These contests are getting harder and harder with every new one.

Once when playing arcanum I imagined one crazy halfling's mad rampage through Tarant and this song was born, hope it makes someone LOL ;)

To the tunes of jingle bells:

Dashing through the Tarant streets
On my ogre slave
O'er the fields we go
Laughing all the way
Ork proles hammers ring
Making iron bright
What fun it is to laugh and sing
A slaving song tonight

Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride
On my ogrish slave, hey!
Jingle bells, Tarant smells
Fires burn so bright
Oh, what fun it is to shoot
Orkish slaves tonight

A day or two ago
I thought I'd take a ride
And soon my trusty arquebuse
Was seated by my side
Ogre was lean and lank
Misfortune seemed his lot
We got into a heist with bank
And then we got upsot

Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride
While my ogre raves , HEY!
Jingle bells, killing elves
Slaving all the way
Oh, what fun it is to sell
Elves to slavery , YEAH!

Jingle bells, thousand hells
I will make you dead
Oh, what fun it is to put
A price on someone's head
Burning hells, Alarm bells
Police is on the way
Oh, what fun was it to ride
But now it seems I'm dead.

I saw this post when I got up and wrote a holiday song based on 'What shall we do with the drunken sailor' but reading it again before posting now I'm a bit more awake it looks like you're probably using the American sense of holiday specifically meaning Christmas and 'What shall we do with the drunken sailor' isn't terribly seasonal. ;-)

So here's a more appropriate song.

The Other Two Little Boys:

Two little boys had two little toys
Each had a wooden torch
Gaily they played each summer's day
Explorers both of course.
One little chap then had a mishap
Broke off his torch's head
Wept for his toy then cried with joy
As his young playmate said

Did you think I would leave you crying
When there's room round my torch for two
Squeeze up here Jack and don't be crying
We can go just as fast with two.
When we grow up we'll both be 'splorers
And our torches will not be toys
And I wonder if we'll remember
When we were two little boys

Long years had passed, life came so fast
Bravely they marched away
Joe broke his light, and in the house white
Wounded and dying lay
In comes a shout, a house dashes out
Out from the forest's lieu
Gallops away to where Joe lay
Then came a voice he knew

Did you think I would leave you dying
When there's room round my torch for two
Squeeze up here Joe, we'll soon be flying
We can go just as fast with two.
Did you say Joe I'm all a-tremble
Perhaps it's the Forest's noise
But I think it's that I remember
When we were two little boys

Did anyone make a 7th guest/11th hour themed one yet? Oh wait wrong company....still it'd be fun to see one at any rate.

On the first day of Christmas,
Good Old Games fowarded me
one excellent game of ceaser 3

On the second day of Christmas,
Good Old Games fowarded me
2 quests of space
and one excellent game of ceaser 3

On the third day of Christmas,
Good Old Games fowarded me
Three Vampires masquerding
Two quests of space
And one excellent game of ceaser 3

On the fourth day of Christmas,
Good Old Games fowarded me
A four pack of red-bull,
Three Vampires Masquerding
Two quests of space
and one excellent game of Ceaser 3

On the fifth day of Christmas,
Good Old Games fowarded me
Five character guides for Arcanum
A four pack of red-bull
Three Vampires Masquerding
Two quests of space
And one excellent game of Ceaser 3

On the sixth day of Christmas,
Good Old Games fowarded me
all six games of the zork anthology
Five character guides for Arcanum
A four pack of red-bull
Three Vampires Masquerding
Two quests of space
And one excellent game of Ceaser 3

On the seventh day of Christmas,
Good Old games fowarded me
Seven Swats-a-swearing
All six games of the zork anthology
Five character guides for Arcanum
A four pack of red-bull
Three Vampires Masquerding
Two quests of space
And one excellent game of Ceaser 3

On the eighth day of Christmas,
Good Old Games fowarded me
Eight Phantasmic puzzles,
Seven Swats-a-swearing
All six games of the zork anthology
Five character guides for Arcanum
A four pack of red-bull
Three Vampires Masquerding
Two quests of space
And one excellent game of Ceaser 3

On the ninth day of Christmas,
Good Old Games fowarded me
Nine maids of Krondor
Eight Phantasmic puzzles,
Seven Swats-a-swearing
All six games of the zork anthology
Five character guides for Arcanum
A four pack of red-bull
Three Vampires Masquerding
Two quests of space
And one excellent game of Ceaser 3

On the tenth day of Christmas,
Good Old Games fowarded me
Ten kings on quests
Nine maids of Krondor
Eight Phantasmic puzzles,
Seven Swats-a-swearing
All six games of the zork anthology
Five character guides for Arcanum
A four pack of red-bull
Three Vampires Masquerding
Two quests of space
And one excellent game of Ceaser 3

On the eleventh day of Christmas,
Good Old Games fowarded me
Eleven prophesizing Pharoahs
Ten kings on quests
Nine maids of Krondor
Eight Phantasmic puzzles,
Seven Swats-a-swearing
All six games of the zork anthology
Five character guides for Arcanum
A four pack of red-bull
Three Vampires Masquerding
Two quests of space
And one excellent game of Ceaser 3

and finally on the twelfth day of christmas,
Good Old games made free
An activision game of choice ,
all for me :)

