Gameplay video with commentary because it makes things a little more exciting when you hear what the player is thinking.

Mustard or mayo?

Mustard. A great mustard is more memorable than a great mayo.

Heartache or Toothache?

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Piano, guitar is for hippy losers.

Mordor or Isengard?

Elric of Rivia, it's the shortest possible combination of these options.

Since someone did a musical instrument question, here's another:

Clarinet or Bassoon?

(I play both these instruments, by the way/)

Bassoon. My mother-law-plays it, and it doesn't screech like a clarinet.

X-Files or Millennium?

Wow! You must be a true party animal, sir. ;P
X-Files; I don't choose the other for disambiguation purposes and because I didn't know it. Added to my pending list.
Cate Archer or Lara Croft?

Um, I'm not a sir.

Incindentally, I didn't learn to play bassoon until after college. It's never too late to learn to play new instruments (provided you aren't disabled in a manner that makes doing so impossible, of course).

I am not familiar with these, so I'll go with the more obscure one, Cate Archer.

Too many Harmonic Gems or not enough Harmonic Gems? (Harmonic Gems are a consumable item in Bard's Tale 3 that restores the user's Spell Points fully; they are by far the most common item in 8-bit versions of the game, while in 16-bit versions, they are way too rare.)

Not so obscure. At least 27315 GOG users want to be under her skin.
This question requires a dtgreenish answer, I'm afraid...
An average number of Harmonic Gems! :D

Regular polyhedrons or cucumbers?

Cucumbers that are shaped like regular polyhedrons, of course!

Spoiler warnings or triggern warnings? (I am actually considering making a serious topic about this.)

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Australia. Far more exotic and full of unique species. New Zealand is like northern Europe, but with toilet water flushing clockwise.

Gamers are used to both...
Lack of sleep or lack of sex?

Lack of sleep of course, because... come on.


Tattoo or piercing?