've gotten older, I have to say that sexism bothers me more and more, and the automatic assumption that gamer = guy is definitely that. Most of the time, I try to correct people with either a straightforward, "Nope, gal over here" sort of thing or a joke, because it really is the sort of thing that can set people off... but I'd rather irritate someone than have them assume for a year that my genitals involve dangly bits, because that annoys the hell out of me.

Not that I think genitals of any sort should have any part in gaming, but they obviously do, what with gamergate, tropes, etc. Those things are exactly why I've started caring about other people's assumptions. I've gamed since I was 10, and we're coming up nearly to three decades of it now and I'm proud of it, dammit. :P
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Luned: *waves over at forum sig/title line* I try to give others the relevant info with a bit of humor. I'm not offended if someone uses a male pronoun to refer to me on the internet (it's not like they can see me or hear my voice), but I may correct them if I'm in the mood. It's as much a matter of courtesy towards others... I'd prefer that men not assume that I can fully understand certain aspects of their life because they think I share their "plumbing", when I don't. Similarly, I don't expect anyone who hasn't actually been pregnant to fully understand that whole experience.
Man when my wife was pregnant she was crazy. All happy to have a kid with me then all of a sudden crying and eating and threatening to cut me if I don't bring chocolate home after work. I love our son but I think he is going to be an only child.
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Luned: *waves over at forum sig/title line* I try to give others the relevant info with a bit of humor. I'm not offended if someone uses a male pronoun to refer to me on the internet (it's not like they can see me or hear my voice), but I may correct them if I'm in the mood. It's as much a matter of courtesy towards others... I'd prefer that men not assume that I can fully understand certain aspects of their life because they think I share their "plumbing", when I don't. Similarly, I don't expect anyone who hasn't actually been pregnant to fully understand that whole experience.
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saith32: Man when my wife was pregnant she was crazy. All happy to have a kid with me then all of a sudden crying and eating and threatening to cut me if I don't bring chocolate home after work. I love our son but I think he is going to be an only child.
LOL Exactly! I grok being pregnant, you grok having to live with the pregnant. :)
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darthspudius: All this talk of wrong genders is making me listen to Goodbye Horses.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=64DsZSrCmok
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Crewdroog: lol. oh jason mewes....
The man is a comedic God! lol
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Crewdroog: So, is it better to correct or just say f- it and let people call you whatever they want? Guys, if people were calling you a girl (in a not mean way), would you correct them? Have you corrected them?
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penumbren: I tend to correct people if they obviously call me a guy. If it's a random "Thanks, dude!" I don't, because that's so generic these days. As I've gotten older, I have to say that sexism bothers me more and more, and the automatic assumption that gamer = guy is definitely that. Most of the time, I try to correct people with either a straightforward, "Nope, gal over here" sort of thing or a joke, because it really is the sort of thing that can set people off... but I'd rather irritate someone than have them assume for a year that my genitals involve dangly bits, because that annoys the hell out of me.

Not that I think genitals of any sort should have any part in gaming, but they obviously do, what with gamergate, tropes, etc. Those things are exactly why I've started caring about other people's assumptions. I've gamed since I was 10, and we're coming up nearly to three decades of it now and I'm proud of it, dammit. :P
dangly bits. lol

and I agree with the world "dude". it is genderless. I'll just start calling everyone dude ;) people will think I"m some dude from cali that surfs for a living. far out.
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Luned: *waves over at forum sig/title line* I try to give others the relevant info with a bit of humor. I'm not offended if someone uses a male pronoun to refer to me on the internet (it's not like they can see me or hear my voice), but I may correct them if I'm in the mood. It's as much a matter of courtesy towards others... I'd prefer that men not assume that I can fully understand certain aspects of their life because they think I share their "plumbing", when I don't. Similarly, I don't expect anyone who hasn't actually been pregnant to fully understand that whole experience.
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saith32: Man when my wife was pregnant she was crazy. All happy to have a kid with me then all of a sudden crying and eating and threatening to cut me if I don't bring chocolate home after work. I love our son but I think he is going to be an only child.
lol. Yeah, I'm never having kids... I'm crazy enough. :)
Post edited December 04, 2014 by Crewdroog
Having a kid is pretty cool to me. Yeah there's moments to where it can get frustrating but overall having a kid is awesome. For me anyways.
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Crewdroog: lol. oh jason mewes....
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darthspudius: The man is a comedic God! lol
I know. I haven't watched clerks 2 in so long I forgot that I saw it. When you posted I was like, "aw man, I never saw clerks 2". then I saw dante and was like, "oh god, I did see it!"
True story: Among other things, I am a preschool enrichment teacher (meaning a specialist that works part time). And about half the kids call me Mrs. instead of Mr., because in their worldview Missus means Teacher.

Of course, most of the five-year-olds know the difference, and are doing it to be sarcastic. I laugh it off, same as they do. There's no point in getting all bent out of shape at a youngster's sense of humor.

That last sentence also applies to the internet, btw. Since all trolls are 12-year-old boys, or might as well be.
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saith32: Having a kid is pretty cool to me. Yeah there's moments to where it can get frustrating but overall having a kid is awesome. For me anyways.
Yeah, I just never have had the desire for them. My maternal clock is broken or something. But, I'll be an awesome aunt! :) buy them toys that make the noise, stuff 'em full of candy then send them back to my sister.
Having it on your sig is not very good, IMO; since anyone no matter what gender should not have to display their gender where most others add a witty quote. In general, I think of people I meet on gaming forums as gamers and not gamer guys/girls. Ofc, its also part of using a false name because people don't know who you are and using one means you may be thought of as what the person seeing your profile thinks. But as far as an individual is concerned, I don't think you have to assert your gender. If I'm mistaken for a female, I won't bother to correct it every time someone says it, like its my duty to say I'm of a particular gender. In most cases, on online forums, people with intelligence and common knowledge that girls don't swear as much can deduce who are male or female after posting on that forum for around a month.
So if I were you, I wouldn't correct anyone who seemingly thinks I'm of a different gender all the time. Only if I see they're new (only in a passive way) since we're on the forums to express our opinions and have fun interacting with others. And there is little difference what gender a person one is on in such forums, so I don't think its worth bothering about.