The MFing daily surprise included Divinity 2. Also, they "opened a few early," one of which was Divinity 2 at $4.99. So, silly me thought that by clicking it in the random surprise list, I'd get a better price, so I ignored the other packages. You can guess what the price was when I uncovered Divinity 2, right?

If I only knew what he's thinking with. I mean, he's a *really* weird guy and I believe or at least hope that this cynical attitude of his is just a phase after having been disappointed multiple times and he'll eventually snap out of it.
Don't know either one, will have to watch them just to find out how accurate the guesses were. :D
I became a cunt because I had no friends but being a cunt I made friends and then turned the cunt-being a little down. It's funny how complex and diverse the relationship between cuntship and friendship can be.

I can completely agree with that >_>

On current topic I can understand being a loner then getting into a relationship from a chick and getting hurt made me a cynical jerk then low and behold it was easy to make friends being like that. I'm somewhat still like that, however I can be good hearted at times too.

Real life....EVE Online....same shit. If you trust someone in that game, you will get f*cked.

So, my Dad is at the hospital once again because his pancreas keeps acting up and the doctors have no idea what's causing it. Every couple of months, sometimes weeks, it gets inflamed. It isn't cancer and I thank God for that but still, the doctors are clueless. They've discovered that there's some anomaly that they could solve through surgery but they aren't sure that it will help and of course there's risks and now my parents have a day or two to decide whether he should go through a risky procedure where it's impossible to tell whether it will help (let me add that my parents live in Germany so please, no comments about uneducated stupid Polish doctors - especially from Polish users :P). Additionally stress seems to trigger the inflammation so everyone will have to be extremely careful during the holidays but well, let me say that the holidays are pretty much the most stressful time each year for our family and actually it's not even clear whether he'll be able to spend Christmas at home.

Additionally my grandmother (my Mom's mother) almost died yesterday. She's blind *and* stupid (also pure Evil) and insists on doing things she shouldn't like taking out the trash - so she fell down the stairs when she got lost in the building, bled a lot (from her head, no less), apparently she even broke something etc., it sounds worse than it is because now she's at my aunt's and in stable condition but well, I totally froze when my aunt called me today. Thank God the neighbor is a decent person. In Poland people seem to generally ignore any suspicious sounds, stay out of other people's stuff but she instantly checked when she heard the noise and instantly called an ambulance, if she hadn't done so my grandmother probably would have bled out. Now that thing happened and I can't even tell my Mom about it - my aunt told me that I shouldn't and she's right, as rough as things are lately we should probably wait before we tell her, the last thing I want to happen is for my Mom to get even more stressed out and careless when she's so busy taking care of my dad, getting the whole family to meet in a few days etc..

And then there's the thing - it was always clear that as soon as my aunt would take care of my grandmother I would move into her flat. It seems pretty clear now that after this my grandmother will stay at my aunt's place but that means that I will have to take over the other place earlier than expected which means that I'll have to take over the rent and I don't know how my girlfriend and I will handle that. Until we find someone to rent her apartment to we'd have to pay two full rents while using only one apartment. It's insane. Plus there's a chance that my Dad's illness will cost him his job, also my parents just bought a new car because their old one broke down etc. so I can't count on my parents' financial support for now. God, things are going to shit.

Fuck man, just...FUCK. Look, I don't know how it happens, or why, but when the world simply beats you down and your chest just begins to cave in from the weight of it all, something changes. Either inside yourself, or with the entire world, but something changes, and everything works out, usually better than before. You don't always come out of the shit with all the same things you had before, but you'll realize you are worth more, happier, stronger, smarter. It will be better. Not just better than right now, but better than it ever was.

Cheers, mate.

Thank you.

My Grandpa died. I don't know why I'm posting about it here. I still haven't realized he's dead. I still think, that when I visit him in the holidays, he'll be sitting there, complaining about technology and calling me names. Until he taps my shoulder to say how happy he is to see me. But I also kind of know, it will just be a fucking stone i'll be looking at. With this date of birth and death carved in. But what I hate the most right now is myself. Because It's like I don't care, I haven't cried, haven't even felt anything. I began shaking for no reason. It just happens out of nothing. It's not cold or anything it just happens.

My condolences. Personal experience says that the fact hasn't registered with you yet, and it will hit you at some later point. It could be that you'll see something that reminds you of him and makes you realize that he's gone, or it may be passing by one of his favorite spots. It will eventually heal, even though the sadness never quite goes away.
Hang in there, and try to remember the time you spent with him.

Thanks man. I know it will strike me one day. but honestly i'm not really looking forward to it.

Commiserations Soccorro. It's a poignant reminder to me of the important things around me. I'm so sorry for your loss. All the very best.

Thank you very much. And yes, spend as much time as possible with your loved ones. I didn't do it, because my grandpa is living in another country. I just called my relatives. Wanted to ask them, how my grandpa is doing. The answer was more than clear: "He died this morning, they couldn't save him. I'm sorry". The moment i've heard he's dead, it felt like someone rammed a knife into my heart. it sounds soppy but thats exactly what it felt like.

I'm sorry for your loss. And I know what you're going through. I also sometimes kinda hate myself for not taking someone's death as badly as I should but frankly, in my experience the closer the person who died was to me the more complex and surreal the realization of his or her death was. When my Mom told me that my uncle had just died several years ago I also didn't shed a tear, it didn't even hurt me that much at first, my mind would play all sorts of tricks on me very soon, though. In my experience when you care very deeply about someone your reaction can take all sorts of different and incomprehensible forms, almost as if your mind just decided "naah, crying is so trivial, it wouldn't do this person justice" and then it goes for something... different. So really, don't beat yourself up over your reaction. The fact that it bothers you how you reacted to the news just shows that you actually do care a lot.

My condolences and yes you are most likely still in the shock phase. When my mom passed, it wasn't until the funeral that I really broke down. Up to that point I was really in shock and was going through the same thing as you...asking myself why I wasn't a total wreck...I actually was, but it was all internalized until that day and for quite a long time afterward.
There will be other people you meet that will be the exact opposite, everyone reacts differently so try not to judge people that seem to be showing no symptoms of grief.

My condolences to you Soccorro, the fact you posted it shows its on your mind. Sometimes we don't cry with tears right off or at all. Throughout the years a moment will come up and then you'll miss the person. It might be something you used to do together or something that reminds you of a joke he told or something funny or just a question you want to ask. So for what it's worth, I think your normal as anybody else.