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General discussion (archive)angry dad - would you do the same?(180 posts)(180 posts)
(180 posts)
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This is my favourite topic
Posted February 10, 2012
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kl1ujzRidmU

I think in some parts he was overreacting but overall I agree.
Posted February 10, 2012
If he bought the laptop, he just wasted a butt load of money.
If his daughter bought the laptop, destruction of private property.

There's some weirdness around this video as well. I guess the guy's supposed to be a ranch owner. The daughter does sound oddly overworked, but the father sounds reasonable for most of these chores once he's actually going through the list.

Still, he sounds like my father. The issue is that I have no idea who's right, I've no idea how much either actually does. I can't pick a side because truth be told, there's no way to tell who's overreacting, if they both aren't, and there's no way to tell who's being honest, if they both aren't. Something I did notice that was a bit weird though.... How did he know how many bullets were left in the gun? (Before the last shots he says "I got two left") I don't handle guns, but I thought you couldn't see what's in your clip without pulling it out.
Posted February 10, 2012
That was pretty funny. He didn't do anything wrong as far as I saw.
Posted February 10, 2012
I think he lost the chance at coming across as rational when he shot the computer. There's a point where every teenager is rebellious. You make the choice of how to handle that. I don't know both sides (and even seeing the daughter's letter doesn't tell me everything), but I think this could have, and should have been handled a lot better then he did. He proved that he was just as childish as his daughter.
Posted February 10, 2012
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QC: How did he know how many bullets were left in the gun?
I do not know much about weapons but maybe this gun has some display as in Alien Pulse Rifle? http://cdn.walyou.com/wp-content/uploads//2010/11/Aliens-Pulse-Rifle-1.jpg :D
Post edited February 10, 2012 by Lexor
Posted February 10, 2012
Hmm, while I agree he was justified in his anger, shooting the laptop was ridiculous. He should have just taken the hard drive and RAM out and given it back to her.
Posted February 10, 2012
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SirPrimalform: Hmm, while I agree he was justified in his anger, shooting the laptop was ridiculous. He should have just taken the hard drive and RAM out and given it back to her.
Or just give whole laptop to charity. :P Yes, a little overreacting here.
Posted February 10, 2012
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SirPrimalform: Hmm, while I agree he was justified in his anger, shooting the laptop was ridiculous. He should have just taken the hard drive and RAM out and given it back to her.
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Lexor: Or just give whole laptop to charity. :P Yes, a little overreacting here.
Maybe I'm soft, but I wouldn't do something I couldn't undo in case I had a change of heart.
Posted February 10, 2012
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Lexor: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kl1ujzRidmU

I think in some parts he was overreacting but overall I agree.
Assuming that neither his statements or the ones from his daughter's message are blatant lies, I can understand his disappointment, but think he chose a poor way of showing it. He comes across as very nervous and a bit insecure while trying to demonstrate authority, which clearly fails. Furthermore, the "solution" he has chosen is rather immature: destruction of property, punishment, and trying to counter public defacement with another public defacement. He doesn't appear to have any clear strategy to actually solve the underlying conflict, he's just extremely disappointed and angry and couldn't find a better reaction than directing his anger against the laptop as a means of punishing his daughter. Such an immature reaction is something I'd expect from a kid or a teenager, but not from a grown-up. The only thing he "achieves" is publicly throwing mud at his own daughter (be it justified or not), coming across as ... strange, and giving the impression that this family needs help. Nothing in his actions will have any positive effect on his daughter's behavior.

If his daughter inherited his skills at conflict resolution, then I can see why it's not working.

His daughter _does_ appear to need to improve her behavior and/or attitude, but destroying things that she likes will only achieve the opposite.
Posted February 10, 2012
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Lexor: I think in some parts he was overreacting but overall I agree.
I am glad that he can use tough love that doesn't involve screaming or abusive language. Plus, a few hundred dollars is not worth as much to the parents as a laptop would be to a teenager. That's a good lesson.

However: discipline should not take away the dignity of the child. Posting this online for her friends to see (and now the world) is devaluing the lesson by turning it into a public spectacle.

Edit: It seems my thinking is in line with that of Psyringe, if only a minute slower.
Post edited February 10, 2012 by csmith
Posted February 10, 2012
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SirPrimalform: Hmm, while I agree he was justified in his anger, shooting the laptop was ridiculous. He should have just taken the hard drive and RAM out and given it back to her.
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Lexor: Or just give whole laptop to charity. :P Yes, a little overreacting here.
I like Primal's idea, but I'm also for finding ways of dealing with it that isn't going to cause major problems for you later down the line. The worse you react to things like this, the harder teenagers are going to rebel.
Posted February 10, 2012
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TwilightBard: The worse you react to things like this, the harder teenagers are going to rebel.
Yes, but also there is always some border line "do not cross". I know, today's teenagers could react quite different from me when I was at their age, but I can't say I was ideal child and a lot of the time was needed for me to discover this.
Posted February 10, 2012
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QC: There's some weirdness around this video as well. I guess the guy's supposed to be a ranch owner.
Nope, google him. He's a well known IT exec with his own business, a far cry from the redneck hillbilly he presents himself as.

If I had a daughter, bought her a laptop, and she used it to tell everyone that I'm a terrible parent for making her do standard household chores (her specific complaint was that she thought she deserved full payment for doing housework), I would do exactly what he did.

Too many spoiled idiots these days. 15 year olds who want formal payment for helping their parents out around the house are a prime example.
Posted February 10, 2012
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TwilightBard: The worse you react to things like this, the harder teenagers are going to rebel.
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Lexor: Yes, but also there is always some border line "do not cross". I know, today's teenagers could react quite different from me when I was at their age, but I can't say I was ideal child and a lot of the time was needed for me to discover this.
I agree, but that border line works both ways. There had to have been better ways of dealing with the situation before it got to this point, including other ways of punishing her...like taking the damn laptop and telling her she can't use it for a week (or longer). I just think his way of doing things was way too much. The way he did it was also very childish, and I shutter to think how I would react if my father did that (at the least, let's just say there wouldn't be a relationship between us after that).
Posted February 10, 2012
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csmith: However: discipline should not take away the dignity of the child. Posting this online for her friends to see (and now the world) is devaluing the lesson by turning it into a public spectacle.
She was the one who created the public spectacle by telling the world what a terrible father he was for making her help out around the house. I think he provided her with a valuable lesson regarding doing unto others as you would have them to unto you.
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This is my favourite topic
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General discussion (archive)angry dad - would you do the same?(180 posts)(180 posts)
(180 posts)