Granted, but it's a cursed instrument that makes you play at a rapid pace each session till you hyperventilate and pass out.

I wish for a Killing Time remaster that fixes most if not all of the bugs that game has.

Wish granted. The bugs of the original have now been fixed, but the game has been pulled in favour of the still buggy remaster, and removed from libraries.

I wish for a marble containing the entire universe.

Granted, but unfortunately, the marble is so big you can't hold it. In fact, it's so big that it does not fit in the entire universe.

I wish for a number of marbles equal to the 2-adic number ...01010101.01

Granted, but this attracts the attention of an extra-dimensional monster which hates maths because of traumatic experiences in maths class. The monster decides to store you in an extra-dimensional pocket plane, so that it won't be triggered by maths-related comments anymore when browsing the Gog forum.

I wish for visual novels to be banned on Gog, these aren't proper games and shouldn't be sold on a gaming store.

Except for the fact that the comment was "math" related, not "maths" related. (Notice the difference between singular and plural?)
Granted, but they also ban all games from GOG, as they're not "proper" game (whatever that means) and shouldn't be sold on a gaming store.

As a result, there's nothing left for GOG to sell, so it goes out of business.

I wish for the current season to end.

Granted: Now whenever you walk into a grocery store, you find all sorts of chips. Potato chips, chocolate chips, and others.

Unfortunately, these chips have dominated the shelves in the grocery store, to the point where it's now difficult to find any other type of food.

(Oh, and the availability and price of electronics (including GPUs) did not change as the result of your wish.)

I wish for facebook to disappear entirely, and for said disappearance to be permanent.

Wish granted. And, because I have no desire to corrupt this wish, i must momentarily change this thread into a 'reasons for banning' tread.

Banned for having an avatar that makes me crave pastry.

Granted the ban is in place but it also covers every type pastry made in the world, there are now a lot of pissed off bakers after you.

I wish for the NHS to begin offering new cloned bodies grown rapidly to any age that your personality (or existence or soul or life force or whatever) can be transferred into if anything happens to your current body or if you just want to roll back the clock or have parts of your body modified for vanity reasons.

Granted, but then Boris Johnson privatizes the NHS and the procedure is only available for succesful businessmen like Donald Trump or Richard Branson, because mere proles don't deserve it.

I wish for graphics development for new games to be prohibited, developers should focus on gameplay, and it's not fair people with older computers (like me) are disadvantaged.

Granted, but now all games have ASCII art graphics, like those in Candy Box 2 or Sanctuary RPG.

I wish RPGs would be as varied, in terms of their game mechanics, as they were back in the 1980s, before the genre was firmly established. (I'm thinking mechanics like Ultima 1's lack of a max HP stat and Final Fantasy 2's non-XP based growth.)

Wish granted. Deep learning programming now take lessons from every 80s RPG made and, as a result, you have a game that randomly assigns features such as character development, experience points and spell/weapon strength, but in such a way that the outcome always is balanced. On the downside, the configuration you fall in love with, will never be generated again.

I wish oranges could be cultivated in arctic regions, and that they develop a unique photosensitivity that enables growth at night under the northern lights.

Granted, but said oranges are not safe to eat.

I wish for a new RPG in the style of the original Dragon Quest, with similar game design decisions (including the need to spend hours walking in circles to get the XP needed to clear the game).

Granted. The newest best RPG of Dragon Quest with today's standards is ported (every feature intact) to the NES system, and runs at a whopping 10fpm (frames per minute)

I wish the evil in humans and human nature to be obliterated.

I hope you feel good about having just committed mass genocide.

I wish for the human race to return to life.