Congrats on the numerical milestone! I'm in, hopefully for a copy of Nox. I'd settle for Deponia though.

Dude: Did you hear that Gandalf caught herpes?
Grude: He did? That's crazy, especially for a guy with his nose hair.
Dude: Tell me about it.
Grude: How did it happen anyway?
Dude: You know wizards. He got drunk waiting for his tour of the Death Star.
Grude: You don't get herpes from drinking.
Dude: Sure, you do. Guy went crazy and started doing everything. Fucking bears, boinked an elephant. A walrus might have gotten involved. I heard he even went to Slovenia looked for ass.
Grude: Dumb ass wizards always think they're indestructible.
Dude: You'd think a guy who'd been alive for so long would be smart enough to at least wear a rubber.
Grude: I got laid in a Slovenian marketplace once. The funny thing was that I was only looking to buy a mango.
Dude: You went to Slovenia to buy fruit?
Grude: I thought mango was black market code for a machine gun. It turns out that I was wrong, and it actually was a fruit stand!
Dude: At least you earned some frequent flier miles.
Grude: And my test came back negative. I was afraid I was gonna have to murder a bitch.
Dude: That's a clear victory.
Grude: Tell me about it.
Dude: Just don't fuck Gandalf.
Grude: Word.

First thanks :)
I will enter for a copy of Deponia

-Hey pal,have you bought the mango DLC from the marketplace for Star Wars:Build your own Death Star? It adds a new fruit in your fridge!
-Nope,I don't wanna feed these fucking bears giving them my money. They give me herpes every time I saw one of these "exclusive" DLC. They must be drunk to put out these things.
-But the last day you bought the machine gun DLC for Resident Evil 7!Why you blame Lucasarts for the mangon one?
-Because in RE7 there was an indestructible zombie elephant and I NEED a victory against him.No matter how much I must pay,but I MUST beat him.
-Pal,you are drunk.Seriously,from that time in Slovenia where you "met" that crazy woman with nose hair you are not the same person.
-Dude, you are right.But hey,this is the life.I can murder someone for a good DLC,but I continue to buy this crapphy add-on knowing they are horrible.I'm a bad person. I'm like Gandalf fighting the Balrog: I know I can't beat him,buu I try anyway.

To thousand more!

Most interested in:

