I doubt the citizenship of those guys in line ahead of me. Any true Arstotzkan knows that our jokes are no laughing matter. After all, in Soviet Arstotzka we burn our jokes for heat.

In soviet Arstotzka, all currency is virtual which is great the crime rate has drastically reduced, until the power goes out and then when it does all monies transfer back to the state....

Thankyou for your kindness been interested in this since hearing about it a few weeks ago!
cookie anyone? yes? well ill need to see your papers before handing one of these over im afraid.

In America, you cut school. In Soviet Arstotzka, school cut you!

Lucky citizen will be chosen in 4h, so it's the last chance to send your application.

maggotheart is the lucky winner.

Rest of the participants will be placed in Gulags for their unfunny jokes about our glorious country.

In Arstzotka, Gulag is placed in you!

I am winner! As new official Arstotzka comedian, all citizens will report for funny hour 0500 to learn mandatory homeland laughing. Note: Failing for funny hour is much more healthy beatings!

What did lazy, stinking capitalist say to other lazy, stinking capitalist? Nothing! His hands too fat to use cell phone! Haha! For Arstotzka!

In communist Arstotzka, even Chuck Norris needs a proper passport, valid permit, correct seal, appropriate stamp, matching passphoto, correct issue location, right serial number, matching gender and a nice inspector to get through the border.

[edit]
And has to show up in time as well... *giggles*

Congrats to maggotheart and thanks again, Aver!