langurmonkey: Most people have become such disgusting sheep. They will do anything to be trendy. My eyes want to diarrhea everyone time I go out or watch TV.

AlKim: Reminds me of the time when I was at the opticians, scouting for new eyeglasses - the frames on my old ones were slightly bent and there was a pretty substantial scratch on one lens, so I was shopping out of necessity rather than fashion - and one of the employees there came and asked if she could possibly do anything for you, sir. I told her I wanted a new pair of eyeglasses and, completely ignoring the fact that I'm not a fashionable person by any standards, led me to a stand where they had those thick-rimmed Buddy Holly glasses that all the dickheads like to wear these days. She started to bang on about how they were all the rage these days, so I interrupted her, no kidding, with the words "look, my phone is a Nokia, my computer is a PC and my mountain bike's got gears. Let's start again, okay?"

Profanity: Tell me that you were having a laugh there, Kim.

langurmonkey: Yeah, if you are a male, in most countries, being a dickhead is trendy. But what does that say about females? Most of em are attracted to dickheads.

AlKim: Well, I really do have a Nokia, a PC and a geared mountain bike as opposed to the Apple, Apple and fixie road bike that the stereotypical hipster owns. I also didn't want massive rims due to my not caring about trendiness, and she actually got the message, even laughed at my comment, and sold me a pair of decidedly untrendy spectacles.

AlKim: Well, I really do have a Nokia, a PC and a geared mountain bike as opposed to the Apple, Apple and fixie road bike that the stereotypical hipster owns. I also didn't want massive rims due to my not caring about trendiness, and she actually got the message, even laughed at my comment, and sold me a pair of decidedly untrendy spectacles.

AlKim: To me it says that they are probably the sort of females that I wouldn't really care about anyway, so good for them and good riddance. Not that I attract womenfolk in general: I could dress up in whatever bollocks is thought to be trendy these days and ride a fixie around town for all I liked and I still couldn't score because my personality is so blunt that it strikes ladies in the face like a wrecking ball whenever I open my stupid face. I've decided to play it straight and unpretentious, come the Nine Hells or high water.

SpooferJahk: This is not so much a bitching post because everything is going good for me to some extent, but more or less me voicing concern about my life right now...

I just graduated from my local community college with an associates in arts and science degree as a start for something bigger. I plan on going to a bigger and better school in the future though that won't happen until I can fork over the money for it and decide on what I want to do. Currently, I plan on working for quite some time to build up enough currency so I can move on and to kind of start my life since it was so hollow before and after college. This is where my concerns come in, I didn't work at all during my time in college because I used this time to fight some nasty demons that were disturbing me since my days in high school. At the end of high school, I was a very angry, bitter, socially awkward person who honestly didn't give a crap about anything. The angry, bitter, and not caring part is gone but I am still very socially awkward thanks to many different factors.

What is bothering me is that, will I be able to make friends and have a relationship in the future and near future? I mean, people honestly scare the living daylights out of me because I am afraid that any action I do will set off some sort of alarm that will make them just blast me to oblivion. It's almost like my mind is set to a 1984 mode where I am afraid that if I do something wrong, I will get canned because I didn't follow a proper procedure. This whole mindset is because of a couple of things, throughout my schooling before college I was bullied frequently and I was never able to get help from anyone. All I was told was to ignore it, despite it being both physical and mental abuse. I was frequently labeled as a fag and got bitch slapped, shoved into stuff, kicked in the shins, and my property destroyed. The other factor was that I was friends with a guy that I used to consider my best friend, but the thing is though is that he hated it when I was being myself the whole time I was friends with him.

This guy HATED it when I would bring up what if scenarios, talk about things he is not familiar with, laugh at stuff that is stupid (I couldn't admit to liking Family Guy or American Dad in front of him without him snapping at me for liking idiotic crap), and getting him to try new things. It also didn't help that he was a general asshole to me by implying that anything I did was wrong and would avoid talking to me because he was annoyed of the stuff I did, despite it not being anything bad. This has got me into this position where I am afraid to even be myself in front of anyone even if they don't care what I am doing. When someone walks into the room where I am doing something, I stop being afraid that I will be yelled and raged at for doing something. A good example is when I am listening to music, I must shut it off if someone comes near the room I am playing it in because I am afraid of them lashing out at me for listening to something that they do not approve of. This affected me because this was all done by someone that I thought at the time cared about me and generally enjoyed my presence, and to find out that all I did was just a nuisance to him just affected myself psychologically being permanently afraid of being myself in front of anyone, even if they truly cared about me.

As a result of this, I have not made any new friends outside of two that I was friends with before but wasn't really being a good friend to because of that guy I mentioned earlier. I have yet to have a girlfriend because I honestly don't know where to start and I am afraid that showing who I am will just make every female scoff and beat me for trying to even be friendly to them. I also get that same feeling when I talk to males as well, feeling like if I were to try and be friends with them it will all end in disaster since I don't know how to initiate a conversation without it ending in awkwardness. I have been getting slightly better at overcoming this problem thanks to breaking off ties with that friend I mentioned earlier, but I still have that problem and I can't say I know how to properly fix it. I would seek counseling but after a disaster with a counselor in high school trying to get me into Child Protective Services because of a meltdown from stress, I can't trust any form of psychological help at all and have yet to be convinced that going to seek it will result in everything getting better.

Ok this post did involve me getting a bit bitchy and emo. Sorry for the long post but I just had to spill this out somewhere and I feel that the GOG community will probably respond to it better than anyone else, I hope.

langurmonkey: AHAHAH, I have the same problem. They don't find me eloquent enough, not smooth enough because I'm not a PUA. And I see no point in being someone I'm not even though acting is easy for me because I'm past that stage where I just want to get laid. So I'm just blunt no bullshit old me so dating usually results in epic fail. It's not you being stupid. It's just you, like me, not living up to their garbage expectations.

Adzeth: It seems to me like you might have some attitude problems that could hinder you. It's one thing to be straightforward, whole another to pretty much claim that other people not getting along with you is their fault and that people who get along with them are pickup artists. If I was dating someone who expressed similar notions, I'd end it.

langurmonkey: LOL you are one amazing troll. You know that?

Adzeth: I'm not trolling. I am saying that a relationship isn't about one person. If the woman you were meeting said that everything that goes wrong is your fault and that she's just being honest and you should thank her for it, would you be thrilled about dating her?

langurmonkey: It's hard to take you seriously but if you are being serious, then before you continue being offended or whatever, know that I believe that there are many reasons why 2 people don't get along. And I do accept a possibility of me just fucking things up. My previous post only lists one reason(a reason I find to be most common), I know but I was talking to AlKim, not here to discuss dating. I know, I should of sent a PM, this is a public thread on a public forum on the internet, after all.