Mother of All Mothers In Law keeps steamrolling the competition!

Calad finds himself whisked back to the arena, about to face an enhanced, bloodthirsty hamster already annoyed by a mosquito. "Good thing I hadn't ordered anything, and that I didn't have to be one of the first," he thinks to himself, then carefully sizes up his opponent from a safe distance, forming a battle plan, probably favoring his sound burst wand over the others, such a small target being more difficult to hit.

Also sparing a glance to the arena for the first round two battles, Calad looks pleased to see his former opponent Og'rialt advance further, then winces and shakes his head when seeing April Ryan having to suffer another defeat, and at the... mouth of such a dreadful opponent. He also wonders what lessons are there to learn from the defeat of his fellow mage in the following battle.

You missed Calad's second weakness, needing to recover after using powerful damage or kill spells, so only using them as last resort. Game-wise, meant that not in the D&D sense of needing to rest before being able to cast again (can actually cast again, with a risk of fumbling the spell and increased penalties later), but more like penalties to rolls until being able to take some time in a safe location after needing to cast such a spell.

I'm curious how my animal handling will work on Lemmy the Lemur, a friend of my monastery has one that flies around and we get along fine (if there's food involved) but his bison also can't be kept on the ground so.. we'll see

I think Mother of All Mothers in Law will take this tournament. That lady has one sharp tongue. You better step up lighthouse. I'm rooting for you.

As for the hussy pussy April Ryan, we already prepared your bowl of milk.

April Ryan got almost the same fight as mine (Astridr) we had no chance against Mother of All Mothers in Law, she doesn't need to fight, just looked at us and she won :)

Good that you said that, because...

Scoop! All that you ever feared to know about Mother of All Mothers in Law! Check the updated bio of participant #33! *shivers* All in the entrants's spreadsheet.

New pictures! Find out what participants look like. A suggestion: if you add a portrait of your character, it will look nice in the original post as well (find a convenient link in the spreadsheet, if it helps you).

Some corrections made. If you notice anything amiss, feel free to send me a PM.

A suggestion: if you add a picture, it will look nice in the original post as well.

Fight 4

A large man with unnatural hair (110) <censored> enters the arena. He is muttering under his breath, referring to himself in third person.
Across the arena is a man of beauty (and doesn't he know it) (47) Tobi, walking while also admiring himself in a mirror and stroking his belt.

* DICE ROLL 1 *
<censored> rolls 8
Tobi rolls 5

<censored> advances on Tobi "Look, your appearance - my nephew is also very handsome, good genes, very good genes, very tall - you know, that belt is a nice belt. My belt is the best belt, my belt will make america great again - you're a good looking man but you - I was also, am also, a good looking man. The ladies would fall over me, so I would grab them by the..." Tobi interrupts "ENOUGH! Jeez, you would give Cthulhu himself a headache! Talking of whom..."

Tobi smiles and presses down on his belt and the ground splits before him. Out crawls the Lovecraftian horror, Cthulhu.
"This won't take long" he gloats.

<censored> looks nonplussed "Your pet is nice - my pet is nice too. My pet is the best pet, 110% pure American pet better than any other pet."

As Cthulhu advances, <censored>'s strange orange hair springs off his head, leaping into Cthulhu's mouth and makes its way to the creatures brain. Cthulhu thrashes around in agony as the sentient wig takes control of its mind and body.
Cthulhu turns to look at Tobi who backs away open-mouthed.
Cthulhu lunges forward, grabbing the screaming man and heads back into the fissure it emerged from, which closes behind it.

<censored> with his wig magically reappearing on his head, waves to the crowd before slowly walking out of the left gate of the arena.
Tobi is brooding in the tavern, smelling slightly of sulphur.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------

Fight 5

The crowd are in good spirits following the performance of the man with the orange hair. They look to the gates to see who will be next.

A tall, smiling Canadian enters with two fishing rods slung over his left shoulder. He looks up to the crowd "How ya doing?". It is hard not to like this man and that is reflected in the audiences response.
Through the right gate swoops the ancient Gargoyle Uzerumeral, grinning evilly as it appraises its opponent.

* DICE ROLL 1 *
Gerald of Red Deer rolls 7
Uzerumeral rolls 8

Uzerumeral swoops down, grabbing for Gerald tearing the Canucks shirt and coming up with a fishing rod in its claws.
"Jeez, if you need to borrow a rod just ask buddy!"
Uzerumeral snorts and snaps the fishing rod in half, letting it drop to the ground.
Gerald is not pleased "Hey, what's that all aboot buddy? You know what pal? You're a dick!"

* DICE ROLL 2 *
Gerald of Red Deer rolls 10
Uzerumeral rolls 5

Gerald starts smiling "Ah, nevermind you hoser, we can still be friends, buddy!" "I managed to find a lake to go fishing in, water was red mind, what's that all aboot, eh? Anyways, i managed to fish this up."
Gerald holds up a sparkling amulet.
Uzerumeral gawps in horror as he recognizes it as the amulet of control his master crafted many centuries ago.

Gerald holds the amulet in front of his face - "I think my friend there would look great sitting atop my cabin porch, eh?"
There is a loud squawk and when Gerald looks up, the gargoyle is gone. Gerald shrugs, places the amulet around his neck (it's warmer than before) and waves to the crowd before leaving the arena.
Uzerumeral is in the tavern shaking snow from his body and cursing knuckle-headed Canadians.

I so love the write ups for Mother of all Mothers In Law and <censored> - and obviously many others too - but you got me right by the funny bone with those Doc.

I thought the sentient cyber swarm of hornets was one of the cooler ideas for an intergalactic fight club member so I'm looking forward to my next fight ;)

ninja golem didn't make it?

what a shame

Yeah, sad.
I hope he'll make a (destructive) cameo anyway XD

Very funny fights!!. #4 was the duel of narcissist characters. Whoa, Tobi found an ever greater ego than his, apparently!

Oh no, the cats are not doing well on round two! :(

Mother of All Mothers in Law rolls is unstoppable, lol, what a character!

Fight 4 was hilarious! I couldn't stop laughing out loud. You know you're in trouble when not even Cthulhu stands a chance against that orange sentient hair piece. xD

Hey man, keep your abilities, give me your food and maybe we can call it even?

"Sorry, I gave my last bits of rations to that squirrel. All I have left for you is cold blue fire!"
*ignites gunsaber and takes a fighting pose*
"You thought I was going to say cold blue 'cheese' didn't you? That would make this fight too easy. I enjoy a hearty challenge."