No no, FidoNet is where it's happening!

i'm here to pick up the re... I mean bones.O yes there they all.[hands judas a bag of coins]
There your gold and i will now take these bones.
Its going to be fun turning these bones in to new minions.

I'm surprised how well these forums turned out. Many attract either crummy people, or bring the worst out of people. And many moderators do their job very poorly or try to cultivate a cult-like following, which is just creepy as hell. Especially between adults. GOG's is one of the few forums I've been to that seems both fairly problem-free and very open. That combo especially is hard to pull off, since it requires the voluntary goodwill of so many people, including the mods.

I'm too skinny to even need a dexterity roll.

There is more then one way to kill what ever it is you are.

I'd like to consider myself a teenage boy who hasn't smoked his brains to ashes, leaving only a cold empty shell of a skull. =D
Also, ummm..........Can I PLZZZZZZZ join?

I think we still have few minion level jobs that you can do. First we need to find out a few things about you.
1:Do you hate paladins.
2:have you ever done or plan a evil act.
3:Have you ever lead minions in to battle.
4:do you kill things with magic or weapon
5:how do you feel about working side by side with undead,goblins,drow,and other races we may have as minion.

1: Yes, be he was drunk and pissed me off...I killed a Templar in Crusades.
2: Yeah, all the time. I love putting live grenades in peoples pockets, burning whole villages, and just slaughtering people for no apparent reason.
3: Yes, and I believe when you were alive you WERE one of them.
4: Both, a magical weapon. Or intense amounts of lighting, disease clouds, and locusts.
5: Goblins are dumb as shit (why do you employ them??? Fodder?), Drows are pretty nice, and everything else I can deal with or just kill.
*Submitting.*

Yes i think we can find a use for you.
welcome new minion.
Now all we need you to do is to fill out these payroll forums.

I would like to payed in plates of Chicken Fajita Nachos, and once a week, a free dinner at Texas Roadhouse. Oh, and 1 platinum per 2 weeks. Those are my demands.

all right deal.
now for your first task.A leader of outpost we don't have much use for right now just die.
you will take his place.
[uruk hands rohan a map]
there a map that will tell you how to get to the outpost form here.
To make sure you don't die on the way die.10 goblins,6 skeletons lead by a cleric goblin,a kobold trap maker,and a orc ranger will be your guards.
Once there someone will tell you about everything you need to know .

*Switches Cleric for a lesser necromancer* Are you mad man?
*walks to outpost, but not before slaughtering a whole farming community and summoning an army of 500 chickens and various farm animals.*

That is truly clucked up, now get a moove on and stop horsing around . . . =)
Edit: And don't be so sheepish from here on, you're a necromancer in training, think big!

minion459695:Master!
me:What is it?
minion459695:your new minion send back the cleric you send with them and took one of the nercomaners form the necromaner school you happen to run.
me:and the big deal is beside no magic healing?
minion459695:..
me:Now get the hell out unless you have something useful to report.
minion459695:yes master.
[at the outpost]
koboldcaptaindeath:Welcome rohan to outpost greenwood.
koboldcaptaindeath:here a few magic item that used to belong to are last leader.
koboldcaptaindeath:a magic belt of healing and a few other weak magic items.
koboldcaptaindeath: yes i am a kobold you can stop asking that now.
koboldcaptaindeath:the outpost has 150 men here. made up of mostly goblins,some kobolds ,a orge and 6 trolls.
koboldcaptaindeath:Now for big stuff we deal with here at the outpost. a blood mage move here and build a tower not to long ago.been summoning only imps so far.we fear they may summon more powerful demons soon and over run the outpost.
koboldcaptaindeath:there a cave of orcs that attack us form time to time. there starting to get brave again they may attack us soon.
koboldcaptaindeath:the last of the big threats is a tribe of hobgoblins.all talks with them have end up with the messager dead or left dieing on the road some were.
koboldcaptaindeath:one last thing form time to time we get reports of elven rangers in the woods.
koboldcaptaindeath:that is all sir.we a wait your orders.