orcishgamer: Sort of, "short bus" didn't seem that offensive to me until my child started riding one. When I was in my early 20s calling my friends "fag" didn't seem that offensive.
Sometimes you just get enough maturity and life experience to re-examine your assumptions. Sometimes you realize you were wrong and decide to change.
Navagon: The way I see it, there's not being offensive by means of your own initiative, like what you describe above, and then there's desperately trying to not appear offensive by adhering to the aforementioned Racist's Guide.
With PC you're still branding people by skin colour. Still sorting them out via a Dulux colour chart. Employing people according to their colour and giving yourself a pat on the back when you have enough of each category of person as per the way in which you pigeon-holed them.
In other words, it's the same shit but to a different end. The mentality is still very much there.
Not using terms like 'fag' because it doesn't sit right with you is completely different to insisting that someone be called African American when they've never once set foot in the US and other related retarded shit like that.
It's the difference between thinking and acting with a conscience and a blundering, clumsy attempt at faking it
which only really makes matters worse.
I will grant that sometimes PC (which itself I don't like as a term, as it seems to mostly serve as a catch all for "individual programs I don't like") can have some undesired results, if all it really is is a "bigots guide to try not to act like a bigot" and actual bigots are making an effort to use it, isn't that preferable to people just being unintentionally bigoted?
Why do we need to make efforts? Well, because certain things happened in the US, so we make certain efforts. Certain things happened in Germany, likewise they make certain efforts related to that.
All in all, affirmative action has shown positive results. Yes, some proponents are not pleasant people and even lie to promote their ideals, but truthfully that can be said for both sides so I'll simply judge the preferable "way" for society to go based on the merits I perceive. Not using terms that are offensive to others, even unthinkingly, is a good thing. Yes, you might not have meant it pejoratively, but if you realize that it can conjure up some awful demons in others the right thing to do is avoid it if possible. I'll admit I can be a hypocrite here as well, there's a few things I don't hold with and I don't know if it's my ignorance or the proponents really being unreasonable (e.g. rape culture seems bigoted and trigger warning sounds like a crutch in place of actual mental health treatment).
There's a very, very long discussion here, overall and even with the drawbacks, I have to prefer the culture that gives a crap enough to try. If we have a better way to deal with it, yes, let's do that. I don't see any alternatives offered that don't simply amount to, "don't do anything at all." We all know what the results were when we didn't do anything at all, we're trying to avoid that now, what sane reason do we have for thinking not doing anything at all will have different results in the future?