Hello everyone!

Back when my sister was a toddler, she would look at me and shout "mine glasses!". After that she would pull my glasses off of my face and try to claw my eyes out.

She grew up plenty since then, but now I have a nephew around the same age. He would yank off my glasses and try to scratch my eyes. His nails are very sharp. Sometimes he would catch me off guard and I would howl in pain. When this happens he laughs hysterically.

His teeth are sharp too. I know this because of multiple attempts to cannibalize my arm.

No idea. Been around my nephew , a child of friends i live with and they all do that... seems to a certain age? Maybe some toddlers are more curious than others?.

Babies are cannibals. Throw them in the dumpster and be sure to light it on fire, just to be safe.

Babies inherently know that eyes are the windows to the soul. Once they claw them out, it'll be easier for them to devour your soul.

Cats do the same but to breath while their victim sleeps.

Well, this beats the "Some Guy did something in a Grocery Store" and "When do you replace your phone" threads easily. Congrats man.

Maybe because they are small enough to be eaten by them? Maybe your eyes are candy colored?

If the baby was eaten by a giant Tarantula it wouldn't have this problem anymore. Solved.

Because babies still know that eyes are tasty and they haven't been inhibited by society yet.

I don't think a ship piloted by babies would do very well in a navel battle.

Maybe they're in league with the Woodsie Lord.

The voices in their heads tell them to do that. That's why you have to make sure to get the mother on thorazine so it comes out in the breast milk.

Or at least that's what the evil monkey that lives in my closet told me.

Evil monkeys don't do well in sea combat either.

They just want to rip them out of your skull and play with them for a bit. They'll usually give them back... maybe.