Fortunately for him he was a faster typer than I.

Unfortunately, Zeogold was faster once more. xD

Fortunately, I'm a licensed and certified posting ninja.

Unfortunately that license is expired.

Fortunately I beat him this time.

Unfortunately, you got beaten by both him AND omega, and your ninja license is to be promptly revoked.

Unfortunately, it seems that there are some serious race conditions. In particular, a bank account of mine that is never allowed to go negative just did, causing the amount in the bank account to underflow, giving me 184 quadrillion dollars to spend. Needless to say, this is not good for the economy.

Edit: The 2 "Unfortunately"s in a row is just a sign of another race condition.

Fortunately, not all of us are nerds.

Unfortunately Zeogold is a nerd.

Fortunately you have more than enough money to conduct our experiment with now.

Fortunately I'm going to lay down and give my pillow some head soon. So I can wake up refreshed and be a better ninja.

Unfortunately, the spider living in the pillow is not fond of intruders.

Fortunately I eat spiders, because I always get the munchies before bed and I was wondering what I was going to snack on.

Unfortunately, in between when you picked up the spider and when you put it in your mouth, someone set the spider on fire, so you now have a burning spider in your mouth.

(Yet another race condition.)