Rainbow baby, assemble a team of elite soldiers, for me
The world’s full of awfully bad guys.
Rainbow baby, and hurry out the chopper tonight

Rainbow baby, include an SAS member too, Eddie Price
Experience will be needed
Rainbow baby, and hurry out the chopper tonight

Think of the guns you’ll need
Think of all the problems that you’ll see indeed
Each mission could be oh so tough
If you don’t train oh so rough
Boo doo bee doo

Rainbow honey, we need a sniper and really that’s
Not a lot
Homer Johnston is the best there is
Rainbow baby, and hurry out the chopper tonight

Rainbow cutie, there’s one thing we really do need, a leader
Ding Chavez will be so great
Rainbow baby, and hurry down the chopper tonight

I’m Looking Up A Dark Staircase
(To the tune of White Christmas)


I’m looking up a dark staircase
Plotting actions I may rue.
If I go in ‘ere, I may be dinner
For any silent, lurking Grue.

I’m looking up a dark staircase.
I’d rather not be monster’s snack.
It seems an error, to face that terror,
Even for a kleptomaniac

I’m certain there are great treasures
Through this portal, black as night.
But I won’t reach them without sight.
Now if I could only find a light.

12 Days of Activision

On the first day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; a Tony Hawk under the pair tree

On the second day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; 2 Dj Hero’s, and a Tony Hawk under the pair tree

On the third day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; 3 Bomberman Tournaments, 2 Dj Hero’s and a Tony Hawk under the pair tree

On the fourth day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; 4 Goldeneye’s, 3 Bomberman Tournaments, 2 Dj Hero’s and a Tony Hawk under the Pair Tree

On the fifth day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; 5 Call of Duty’s………., 4 Goldeneye’s, 3 Bomberman Tournaments, 2 Dj Hero’s and a Tony Hawk under the pair tree.

On the sixth day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; 6 copies of Heavy Gear, 5 Call of Duty’s………., 4 Goldeneye’s, 3 Bomberman Tournaments, 2 Dj Hero’s and a Tony Hawk under the pair tree.

On the seventh day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; 7 copies of Blur, 6 copies of Heavy Gear, 5 Call of Duty’s………., 4 Goldeneye’s 3 Bomberman Tournaments, 2 Dj Hero’s and a Tony Hawk under the pair tree.

On the eighth day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; 8 HyperBlade’s, 7 copies of Blur, 6 copies of Heavy Gear, 5 Call of Duty’s.........., 4 Goldeneye’s, 3 Bomberman Tournaments, 2 Dj Hero’s and a Tony Hawk under the pair tree.

On the ninth day of ActivisionGog.com gave to me; 9 Prototype’s, 8 HyperBlade’s, 7 copies of Blur, 6 copies of Heavy Gear, 5 Call of Duty’s………., 4 Goldeneye’s, 3 Bomberman Tournament’s, 2 Dj Hero’s and a Tony Hawk under the pair tree.

On the tenth day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; 10 copies of Rampage, 9 Prototype’s, 8 HyperBlade’s, 7 copies of Blur, 6 copies of Heavy Gear, 5 Call of Duty’s………., 4 Goldeneye’s, 3 Bomberman Tournaments, 2 Dj Hero’s and a Tony Hawk under the pair tree.

On the eleventh day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; 11 Sky Odyssey’s, 10 copies of Rampage, 9 Prototype’s, 8 HyperBlade’s, 7 copies of Blur, 6 copies of Heavy Gear, 5 Call of Duty’s………., 4 Goldeneye’s, 3 Bomberman Tournament’s, 2 Dj Hero’s and a Tony Hawk under the pair tree.

On the Twelfth day of Activision Gog.com gave to me; 12 MechWarrior’s, 11 Sky Odyssey’s, 10 copies of Rampage, 9 Prototype’s, 8 HyperBlade’s, 7 copies of Blur, 6 copies of Heavy Gear, 5 Call of Duty’s………., 4 Goldeneye’s, 3 Bomberman Tournament’s, 2 Dj Hero’s and a Tony Hawk under the pair tree.

Tune of "12 Days of Christmas".

On the twelfth day of Christmas,
Gabriel brought to me
12 trips in Space,
11 years on Quests,
10 eons of foul Reign,
9 tales of Zork,
8 miles of car chase,
7 Obscure Magicks,
6 Masked Vampires,
5 beasts in Krondor,
4 Sinful Fathers
3 Caesar's reigning,
2 freakish nightmares,
And GOG giving them all to me.




Games used:
Gabriel Knight series
Space Quest series
Police Quest series
Dark Reing series
Zork series
Interstate '76
Arcanum of Steamworks and Magick Obscura
Vampire: the Masquerade
Krondor series
Gabriel Knight: Sins of the Fathers
Caesar 3
Phantasmagoria series




Before I wrote the above, I wrote the text below,
I started with this and then realized these are not hust Activision songs I have in front of me, but I decided I will finish it anyway.

