Posted July 08, 2016
Mind Zero, Vita
Some devs played Persona and thought, "We can do that!" They couldn't. I know "clone" and similar words get thrown about a lot, but this RPG--featuring a group of modern-day Japanese teens who form contracts with demons to fight for them--is pretty transparent. And it's not just the general premise; the game plays out exactly like the first Persona game, with its (essentially) menu-based overworld and FPS dungeon crawling, and the similarity goes all the way down to the individual characters; for example, there are a pair of police officers, and if you want to try to tell me they aren't Adachi and Dojima under different names ... I mean, I'll listen to your arguments I guess.
But the thing is, I don't care if a game innovates or is original; those are just buzzwords. I read mystery novels, for heavens sake, and everyone knows that Rex Stout's Nero Wolfe was inspired by Arthur Conan Doyle's Mycroft Holmes, and that Edmund Crispin's Gervase Fen is basically just John Dickson Carr's Gideon Fell, who is himself based on real-life author G. K. Chesterton, who wrote the Father Brown mysteries. So what? The problem is, Mind Zero isn't terribly good. Most of the actual gameplay takes place in the first person as you explore lengthy, winding mazes. Well heck, I liked Might and Magic. But whereas Might and Magic had actual puzzles, messages on the wall that you had to keep track of, mysterious pools that can hurt or help you, etc, etc, Mind Zero has ... lengthy, windy mazes. No puzzles, no interesting level design, no interesting features. Just wandering around dozens of perfectly interchangeable, dull, mazes that could have been ripped out of a children's book of puzzles. "Help irritating anime protagonist reach the irritating anime badguy!" the directions would read. And yes, it's ripping off the first Persona game, but for heaven's sake there's a reason the series went another direction.
The plot starts out interesting but deteriorates. The combat isn't interesting or strategic, but enemies are damage sponges, so expect to spend a lot of time at it. The characters are widely-drawn anime stereotypes, which, OK, let's be fair, is true for a lot of the Persona protagonists too, especially in the first game. The skill system is potentially interesting, but is designed in a way to make the characters basically interchangable. The ending resolves nothing, and is presumably supposed to set up a sequel.
I didn't like it, is where I'm going with all of this.
Super Mario Land, Gameboy/emulator
Well this is a blast from my childhood. I know I played a lot of it, but I don't remember that I ever beat it, so when my brother reminded me of its existence, I decided to see if I could finally cross it off my backlog. To which the answer is yes, I could. If I didn't beat this game as a kid, I must have been quite abnormally bad at it; there are only four worlds of three levels each, and although there's no saving, and a game over sends you back to the beginning, I got to the fourth world my first attempt and beat it the next. Short and easy. I think if I'd beaten it so easily as a child, I would perhaps have felt quite ripped off (or rather, my parents would have, since it was a gift). As an adult, I thought it was a pleasant diversion.
Some devs played Persona and thought, "We can do that!" They couldn't. I know "clone" and similar words get thrown about a lot, but this RPG--featuring a group of modern-day Japanese teens who form contracts with demons to fight for them--is pretty transparent. And it's not just the general premise; the game plays out exactly like the first Persona game, with its (essentially) menu-based overworld and FPS dungeon crawling, and the similarity goes all the way down to the individual characters; for example, there are a pair of police officers, and if you want to try to tell me they aren't Adachi and Dojima under different names ... I mean, I'll listen to your arguments I guess.
But the thing is, I don't care if a game innovates or is original; those are just buzzwords. I read mystery novels, for heavens sake, and everyone knows that Rex Stout's Nero Wolfe was inspired by Arthur Conan Doyle's Mycroft Holmes, and that Edmund Crispin's Gervase Fen is basically just John Dickson Carr's Gideon Fell, who is himself based on real-life author G. K. Chesterton, who wrote the Father Brown mysteries. So what? The problem is, Mind Zero isn't terribly good. Most of the actual gameplay takes place in the first person as you explore lengthy, winding mazes. Well heck, I liked Might and Magic. But whereas Might and Magic had actual puzzles, messages on the wall that you had to keep track of, mysterious pools that can hurt or help you, etc, etc, Mind Zero has ... lengthy, windy mazes. No puzzles, no interesting level design, no interesting features. Just wandering around dozens of perfectly interchangeable, dull, mazes that could have been ripped out of a children's book of puzzles. "Help irritating anime protagonist reach the irritating anime badguy!" the directions would read. And yes, it's ripping off the first Persona game, but for heaven's sake there's a reason the series went another direction.
The plot starts out interesting but deteriorates. The combat isn't interesting or strategic, but enemies are damage sponges, so expect to spend a lot of time at it. The characters are widely-drawn anime stereotypes, which, OK, let's be fair, is true for a lot of the Persona protagonists too, especially in the first game. The skill system is potentially interesting, but is designed in a way to make the characters basically interchangable. The ending resolves nothing, and is presumably supposed to set up a sequel.
I didn't like it, is where I'm going with all of this.
Super Mario Land, Gameboy/emulator
Well this is a blast from my childhood. I know I played a lot of it, but I don't remember that I ever beat it, so when my brother reminded me of its existence, I decided to see if I could finally cross it off my backlog. To which the answer is yes, I could. If I didn't beat this game as a kid, I must have been quite abnormally bad at it; there are only four worlds of three levels each, and although there's no saving, and a game over sends you back to the beginning, I got to the fourth world my first attempt and beat it the next. Short and easy. I think if I'd beaten it so easily as a child, I would perhaps have felt quite ripped off (or rather, my parents would have, since it was a gift). As an adult, I thought it was a pleasant diversion.
Post edited July 08, 2016 by BadDecissions