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high rated
(45) Stranger, an otherworldly being raised by Tibetan villagers and monks raises his hands and sways from side to side. He hums a tune and all animals, both natural and alien, are entranced by the music that he emits and join in the swaying and humming as humanoids and robots watch in awe.
Feeling at ease, the white faced clown makes his way down to Snookums, hugs the car and gets inside.

(31) Abdullah Oblongata is operating undercover as a clown having been tipped off about a nefarious shadowy figure and a selection of alien pies that could potentially spell the end of the Andromeda galaxy.
He makes his way to Mr Whuffles as he bides his time until the Alien pie-flinging contest starts.

Stranger keeps a silent vigil for what he is to juggle when he spots two hairy beasts fall from the sky. He meets them and juggles them with ease as music plays that will tame any animalistic aggression. The music is unnecessary as the beasts are actually an alien race of Space Yetis that left Stranger on Earth in order to fulfill a destiny that will ultimately save his species from extinction.
As they are juggled, one of the Yetis telepathically tells him that his parents watch from afar and are proud of him.
A single tear rolls down Strangers cheek in a rare show of human emotion from him.

Abdullah drives his car when a mouth watering smell of savoury pastries hits him from above. He clambers onto his vehicles roof, excited about getting his hands on the clown schools legendary pies sooner than he had thought when instead he sees three sausage rolls falling towards him.
While these snacks may be frowned upon in the Andromeda galaxy, they are not feared like pies are.
He starts to juggle them, so as not to blow his cover, when all three open little mouths and attack him with nasty, pointy little teeth.
Cursing, Abdullah fights back the only way he knows how - devouring the meaty snacks (enjoying them immensely as he does).
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Doc0075: (...)
Jabbar prepared a great speech for both sides and after the first step, he slipped on the oil puddle and slid down the ring center doing saltos and turning cartwheels trying to keep a smile.... he landed in the center.
Nice entry! Said Doc. How many scores for Immalil Gimm Icky?
Jab raised a hand with four fingers. All right... Noting that as four... And how many scores for Zombeat the Medic? Jab raised the Shisha and the other hand in turn after a second of reflection showing four fingers again.
So four it is! Samba! And the whole circus started to dance ^
After the show Stranger quietly joins Abdullah and proposed: 'Would you like some pie?'. He swiftly makes a few small gestures and just creates delicious cherry pie and two cups of damn fine and black as midnight on a moonless night coffee.
As he serves the coffee, he leans closer and whispers in a low voice ‘Do you know, that the ratio of a circle's circumference to its diameter, approximately equal to 3.14?’.
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ThatGuyWithTheThing: Would you care to join the Get Off My Lawn Association Worldwide (GOMLAW)?
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mrkgnao: I'm too old for that.
LOL! But a premium rifle is also given out free if you're a resident where gun laws are more lax :D
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KillingMoon: It's ancient Greek music, only dragons remember it ;)
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Cavalary: Demis Roussos is ancient? Damn...
Didn't even know the song was that old, kept hearing it throughout the 90s, occasionally even 00s.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ooLDXodZkIw
Post edited December 10, 2023 by drxenija
And the scores are in for the teamup of Pierrot and Iron Simon!

Both contestants were under pressure - literally, since a demon was pressing a foot on their cars! Thus neither really had a chance to demonstrate their driving or juggling skills in the beginning. Surprisingly, neither chose to demonstrate such skills for the demon either, and this became a contest of joke versus joke.

Pierrot was true to his straight man routine, but presented a strangely entertaining showing, making a shaggy dog tale of a well-known math pun - recognizable but embellished beyond belief with so many additional math-based details, I couldn't help but be amused by the sheer audacity of it. Will bring a smile even if not a belly laugh - I will score Pierrot's performance a strong 4.

(So you could say Pierrot should feel four-tunate, and should not feel so four-lorn, ahaha.... er, see, the puns could have been worse!)