Etherlords
S2
Rayman Forever
SimCity2000
Theme Hospital


Lord Vader: Who's incompetence has brought us to this out-of-reach system?! To this apparently stoneage puny planet called Dirt?!...
Corporal Madris: Earth, Sir.
Lord Vader: What?!
Corporal Madris: This planet is called Ea...agh...urggh...khhh.....
...
Lord Vader: You! Dispose of this.
Private Woon: Yes Lord Vader.
...
Lord Vader: ...How are we supposed to get the annual Death Star maintenance check-up here?! We have only 2 days left to send the renewed space flight permit to the RSU! Without the green light from them we will be grounded! And how am I then supposed to rule the universe?!
...
Lord Vader: Admiral Tasyk! Are you listening to me?!!
Admiral Tasyk: Yes my Lord. I entrusted my wife's nephew to make the appointment for the check-up.
Lord Vader: What are his usual duties? What is his evaluation rating?
Admiral Tasyk: He is with the cleaning crew and he also helps in the kitchen. My wife thought I should give him a more responsible job, Lord Vader. Umm, his rating is negative-X.
Lord Vader: You have put the safety of our Empire in the hands of a crazy errand boy who is to be Xterminated!?...
Admiral Tasyk: My wife made me do it Sir. He is not crazy though. He is an uncurable drunk, but he is not crazy my Lord.
Lord Vader: Do not interrupt me again or it will be the last thing you do! Since its my birthday, I will spare your miserable life for now...
Everyone: Happy Birthday Lord Vader!!
Lord Vader: Bring your nephew before me admiral, before I change my mind and introduce you with the Force!
Admiral Tasyk: Right away Lord. Lanis, get Billy Loonik on the line.
Sergeant Lanis: Yes Sir. ... He is on the line admiral.
Admiral Tasyk: Billy. Get up here immediately!
Billy Loonik: Hey uncle. Sure. Just let me finish preparing mangos for dinner first.
Admiral Tasyk: Now, Billy! Lord Vader wants to see you.
Billy Loonik: The guy who breathes funny? OK, I'm coming.
...
Admiral Tasyk: I apologise Lord Vader. Sometimes he speaks before he thinks.
...
Lord Vader: Captain Nawara. Where are we supposed to get maintenance check-up?
Captain Nawara: The place is called Slovenia, Lord Vader. But I am having trouble finding its exact location. It's writen here that it has a population of only two millions. I guess it is only a small village.
Lord Vader: Two million? Colonies of fucking bears are larger than that!
Captain Nawara: Uhm, yes Sir. Here is an addendum to Slovenia's profile. It says, look for a boot and a chicken.
Billy Loonik: Hey uncle Ian. So, whats the rush? Wow, is that Vader. Cool outfit dude! I wish I had one of these. Then I could hide my bloody nose hair. I shave them every six hours, but it grows so fast...
Admiral Tasyk: Show some respect in presence of Lord Vader you idiot! Lord Vader, this is my nephew.
Lord Vader: What is wrong with him? Look at his face!
Admiral Tasyk: He has a phew problems with herpes Sir. Doctors can't seem to cure him.
Lord Vader: Just keep him away from me...HERPES!!...I got it a month ago! Doctor Lanus said the food was infected with it! I'll squish you like an elephant into oblivion where you belong you rat!
Billy Loonik: Hahahahha, you're hilarious Vadey. Don't you know elephants are scared of mice and rats.
Lord Vader: You....
Admiral Tasyk: Lord Vader!! The check-up. If you kill him...
Lord Vader: ...we are finished. You have just earned your life back admiral.
Admiral Tasyk: Thank you Lord.
Billy Loonik: You didn't let him murder me uncle Ian, I knew you liked me. My mum was wrong when she said you wouldn't give a wookie's hair for me. I love you uncle Ian.
Admiral Tasyk: Shut up already, and don't make a sound until you are spoken to.
Billy Loonik: OK uncle.
Admiral Tasyk: Someone throw me into a rankor's pit.
Lord Vader: Loonik. We are now here in some forsaken system. We cannot do anything about it now, since our deadline is too close. I'll try to be optimistic and assume...
Billy Loonik: Hehehe, anyone knows what assume means? ... Uhm, sorry. Please carry on.
Lord Vader: ...you actually brought us here for a good reason. Now is your chance to speak.
Billy Loonik: Yes Lord Vader. I heard from a guy this is the best place to fix complex models and as you know it, there are no models more complex than this one you have.
Lord Vader: Where have you heard this information? Who told it to you? From what I can see and from what our sensors tell us, this is a planet with technology that is so outdated that there are no records in our database. Completely primitive compared to our civilization.
Billy Loonik: Well, one day I was hanging out in that bar on Tatooine. The....the Mos Eisley Cantina. You know, the one with really groovy music. I was playing a few games with some guys there and for the first time I was winning, and I was winning so much, i won everything. So much, the other players didn't have enough to pay out my winnings. Then one guy...what was his name...Gimli, Gamgee, Gandalf! Gandalf was his name. He apologised that they cannot pay and said if they can offer me anything they are selling in the Mos Eisley marketplace or offer me help with anything. I was thinking a little and then it hit me. I asked if they know anyone that could fix a large space ship model that I made. I lied a little, because I wanted to impress them. They talked among themselves for a while and then Gandalf said there is a guy, far, far, away that makes and fixes Bburagos, but can fix anything you can think off. He then arranged an appointment. Full service, for free with included beds and food. What luck! Right Sir?
Lord Vader: This long flight to nowhere was based on a word of some criminal?! I should cut you in half on the spot!
Billy Loonik: That wouldn't be a fair win Sir. I don't even have a light saber.
Lord Vader: Shut your hole before I make a few others next to it. Tell Captain Nawara how to find this Slovenia.
Billy Loonik: Did you look for the chicken yet?
Captain Nawara: The chicken, along with a boot, is mentioned in the notes, but we don't know what it means.
Billy Loonik: What it says. Look for a shape of a boot and a chicken.
...
Billy Loonik: Uncle! Uncle! Look there! Land in shape of a boot and next to it is the chicken! I did good Lord Vader right?
Lord Vader: What now. There is no further information.
Billy Loonik: We've got to find a man called Khangler. He lives in a place called Miribor. In the north-east part of the chicken.
Lord Vader: Admiral Tasyk. Take a party down to the planet and find that man. And take your nephew with you.
Admiral Tasyk: Me Sir? Shouldn't I be on the ship Lord Vader?
Lord Vader: Your life depends on succes of the mission. Do what you want, just find me Khangler.
Admiral Tasyk: Yes Lord.
...
Captain Nawara: Lord Vader. Admiral Tasyk is reporting they have found Miribor and they expect to locate Khangler shortly.
Lord Vader: Good. I'll be in my chambers until they return. Call me when they arrive.
Captain Nawara: Yes Sir.
...
Captain Nawara: Lord Vader. They have returned.
...
Lord Vader: Are you the one called Khangler?
Khangler: Yesh. Frenz Khangler. Ath you servich Sir. How can I be of assistance?
Lord Vader: We came to you because we have heard you are an expert in your field.
Khangler: Ouh yesh Sir. Youh have comhe tou teh reight place. I make and fixh anhy type of moudel kits youh can think of. From toys, to machin gunhs, to pod racers, to space shipsh. All mey work has a lifetime warranthy and I guaranthee that everything I fix will be even better than before. Practically indestructible!
Lord Vader: Did you say model kits?
Khangler: Of course. Whath else?
...
Swoosh! Crash! Aaaargh!! Klank! Kritz!! Bang! Slash!................
...
Lord Vader: Victory!!!!! I guess the stupid boy was wrong. Killing unarmed idiots felt great! Again ;)

