Give me height and weight

Ok, so how being hit on by other guys is bad for you?

I could understand that if you were a woman, because there are some creeps out there. But a guy? I'd rather take advantage of it by getting free beer.

It happens when i just sit there in the train for example... They just approach me... There once was that older guy who was sitting infront of me and told me how cute I am...O.o

I'm not sure about Germany, but around here you don't hit on random men or women if you're gay or lesbian. Things are generally safe, but it's incredibly inconsiderate, not to mention a waste of time and energy.

Sure, mistakes do happen from time to time, but I would never hit on a random man without knowing that he was at least bi. It just makes people uncomfortable.

At least women are used to being hit on by random men and are in a position to have experience dealing with it.

It is unusual here too... It is just me they are hitting on so aggressively it semms...just me...

True that. I only had a situation like that once, and only because I went to a gay bar with my gay friend. And obviously didn't have problem with some guy hitting on me, because that would be stupid.

I don't think it's THAT unusual. It used to happen to my husband all the time.

Well, if you go to a gay bar and nobody hits on you, I think that would be slightly insulting.

In general, I don't think there's much harm in being hit on if you're not interested, provided it's done in a respectful manner. I suspect that the convention is ore based upon practicality than anything else.

That reminds me, there's a guy I should respond to on my dating profile later today. No idea what I'm going to tell him, but who knows, the profile pic was kind of cute.

OP, do not worry, as others have articulated far better, the love life and relationship you desire, you will get it eventually.

And as a bloke, you do have advantages on your side. Women, who want to have kids and build a family often have to quickly start thinking of settling down, as our wombs come with an expiry date attached. For you, as a guy, from now till 50, it's all good.

I'd actually advise you, at this age, to explore life, fulfill your goals and have fun, smell the roses, or anything you wish, go out there more, just take those steps to knowing more people/women, and let love happen as it is.

Also, being round-ish, so to speak, is in no way a deal-breaker always. My cousin-in-law is in complete domestic bliss, with two jolly kids. He began his marriage bodily over-weight, and is still overweight now. He is a fun guy, but he isn't going to win any Pulitzer prizes in a speaking competition, isn't rich, and over 30. In fact, his wife's family is far richer than his (Courtesy of my Uncle-in-law, on my cousin's end. We are pretty much a middle-class family).

However, he is a family man, a kind soul and has his heart in the right places. Although, OP, if you are genuinely overweight, it'd be a good idea to lose some of it, *not* because of what society will think of you, but for your own health and body.

I can also empathize a lot about the confidence bit. At present, while I'm no super-model, I'm a very feminine kind of woman. Long hair, dresses, make-up, thin in body size, and thanks to the good side of my parents, I manage to stave off looking my age, but a short few years younger than that.

I'm not a straight woman though, but a lesbian who mostly dates other feminine women. When I was a year older than you are, I fell in love and thought I had found the "one". My ex-girlfriend, as it happens, was incredibly attractive, easily a 7-8 out a scale of 10. On the outside, things look perfect. Sometimes, it looks like we are a glittery sort of couple.

But years later, everything went kaput. I'm now almost hitting 30, single, and my confidence shot, wondering if I'd be able to find love again. It doesn't help that I'm kind of shy in reality. I'm not the sort who can walk away with a string of dates in one night.

Relationships, outside of romance and flowers, what matters most is dedication, sincerity and tons of heart, at least to me. It's far easier bedding someone outside your league, than finding someone who'd weather with you through *all* the bad days and not just good.

And I'd prefer to have the latter, a partner who sticks by you, than just flashy attributes.

I'll say, not that it makes things any easier, just more tiresome. The last time I went to a gay bar with a couple friends and got there before they did, I was the only woman there and one guy (who must have been at least 20 years older than me) went out of his way to tell me he was straight as he introduced himself. JFC.

On the other hand, women still hit on men very rarely.

It's expected from a man to do a first step. Actually, it's the only way to get to know any women outside your job environment - to approach them.

Err, no, it's the reverse.

First of all, men tend to be higher risk takers, which translates into a greater propensity to reckless behavior which leads to serious injury or death.

Married men takes fewer risk, because they need to take into account the effect their untimely death would have on their spouse (and children if they have any).

I can tell you for a fact that I take a lot fewer risks then my crazy single pals, because each time I look at a situation that could lead to a potential accident, I factor in the kind of effect it would have not just on me, but my long term gf as well.

Second, our current societal structure is anti-family.

We are career driven to the bone and if you are single, you have the most time to dedicate to your career.

More and more, we expect both persons in a couple to work full time, which is not very conductive to raising children as is readily observed by the declining birth rate in the Western world and heavy reliance on immigration (ok, there are other factors, but this is a significant one).

In many career paths, they will just look at your funny if you tell them you want to work part-time. For example, I don't know many programmers who work part time (I don't know any actually).

That's fine and dandy, but the harsh truth is that we need more kids.

I'm a liberal too, but at some point, I realize that we need a system that works and will lead to long term prosperity.

I'm part of the problem too: My gf doesn't want any kids and I love her to death, but in a way, I feel bad about it, cause I'm directly contributing to Western decline by obliging her and not having any.

I'm more of an undecided type as far as kids go. I could literally swing both ways and I knew all along that my decision regarding children would rest largely on what my partner would want.

I could find fulfillment in raising children, but I can also find fulfillment pursuing other ventures with the greater amount of time not having kids gives me.

Ultimately though, it would be better for society if I had kids.

I'd rather want someone to have kids as a service to society than because "all my friends have kids or are pregnant" or solely as an excuse to avoid working (one of my GF's colleagues actually did the latter, recently - she admitted that she just hated the job and needed pregnancy so her husband wouldn't get mad if she decided to quit).