What you do need is professional help, you won't find that here.

Life can be cruel. One of the best life skills is to learn to take punches, always get back back up and always learn from the last time you got knocked down.

When I graduated university, I applied to 50 jobs and got 1 offer. Within 6 months, the company I worked for got bought, they needed senior people, plus my boss was a natural selection nuts (he committed suicide at 38... must have figured out he wasn't among the fittest and thus not worth the air he breathed) and they fired me.

Worked on a web game for 4-5 years after that, but it didn't pan out because I had no drawing/ui design skills to speak of plus I was still a junior and had yet to learn how to make sound technology choices and pick a winning tech stack. It was a couple of very lean years where I had little to show for all my years of schooling and natural talent. I did tutoring for a while, but eventually had to pick some side-work towards the end to pay the bills.

On the plus side, once I got back on the job market in my field, I started from the bottom, but all the skills I had learned while working on that "dead-end" projet really paid off. Less than a decade later, I'm devops architect, make almost 3 times what I got paid when I graduated university and regularly get offers that are close to 150% my current salary to go work in the private sector (currently working for an hospital research center).

It's a real struggle. I'll admit though that it's even harder when you don't have anyone in your corner. I had extremely supportive and loving A grade parents and that helped a lot. Obviously, you can't chose your parents, but you can try to make great RL friends though. Maybe start with that.

I wish I would be in a position to ever have this problem.

can't afford none for the time being. the few ones i had in the intentions of commercial partners are now part of the problem.

thanks for the input, anyway. i'm sure this helps people in other conditions. i provvidd that for some.

>> it's our choice keeping it that way.

One of the best life skills is to learn to take punches, always get back back up and always learn from the last time you got knocked down.

>> i'm used to that. but again i'm thrown into the almost zero. with the added frustration of having the experiences i had for the last round, in which among other stuff i witnessed how apparently good people can be turned into political zombies by the hands of absolute monsters.

When I graduated university, I applied to 50 jobs...

>> part of what i was tying to achieve with the whole institute idea was, at least among our own businesses, deal with such situatons under a more humane perspective. but there's plenty more than that. it's amazing to see people suporting the most dumbest projects while i have to struggle this much to finally being thrown to the dust again either by laziness, lack of professionalism or sheer greediness or other way less respectable stuff. i finally have to admit: yes, my country sucks hard.

Worked on a web game for 4-5 years after that, but it didn't pan out...

>> another reason why i firmly believe in networking among kind people. but... how to find then? i completely lack leadership skills for that, or even the basics to run a youtube channel through which i could speak out about the project - which IS a great idea. it seems i relied too much on superstitious people. can't say i have strength to endure another bach of attempts, this time focusing the gaming industry, which was a future step i was planning, once we had some businesses financially supporting this small studio.

On the plus side, once I got back on the job market...

>> it is said that there are plenty of opportunities at the industry, as of now. even for non-coders, some said me. being just a curious, i created almost 2k small apps using an infrastructure which is said to be prety close to php. there's way more to the story, concerning my role, though. frankly, i'm not in conditions of even tryng to search for them. i can't stand the frustrations anymore. please let me know if you're open to help. congrats for your achievement, sorry i'm not in a rightful mood to cheer up.

It's a real struggle... Maybe start with that.

>> i'm a contact away from my country's current president. i had two of them from the previous monster, one of them personal friends of their criminal sons. i helped some now broken formerly millionaries to circumvemt some issues, one of them, i managed to save her father's Life through my personal contacts. for the last 3 weeks, some of them refused to TALK to me. Life shouldn't be this cruel. one of my goals was precisely to build this structure to support people in finding helpful people - around the world, as some pointed me the idea could actually do. i failed miserably.
believe me... it's definetely not a good experience.