Iron Simon had a reasonable knock-knock joke premise, but did not really make the joke his own - where were any references to Manchester or its factories? As Iron Simon's act is largely prop-based, surprisingly he did not use any props either like sculptures or balloons to entertain the demon. He did get to breathe out his signature liquid iron balls, but only due to being anxious. A lot of this can be due to the sudden panic of course. I'll score Iron Simon a 3 this time - a decent outing for the Mancunian but room to improve. I'm glad to see he did not become demon lunch for good, cheers for future shows Iron Simon!
Post edited December 10, 2023 by DiffuseReflection
Voido adresses everyone in the tent, for it was their turn to judge the participants:

"Attention, mortals! It's time for us to jugde the pairing of BoomBox Kitty and The Amazing Morpho!"

"And remember: That since our goal is to judge mortalkind based on their capacity to entertain, we shall judge the participants based on how much they amused us!"

"Now, for the rapping cat, BoomBox Kitty: We recognize that his rap was competent enough, but his performance was missing something else... some sort of punchline, if you will. In some respects, that cat who acted like a dog was more amusing than the participant himself! So this is our punchline for you, mortal!"

Voido indifferently rated BoomBox Kitty's performance with a 3!

"As for the mannequin, The Amazing Morpho!: He was setting himself up for a mind-numbing performance, but the increasingly hard struggle to balance driving the car and juggling the eggs brough our attention back, and that final crash in the shadowy alcove finished saving his act! We will be watching you with great interest, mannequin!"

Voido approvingly rated The Amazing Morpho's performance with a 4!

The cosmic being felt a shadowy presence glaring at them over that last judgement, and for some reason Voido couldn't help but feel somewhat nervous...

"Well, um... That is all! ...You may continue with the event now!" Voido stated as they quickly flied back to their viewing spot.
Post edited December 10, 2023 by Ilan14
For General entertainment value and supernatural special effects quality (79) Voido is awarded with 4 points.
For general cuteness of contestant and performance choreography (16) Kabanchik gets 3 points.
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Doc0075: As he approaches Snookums, he decides the little car could do with a bit more colour to better suit his style. He grabs a passing bespectacled man and nonchalantly rips him in half, using the blood to paint red smiley faces on the sides of the car.
ROFL! Something tells me that you know Cornelius better than I do, Doc! xD I had tears in my eyes, almost died laughing... What have I done in creating such a colourful character? xD

* * * * * *
Cornelius was pleased with his performance for this first round. It went better than he had anticipated. The red clown nose that doctor Daffodil had grafted onto her horrified patient brought a smile to his face. She was a great competitor and an impressive juggler too. Cornelius hoped that the bloody smiley faces he had painted on the sides of the car showed all of the tent spectators that he did indeed have a sensitive side to him and a wholesome sense of humour.

Just as Cornelius was fine-tuning his musical masterpiece created from the shrieks and howls of the tormented trio of sinners he was happily juggling, a Dark Shadowy Figure tapped him on his shoulder with an urgent request: it was time to evaluate and score an earlier performance...

Once again, Cornelius spat on his hoofs and rubbed his demon horns, in that manner he does whenever he needed to do some serious thinking. This ritual helped to jolt his brain into action. Much like a movie projector, his mind was now replaying the performances of mini dinosaur, Balaurul Bondoc, and eccentric film critic, Quentin Verbose.

Cornelius recalled Balaurul Bondoc's adorable tap dance routine and how this undersized dinosaur looked like a tiny demon of sorts. If he had seen the likes of Balaurul in Hell, he would have adopted him as a pet, without hesitation! Balaurul Bondoc definitely was in the spotlight during his performance, all sentient studio cameras fully enthralled by his sqwarks and skreets.

Quentin Verbose's razor-sharp tongue and his venemous quips impressed Cornelius the most. Quentin would make a successful soul-tormentor in Hell, inflicting pain on others with nothing more than damaging words. The next time Cornelius decides to print stuff on a t-shirt, it would be Quentin's retort: "Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory". Cornelius' only disappointment was that he wished Quentin would have fed those annoying chickens to his competitor, Balaurul.

After much consideration, Cornelius decided to score the performances as follows:
(56) Balaurul Bondoc = 3
(61) Quentin Verbose = 4
Post edited December 11, 2023 by matterbandit
Having made it past the first act with those juggling borg drones, Ben Klownski has been tasked by The Shadowy Figure to score Beatbox Grandma and Doctor Otto Altenhof on their performances.