I'm in for anything except Nox, because I already have it! (I'm especially interested in SimCity though!)

-Hey, Gandalf! Nice nose hair, it's looking pretty crazy today!
-Thanks, it's probably because of the crazy night I had in the marketplace at Slovenia last night...I was so drunk, lawlz!
-Hehe, wicked!
-Yeah dude! You should have been there, there was this elephant, and he kept shooting up at the Death Star with his machine gun! You really missed out, bro.
-Awww, man! Tell me you didn't murder anyone this time?
-Are you kidding? I murdered freaking everyone. I'm indestructible, man! I've been living with herpes for 200 years! I once swallowed a mango pit whole and didn't choke! I once killed 30 bears...with my bare hands! That was quite a victory for me.
-Damn, Gandalf...you're such a stud. Fucking bears, I hate those guys!
-Damn straight! I'm Gandalf, bitch!

Bumping through the snow, in a one bump open bump bump bump.

Deponia is the game I'm interested in.

--
Tony: Slovenia has to have one of the most crazy marketplace locations to visit, it's murder on me.
Johnnie: I know, Gandalf, these fucking bears gave herpes to my elephant while I was drunk...
Tony: You sure it wasn't the mango you got from the Death star cantina?
Johnnie: I'm not sure, but the nose hair on that machine gun was so indestructible we had nothing but victory all night long....
Tony: I think you're still drunk.
---

Rayman 3 and/or Theme Hospital, S2 would be nice too, I suppose.
Also, congratulations on the Milestone.