Tune of "Let It Snow".

Oh the Planes in 'Scape are frightful,
But Outcast is so delightful,
And since we've no Painkill's to go,
Let Duke have another ho.

It doesn't show signs of Fallout,
And I've brought Rayman to break out,
Commandos are prone way down low,
Let MDK have 'nother go.

When we finally get Serious,
How I'll hate going down in Descent,
But if Syberia is so mysterious,
All the way to Myst I'll be Torment'.

The Stronghold is slowly dying,
And, Gabriel, we're still denying,
But as long as Witcher's with me,
All girls in Freespace are for free.


Games used:
Planescape Torment
Outcast
Painkiller series
Duke Nukem series

Fallout series
Rayman 2: the Great Escape
Commandos series
MDK series (!!!!!!)

Serious Sam series
Descent series
Syberia series
Myst series and finish for Planescape Torment

Stronghold series
Gabriel Knight series
Witcher series
Fresspace series and finish for Witcher

Good King Graham (Good King Wenceslas)
1. Good King Graham of Daventry looked on the schattenjaeger;
2. Roger Wilco mopped the floor oblivious to danger;
3. Sonny Bonds and LA SWAT brought the winter red ale;
4. A German ace in blood red plane arrived in time for GOG's sale.

5. Mr. Knight asked Manannan what do you know of voodoo?
6. When the darkness fell on them, they were eaten by a grue
7. Steampunk elves and moredhel spilled the brown beef gravy,
8. Would Wilco come and mop it up? Maybe now, just maybe...

9. Things began to fall apart when in marched the Romans
10. Worshippers of Mars which was also the Tograns homeland
11. Christof broke the Masquerade, opening up his present
12. Curtis traded his rat Blob, for a festive pheasant.

in order, the references (I think I namechecked almost every Activision game!). Some truly painful rhymes in there :)
1. King's Quest, Gabriel Knight
2. Space Quest
3. Police Quest/ SWAT
4. Red Baron

5. Gabriel Knight, King's Quest 3
6. Zork
7. Arcanum, Krondor
8. Space Quest

9. Caesar 3
10. Dark Reign
11. Vampire: The Masquerade Redemption
12. Phantasmagoria: A Puzzle of Flesh

ACTIVISION contest song (Jingle Bells)
You won’t find here Pitt
Nor Eva Longoria
This game’s surely sick
It’s Phantasmagoria!

You can buy it cheap
So don’t be torrent bot
Or maybe some day
You’ll be killed by SWAT!

Oh Jingle cogs, whistle steam
Bonus content free!
If you want to beat Arcanum
Skilled you must be!
Oh Jingle bells, jingle bells
Show them who’s the best
In one night try to beat
Part 4 – 7 of King’s Quest!

Blooddrops falling down
Same are some pale heads
It’s Christof Romuald
Killing some undeads.

Once he was a man
Now this state is gone
Creatures of the night
Now he is the one!

Oh Jingle swords, jingle shields
Now it’s time to rule!
Bring up Call to Power II
Be a king and just stay cool.
Oh Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle Tear of Gods
You should really take a look
On Betrayal at Krondon pack!

King’s Quest 7, 8
Space Quest 1, 2, 3
You should get them all
9.99 each!

Oh Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Oh what fun it is to ride
425-horsepower sleight.
Jingle shells, burn the wheels
Shoot all other cars
Start your V8 + 50.cal
Send them to the mars!
 

Just for fun GOG song (Jingle Bells)
Crashing through pig cops
Saving our chicks
Duke Nukem - he comes
to kill those alien di$#@!

Brains are on the wall
Burning corpses run
Caleb lives again
Harvests heads like grain.

Oh Jingle bombs, jingle shells
Jingle all the way
Oh, what fun it is to ride
And shoot all life away!
Oh Jingle pots*, jingle wands
Jingle cutted hands
All that fun you will find
On GOG with no DRM!

When our earth is safe
Tchernobog is gone
Time to enter GOG
Buy few games or more.
Maybe Panzer G.
To conquer some land
Maybe Postal 2
Show people you’re mad!

Oh Jingle spears, jingle shields
Do you think as I
That Withcer should fine the way
To fix his left eye?
Oh Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Play Locomotion and find the way
To put Santa’s sleight on the rail!


Merry christmas everyone!

Just minutes ago finished Arcanum for 20th time and saw this, nice coincidence.

Set to "Away in a Manger," and based on the poor, forgotten leaflet from the original Zork!

Away in a mailbox
with tightly-closed lid
An instructional leaflet
Waits to be read

Adventurers LOOK AT
But nobody TAKES
The poor little leaflet
Just sits there and waits

Somebody wanders by
With nothing to do
They're ageless and faceless
Gender-neutral, too

They OPEN the mailbox
And the leaflet they TAKE
It's very excited
But no sound it makes

The adventurer carelessly
Runs into the dark
A grue comes and leaves them
Covered in bite marks

Away in a chewed-on
corpse there it lays
An instructional leaflet
All alone again