BB Grandma has got the beat for sure. Juggling is one thing. But rapping juggling? That's on another level by itself. 5 out 5!

Unfortunately Doc Otto didn't do so well. Getting dissected with blood gushing everywhere can make one's stomach churn. 2 out 5!
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Doc0075:
Being asked to score the performance of Is (a Villager) and TPJ, the scores are:

(24) Is - That final flash transforming the poor goblins in potatoes decided the score. Isekai Is couldn't overcome his trauma yet - 2
(38) TPJ - It almost got a full 5 due the sheep joke, he must been born in New Zealand :), the Caveman will be delighted with the potato if the goblin reverses the magic during the boiling! - 4
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Doc0075:
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Dark_art_: Being asked to score the performance of Is (a Villager) and TPJ, the scores are:

(24) Is - That final flash transforming the poor goblins in potatoes decided the score. Isekai Is couldn't overcome his trauma yet - 2
(38) TPJ - It almost got a full 5 due the sheep joke, he must been born in New Zealand :), the Caveman will be delighted with the potato if the goblin reverses the magic during the boiling! - 4
TPJ: "Thanks for your vote, dear voter! What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?
A Candy Baaa" Have fun #Dark_art_ and thanks for the show, GM #Doc0075!
Beatbox grandma is still humming the impromptu beat of his new bbx ensemble "Act of Funk", when someone—or something—hands her yet another ledger with two names written on it. She grabs the scoring device begrudgingly, not even bothering to look at who, or at what, handed it to her. She's got other things to worry about now, like friends who can follow her beat and friendly beats she could try to follow. It's a strange idea, and an even stranger feeling. No, it's a pain in the ass, that's what it is. Last time she got partnered with someone, the clownish imbecile ruined her performance. Nobody ruins her performances, nobody! Only she is allowed to do so and only when she's had it.

Looking down at the ledger, she scribbles something with fury. Then, raising her leg and stomping on someone else's face, she boosts herself up and shows her scores around whilst ignoring her lazy reiteration and yelling: "You're all a bunch of clowns, I hate you all!"

Voido: 4.
Kabanchik: 4.
Doctor Otto Altenhof: I hate you too.

Beatbox grandma sits down and resumes her humming without even noticing. She doesn't quite understand what it is yet, but something resembling a smile has begun to nest somewhere deep within, pounding between each one of her heartbeats. "Wait. Am I having a stroke?" she wonders.
Post edited December 11, 2023 by Wirvington
high rated
(35) Tenty eyes Voido curiously, "Papa?" he asks except no-one can understand what he (she?) says. It moves towards the waiting Mr Whuffles slowly, its tentacles struggling with dry land.

(85) Zhabokhrobae has everyone looking at him in puzzlement as he wanders around, introducing himself in a squeaky voice despite having no mouth. He lets rip and soon find himself alone. Shrugging his shoulders (does he have shoulders?) he drags his gross, fat belly over to Snookums.

Tenty looks at Mr Whuffles in confusion. What is it meant to do with this gurning contraption? It picks the car up in its tentacles and slowly slaps its way around the tent.
Several pies fall from the sky (Abdullah watches intensely) but Tenty merely opens its maw and swallows the pies whole.
It thinks to itself, not bad but mine are better. I better crack on with baking those alien pies that shadow person asked for, as he will need them soon.
Tenty drops the indignant Mr Whuffles where he is and slowly moves towards the back of the tent where the stoves are kept.

Snookums wobbles from side to side as the huge bellied creature inside keeps over balancing the little car. Even more pies fall from the sky and Zhabokhrobae's long limbs reach up to grab them.
He juggles them competently but strangely, little bite sized pieces disappear yet no-one can see a mouth to eat them with.
Abdullah sneaks up to try to get a sample of a pie but Zhabokhrobae laughs maniacally as he farts disgustingly and the spy collapses in a puddle of his own vomit.
*cue James Bond theme tune*
Roboclown has been observing the performances with their standard dispassion, and has come to the following completely scientific evaluations according to the ticker tape rolling out of the vent on the side of their head:
Bambolina the Anti-Clown receives a 5.
Senior Funny Blob receives a 3.