Bill: Mike, pass the chips, man.
Mike: Here.
Bill: Y'hear about Jeff?
Mike: Yeah, tough break.
Bill: You going to his funeral?
Mike: No way, man, the guy was fucking bears, man, it was only a matter of time 'til one of 'em wasn't gonna be asleep for it.
Bill: Yeah, he was crazy, for sure, when he was drunk, he always went on about how indestructible he was.
Mike: Well, he wasn't drunk, or indestructible in that scenario. The guy ended up like Ma Gnucci, only they weren't Polar Bears, and he didn't survive.
Bill: Who-- What?
Mike: Nevermind. The point I'm trying to make is he had to be sober for something like that, which means he knew what he was doing, which makes him a nutjob, we act like we knew him, I can only foresee dirty looks, people'd be thinking I'm cornholing elephants with an assortment of multicolored sporks.
Bill: How would that even work?
Mike: Nevermind, all I'm saying is I think we'd both be best off staying away.
Bill: Yeah, maybe you're right. Is Victory Road on yet?
Mike: No, man, I said it was on at 9.
(Mike sneezes)
Mike: Agh, god.
Bill: Again? You got Hay fever?
Mike: Nah, I got this one nose hair, longer than the others, no joke, sometimes when I inhale, it goes way up in there, and it itches like hell, then, I sneeze.
Bill: Why don't you cut it? Damn near blew over my Death Star bong.
Mike: Then get it off the table, genius, you don't even use it.
Bill: I know, man, but come on, the fact that a bong like that exists, I gotta flaunt it. Just like that one shaped like that funky machine gun in Metal Gear Solid 2, it's sick.
Mike: The P90?
Bill: Yeah, that one, I tell ya, that time Sheila came over, I put on a ski-mask, had that bad boy pointed right at her. Gave her a hell of a scare, screaming murder! murder! at the top of her lungs, scared the hell outta that nudist granny in the apartment next door.
Mike: You're crazy.
Bill: Anyway, you gonna trim that long fucker? Your nose is gonna need a fellowship like Gandhi, man.
Mike: Wha-- You mean Gandalf?
Bill: Yeah, whatever.
Mike: Well, it's not nearly long enough for that, but, yeah, I guess, you gonna come to the marketplace with me? I need some clippers.
Bill: Nah, man. I'm banned from there.
Mike: Wha?
Bill: Remember? That time I had herpes, I stuck my thumb in a mango, or two, or three, and just left them there.
Mike: Sick, how'd they know it was you?
Bill: They had me on camera with my hand in my pants right before I did it.
Mike: Leaving alone herpes, I'd ban you based on the pocket pool playing, how'd you get herpes again?
Bill: Probably that hooker in Slovenia,
Mike: Which one?
Bill: The one with the eyepatch and the bullet holes.
Mike: Oh, right, and you didn't wrap the captain, genius.
Bill: Shut up, man. If that was natural, I'd have been born with latex attached to it.
Mike: In any case, with that outrageous revelation, I'm gonna head to the marketplace, I'll be back sometime before 9 to explain everything that is wrong with what you just said.
Bill: Later, man.

Thanks for the giveaway Titanium. I'd like to enter for all but Theme Hospital, Nox, and SimCity 2000.

Bob: What's wrong Doug? You don't look very happy.
Doug: I had a bad day at the marketplace where I work. This crazy drunk dressed as Gandalf runs in waving a machine gun!! He had nose hair as long as an elephant's trunk I swear!
Bob: Wow!! What the hell happened?
Doug: He was shouting bloody murder, and claiming he was indestructible. Yelling and claiming victory for the Death star! What a wackjob!
Bob: Yeah. That definitely beats the news I had.
Doug: Oh? What's going on with you?
Bob: Just found out I have herpes, and the sore I have is the size of a mango!
Doug: Ugggh...that's gross!
Bob: Yep. Got it while fucking bears back in Slovenia.

:-P

Mysterious Person 1: Our factories in Slovenia make indestructible copies of Death star as fast as drunk machine gun operator runs out of bullets.
Mysterious Person 2: With this that crazy Gandalf wannabe and his fucking bears won't be able to annoy us like herpes anymore.
Mysterious Person 1: To assure our total victory I also created plans of mango powered elephant rider, he will totally murder his bears.
Mysterious Person 2: How will we get enough mango for that unit?
Mysterious Person 1: By exchanging nose hair, given to us by our dark deity, on marketplace.

