Posted December 23, 2012
Holiday Sale Day 12: Ultima Series</a>
Thank you, thank you. Be sure to tip your waitress. Great to be here and tell you a few jokes to support [url=http://www.gog.com/promo/ultima_series]today's incredible offer. I just flew in from Brittania for this show and let me tell you: my arms are killing me! Apparently--and I didn't know this--you aren't supposed to drop your trousers when you get near a moongate. A name like that--who knew? I went out drinking the other night and it occurs to me that drinking is the perfect way to show all of the Virtues: you show honor by paying your tab, compassion by tipping the barkeep, honesty because "in vino veritas", justice by taking a cab home, sacrifice by giving up your brain cells for virtue, valor by drinking your whiskey neat, humility by leaving the bar on your hands and knees, and spirituality when you beg the gods tomorrow morning to kill you!
:: rimshot ::
Three priestesses are sitting in a park one day eating ice cream. One is licking the ice cream, the other is sucking the ice cream, and the third is biting the ice cream. Which one worships the Goddess of Beauty? What's that? The one who's licking the ice cream? No, its the one named Kylista, but I like the way you think!
:: rimshot ::
What kind of warrior is a friend of loud noises? It's obviously a guy who likes to charge into battle, towing a bunch of pots and pans behind him on a string. What kind of fool would ask what's a pal of din?
:: rimshot ::
A wizard wearing a robe with the letters VAS FLAM stencilled on it front walks into a bar and the bartender points at the wizard's chest and says, "Hey, we have a drink named after that!" The wizard looks puzzled and says, "You've got a drink called an 'Itchy Robe'?"
:: rimshot ::
But seriously, folks, today sees a crazy sale of all of the games in the Ultima series--that's Ultima 1 + 2 + 3, Ultima 4 + 5 + 6, Ultima 7, Ultima 8, Ultima 9, and Ultima Underworld 1+2, all for just $8.94! If you're looking for a chance to play what is arguable the most influental cRPG series ever made--and get it on the cheap!--now's the time to pick it up. The sale is only good for 24 hours, so that means you need to embark on your quest to play all of the Ultima games by 24 December 2012 at 14:59 GMT or be cursed to a life of virtueless squalor.
Oh, and before I go, one last joke: How many Vorz does it take to skup a light-sphere?
None — Vorz cannot skup, dinglenoggen!
:: rimshot ::
(one of the jokes on this page shamelessly stolen from here)
Thank you, thank you. Be sure to tip your waitress. Great to be here and tell you a few jokes to support [url=http://www.gog.com/promo/ultima_series]today's incredible offer. I just flew in from Brittania for this show and let me tell you: my arms are killing me! Apparently--and I didn't know this--you aren't supposed to drop your trousers when you get near a moongate. A name like that--who knew? I went out drinking the other night and it occurs to me that drinking is the perfect way to show all of the Virtues: you show honor by paying your tab, compassion by tipping the barkeep, honesty because "in vino veritas", justice by taking a cab home, sacrifice by giving up your brain cells for virtue, valor by drinking your whiskey neat, humility by leaving the bar on your hands and knees, and spirituality when you beg the gods tomorrow morning to kill you!
:: rimshot ::
Three priestesses are sitting in a park one day eating ice cream. One is licking the ice cream, the other is sucking the ice cream, and the third is biting the ice cream. Which one worships the Goddess of Beauty? What's that? The one who's licking the ice cream? No, its the one named Kylista, but I like the way you think!
:: rimshot ::
What kind of warrior is a friend of loud noises? It's obviously a guy who likes to charge into battle, towing a bunch of pots and pans behind him on a string. What kind of fool would ask what's a pal of din?
:: rimshot ::
A wizard wearing a robe with the letters VAS FLAM stencilled on it front walks into a bar and the bartender points at the wizard's chest and says, "Hey, we have a drink named after that!" The wizard looks puzzled and says, "You've got a drink called an 'Itchy Robe'?"
:: rimshot ::
But seriously, folks, today sees a crazy sale of all of the games in the Ultima series--that's Ultima 1 + 2 + 3, Ultima 4 + 5 + 6, Ultima 7, Ultima 8, Ultima 9, and Ultima Underworld 1+2, all for just $8.94! If you're looking for a chance to play what is arguable the most influental cRPG series ever made--and get it on the cheap!--now's the time to pick it up. The sale is only good for 24 hours, so that means you need to embark on your quest to play all of the Ultima games by 24 December 2012 at 14:59 GMT or be cursed to a life of virtueless squalor.
Oh, and before I go, one last joke: How many Vorz does it take to skup a light-sphere?
None — Vorz cannot skup, dinglenoggen!
:: rimshot ::
(one of the jokes on this page shamelessly stolen from here)
