I'd teach them Candlejack.

Oh god n

I really love it, definitely rate it as one of my top games. I highly value storytelling and choice, and it's excellent at that, and the management-y stuff is well-done as well. Also great art and music.

I will be ending the giveaway around 10:00 PM EST, so get those entries in.

I would open a BARBer shop with them.

thanks!

My tribe would be a nomadic band known as the Ayell (known in some tongues as the A-Beckon, Aholler and sometimes Acry). By day, we would be regular ordinary, stinky barbarians who hit things with pointy sticks. By night, the elite of the tribe would sneak into other tribe camps and stand for a moment before asking a silly question; "JOKES?", "START OVER YOUR TENT?", "WHAT MAKES GOOD INITIATION RITUAL?".

They would do this so the opposing tribes would spend the night bickering, and by the time they got to wondering just why they followed through the discussion, the Ayell would charge in and hit them with pointy sticks.

As a strong female leader of a group of "rowdy" barbarians I would start a campaign, showing the barbarian culture in a new more favorable light perhaps hire a PR firm and start using a catch phrase "Barbarians..,. not the same ol horde"

Bring the world a new softer barbarian horde... one that pillages you with care and understanding.

Thanks for the giveaway, Gazoinks!

With a more evolved bunch, I would teach to them the subtleties of diplomacy, but since you force me to work with a group of barbarians ...

... I would teach Klingon martial arts and the Vulcan nerve pinch to them, which will become an unstoppable force that would conquer all other tribes. Once unified in one mighty horde come in conquering neighboring countries and then the whole planet (the more stubborn enemy leaders and dissidents would be "persuaded" by mind-meld).

When this was done I would teach the natives inner peace & logic, direct the progress of science to the level necessary to create the warp drive (us, Vulcans, have a very long life, you know) and request membership in the Federation.

It's the most logical way. ;)

I would call together all of the other barbarian tribes and convince them to join under my banner.
I would claim the honor and title of High Chieftain. After I had either convinced or forced all the tribe leaders to join under my banner, I would begin training them, and I would tell none of my warriors about my plans.
In a few months, we would march to war. We would arrive at the gates of Waterdeep where I would call the horn of battle, ordering every barbarian from every tribe to attack.
We would all get slaughtered by their mages, and then when I was the last remaining warrior I would call to my god, "Uthgar, I have done as you commanded, take my soul and let me join you!" before a wizards lightning bolt would drain the last life force from my body.

<--- Dork! :P
This is in case a newbie may enter this, if not then you got a free story! Thanks. :)

I'd command everyone to dance around aggressively in only loin cloths in order to intimidate whoever happened to be watching... animals mostly. Then the animals would join in (also wearing loin cloths by this point). Soon, the world would be conquered.

I would have them travelling the land and performing as an interpretive dance troupe

I would crush my enemies, see them driven before me and hear the lamentation of their women!

Down to the wire: Around 3 hours left!

If I were the leader of a tribe of rowdy barbarians, I would try to help them find new careers. Pillaging isn't exactly a good way to survive in this day and age, and surly some of them would be interested in peaceful professions like pottery making or accounting. For the ones that refuse to assimilate, I'll just send them off to some Buddhist temple or circus.

A winner is you! Check your PMs! I enjoy the image of an expansionist tribe of Bardbarians. Plus I played a Bardbarian once in D&D, and I'm a music nerd so yeah. :)

Great entries all around, though. If I had the funds I'd giveaway multiple copies.