-Man, fucking Bears got lucky again. They can't seem to lose games when Cutler is healthy enough to play.
-True that! When you gonna realize that Cutler is like Gandalf. He creates magic where there is none. The bad guys have no chance at victory.
-I knew you were a nerd but not everything can be explained with a bad fantasy novel metaphor.
-You still drunk aren't you? The Hobbit is one of the best books out there, a true classic.
-Whatever, I'm not getting into this with your crazy ass again. I'm thisclose to committing your murder as it is.
-Oh yah, just like to see you try. I'm as indestructible as the Death Star.
-Um, Luke Skywalker destroyed that not once, but twice. Pretty damn destructible if you ask me.
-Oh sure, mock The Hobbit but Star Wars is ok, huh?
-Not really, regretted it as I was saying it. But as long as you brought it up and we're talking about murder, I wouldn't mind machine gunning Lucas for what he did that to that franchise. Or maybe an elephant gun - yah, that would leave no traces of him and I couldn't get convicted if they can't identify his body.
-Dude, whats the deal with all the violent thoughts? The Bears game couldn't have affected you that much?
-Well no, I got the results back from my doctor this morning.
-And....???
-You remember the chick I went out with last weekend?
-The one with the huge mangoes?
-Melons...we call them melons here.
-Mangoes, melons, same thing...as long as they aren't kumquats. Am I right?
-Sure, whatever, you Slovakians need to understand American lingo better especially being in this country for as long as you have.
-Slovenian! How many times do I have to tell you, I am from Slovenia and am a Slovenian. Slovakians are from...well, doesn't matter. I can't believe you still don't know where I'm from after all this time.
-Can we get back on topic here? I was just joking anyways since its so funny how upset you get when I say Slovakia. I can literally see steam coming out of your ears.
-Well, quit doing it cuz next time I'm liable to pull out your nose hairs one by one till you get it right. Finish your story already, I gotta get to the marketplace before it closes. What the doctor say? You got herpes from her or something?
-To be continued....if there is another giveaway like this with different words :D

Fun contest Titanium....some of my references were regarding American football where there is a team called the Chicago Bears so maybe those not from here may not fully understand but you can substitute the team name for the name of your favorite team and Cutler for a player on that team.

Gonna try my luck with Nox and if not available, Theme Hospital or Sim City 2000. Thanks!

Congratulations in your four-digits reputation, Titanium! :)

Although I would love to enter the contest for the Deponia games, I won't, because I've already won some games lately thanks to this community (two games yesterday!). But, I wanted to say thanks for your awesome generosity, and +1 to you! ;)

Good luck everybody!! :D

Congrats on your milestone and +1, though I don't think you need it!

;)

I'd like to enter for Nox.

My dialogue:

Stormtrooper 1 - "Hey, did you hear Gandalf is going to visit the Death Star again?"
Stormtrooper 2 - "No way! He rocks! Last time he came we had a crazy, drunk time that ended with me trying to hit those fucking bears with a mango."
Stormtrooper 1 - "Dude, I remember that! We went to the marketplace on the lower levels to get the mango. Those bears wanted to murder you."
Stormtrooper 2 - "Yea, but I'm an indestructible mofo. I have the reflexes of an elephant and the power of a machine gun."
Stormtrooper 1 - "What's an elephant?"
Stormtrooper 2 - "Basically a dewback without the beard."
Stormtrooper 1 - "Speaking of dewbacks, did they find those missing droids yet?"
Stormtrooper 2 - "Don't think so. They were checking on some remote planet. I forgot the name...Slovenia? No, Tatooine. Yes, that's it. Tatooine!"
Stormtrooper 1 - "You ever been there? It sucks. I even got herpes at a brothel in Mos Eisley."
Stormtrooper 2 - "Is that why you trimmed your nose hair?"
Stormtrooper 1 - "No, it was to celebrate the victory of my son's podrace."
Stormtrooper 2 - "Oh."

