I get it!

5 stars means when you get hit by the game in the head you may see five stars rolling

Read. The. Reviews.

Evidently people find Chuck Barris offensive as well. XD
Thank god I didn't insinuate that Chuck Barris was from West Virginia. Shit, I would have been kicked out of the forum.

Do any of you know who Chuck Barris is? I'm curious if anyone got the joke. You see Chuck hosted a popular show called the Gong Show which was kind of like American Idol only with Idol they get some actual good singers on the show. The Gong Show was all just crap and when the performance got unbearably bad the judges rang a gong and had the performer yanked off stage. The joke here being that seeing Chuck introduce a performer meant the performer was going to be terrible thus insinuating that if Chuck were to introduce a game then the game would be terrible. Get it?

As for West Virginia, allow me to explain that as well. Someone earlier posted that giving 5 stars or 100% to a game doesn't work because you might later on find a game that was even better, then what do you give that one? My gag was that when they named West Virginia were they worried that they wouldn't know what name to use if they went even further west.

If you need I'll be back with pie charts and graphs later on for the slow people. :D

I always viewed 5 stars kind of like grades.

5- A: This is an excellent game! There are no spelling errors, it plays flawlessly, it is greatly entertaining, it has multiple things that make it stand a cut above other games. I highly recommend this game.

4 - B: This is a good game! It plays well, there are very few minor bugs (a texture doesn't render quite right, a table is positioned an inch or two above the ground, that kind of thing) and a bare handful of typos (like 3 in the entire game). This game is solidly in the top of it's class for it's genre. If you like this kind of game, you should play it. I approve of this game.

3 - C: This is an okay game. It launches with minor tweaks. It runs well once the initial baggage has been dealt with. This game is not remarkable, there is nothing that stands out. The plot is forgettable, the characters are cardboard, the music is non-invasive but also just kind of meh. This game may be missing some key components, it has no tutorial and it really needs one, that kind of thing. Play this game if you want to kill an hour or two and don't mind being bored. This game had promise, but it simply couldn't deliver.

2 - D: This is a bad game. This game has serious errors. This game requires three hours of hassle just to get it to run. And then it requires constant maintenance to keep it running. This game has bugs, lots of them. Alternatively, this game launched okay; however, the controls were abysmal, I got sea-sick while playing it, the dialogue was horrible, the plot made zero sense, this game is simply bad.

1 - F: You should not play this game, you should burn it. Buyer beware. I have zero pleasant things to say about this game. The music sounds like a jack-hammer mating with a rabid squirrel. No-one can get the fps above 11. The game is so bad content-wise that afterwards I am actually angry I played it. This is one of the worst of it's genre. You have been warned.

one of the first things you learn about games is that you can't trust any review.
if i read a review in a mag my first check is who wrote it, do i know the reviewer so i can trust him.
than if the games looks interesting i read as many reviews as possible.
reviews from users are different. i don't read the 5 or 1 stars...i seek for the reviews with
3 stars cause they are the most accurate ones.
a 5 star means for me: if you are even remotely interested into that genre this game is
a must play....and there are very few that falls into that category.

You can keep the charts and graphs, I want the pie though.

Every once in a while I find a problem with the five-star system - there is very seldom a way to give a rating of 0 stars (what if I think it's so bad it doesn't deserve a star? I could "not rate it at all", but that of course doesn't show the item as rated and doesn't affect the average). Then again, I think a star is good, two is better, and five is incredible (for "bad" ratings there should be another symbol, or negative numbers if using that).

Me too. They tend to be quite descriptive what and why the writer liked and disliked something. Especially on Metacritic (5-7).

Also approved by me.

That settles it.

Indeed, if only a retired Jedi were here. Removing a few clicking arms might solve the situation once and for all.

I don't think Jedi retire. Can you imagine that? Hanging out in some resort down in Florida playing shuffle board without moving a muscle.

They don't retire? Then what was Obi-Wan doing living alone in the desert? What was Yoda doing as the only "intelligent" being on a whole swamp planet? Well, probably eating shrooms and enjoying "visions" but during his retirement! The *only* actual jedi in the original trilogy were in fact retired.