TheCycoONE: I was actually thinking of a specific book. The idea as basically that when a man goes out with a new woman his biggest fear is being laughed at - when a woman goes out with a new man her biggest fear is being raped/killed. (Aha, found it: Gavin De Becker: The Gift of Fear)
Yumi: isn't it laughed at when you take your pants off? :) well, when you go out with a new chick, she might put something in your drink when you're not looking, and then later do nasty things. or be a creepy stalker that will make your life miserable. or when you go to her place (or just around the corner) some brutes she was working with might get you and then sell your organs. heck, when you're walking in the street the person just passing by might pull out a gun and start shooting. or you might be standing in front of a store and a flower vase might fall on your head and kill you (true story). you don't think about those things or assume the worst, else you'd never leave your house again, or end up in an asylum. before you got married, when you went out with women, did you fear you might be laughed at each time? you don't go out with a person that you think might be like that. as for complete strangers that nobody knows, well, you shouldn't trust people you don't know, so you go to a public place where there are other people. unless they're thoroughly brainwashed with media drivel/propaganda and fucked up upbringing in a fucked up society, women do not feel like poor, weak, spineless, pathetic damsels in distress that need to fear every single thing and can't do shit themselves.
As a teenager, sure I had a fear of rejection that stopped me from asking out anyone I thought was too much 'better' than me. Eventually I got rejected and dumped a couple times and didn't care any more.
My point though was that there is a big fearmongering campaign in the media and schools in North America about date rape targeted at women. I'm sure most women don't let it paralyse them, but it must have some effect to be told over and over that you're in danger.