A: Hey there, small world isn't it?
B: Hi, just doing some shopping. So how's it going?
A:This marketplace sucks, I never find anything I need.
B: What are you looking for?
A: Some fruit. I got drunk last night and I'm kind of hung over today, I could murder for some fruits.
B: You just stepped in one.
A: Eww what is it.
B: Looks like a half eater mango
A: I've never eaten mango, wonder how it is.
B: Taste it.
A: Are you crazy? Last thing I need now is a herpes infection.
B: Oh come one are you that afraid of a little fruit? You used to do all sorts of crazy stuff in school. You're as indestructible as the Death Star.
A: The Death Star blew up.
B: Oh, I guess I never watched that movie till the end. I think I stopped watching when Gandalf falls in the big pit.
A: That's another movie.
B: Oh, damn. What are you some movie expert! The point was you being afraid of a little mango. You used to do crazier things when we were kids. Remember that trip to Slovenia? You were wild back then. We got drunk in that bar and you started shooting random people with your toy water machine gun and yelling "Look, more fucking bears!", and then when you got the biggest guy in the place you yelled "Victory!".
A: Yeah... I got punched in the face after that and passed out.
B: We managed to wake you up pretty fast.
A: Yeah... you pulled out my nose hair with a pair tweezers until I woke up.
B: I thought we had fun.
A: Well I bet you did. I think I'm gonna lay off the drinking for a while. I gotta find some nice and relaxing hobby, I'm getting old. Maybe I'll go to the zoo and look at the elephants.
B: Well whatever, see you later.
A: Yeah... don't count on it.



I love reading these posts. Thanks for the awesome giveaway. If I get picked I'll go for Rayman 2.

Neat idea. I'll shoot for Rayman Forever.
M = Me; T=Titanium

M: So, I heard you hit the four star milestone and even made a giveaway in order to celebrate. That's pretty crazy commitment to a single site; you sure you weren't drunk when you came up with the idea?
T: I wish I was...the thing is, I didn't made the giveaway. You're not going to believe this...but it was Gandalf who did it.
M: G-g-Gandalf? What...?
T: Yeah, you heard me right. Some time ago, he came via Death Star to live here and he's spread nothing but chaos while he's been here. Must be something in the mangos he's constantly eating; you know, us locals know better not to eat Slovenian mangos. Or it could be that genital herpes I heard he developed after boning Slovenia's finest the other day.
M: But why did he come to Slovenia? Of all the shitty places to live in, why come there?
T: First of all, don't insult my motherland or I will unleash fucking bears upon you. We've got lots of them - you don't want to try your luck. But to answer your question - honestly, I don't know. All I know is that he's here, right in my house actually as we speak, and he's being a real nuisance. I think he's plain and simple gone over the edge. It's driving me nuts, and I just want to murder him by strangling him using his own nose hair.
M: All right all right, I'm sorry. Still...this whole thing sounds really weird. Like, why strangle him with nose hair? Wouldn't something like, a machine gun, be much more efficient?
T: Hah, you wish bro. that won't do shit against him: I tried (yeah, we have lots of those too on top of the bears). For some reason he's completely indestructible; I think he's cast some sort of immunity spell on him. But I will find a way and have a victory over him. This I swear: I'm done having him impose as me and coming up with these goddamn giveaways, it's costing me a ton of money. Mark my words, one day he will fall, or may ten thousand elephants trample over me.
M: Uh-huh...well, that's cool and all, but I'm afraid there's something I have to tell you.
T: Huh? What?
M: This has all been a ruse to utter all the keywords in the giveaway. I'm sorry to say I don't give two shits about your problem with Gandalf. Now, get your ass to the marketplace and buy me the Rayman Forever you owe me.
T:....fuck.